I work at a Publix as a cashier. Today at Work a customer needed help finding the snack aisle. As part of Publix policy I led the gentleman to the snack aisle. One we got there he specified he needed cookies, so I led him to the cookie aisle. Once we get to the aisle he looks me dead and the eye and says,”the reason they separate the snacks is because of George Bush.” Then he launches into conspiracy theory on the Vietnamese war, taxes, and cell phones and how much Republicans suck. As soon as I ditched him I cried I laughed so hard.

(I work at a large grocery store chain along the east coast. Our store is located right in the middle of a bad suburban neighborhood so we get a lot of bad customers all of the time. Just a couple of years ago we implemented a self scan gun system in our store so that the customers that want to just bag and scan their items themselves can just get out of the store quicker. Since day one we have problems with these things, in fact most people who steal from our store uses the self scan gun system to make it look like they are scanning their items to security….. But they walk out with the items they scan without paying. Anyways one day i was working at a register and a lady came up with a self scan gun for me to scan. I scan the gun and for some reason the gun glitched out and died. So i had to take out everything this lady scanned and start the order all over again. She didn’t have a problem with it but the customer behind her did.)
Customer 1 – I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS TAKING SO LONG! THESE SELF SCAN GUNS ARE *Censored*. THIS KID OBVIOUSLY HAS NO IDEA WHAT HE IS DOING *ect*
(It took almost every fiber of my being not to say a word. At the time i wished it was my last day working there because i would have just told him how i really felt. So as he proceeds to call me an idiot he turns to the line that was in front of me and starts talking to another customer asking them if all of the cashiers were this stupid.)
Customer 2 – Actually these cashiers know exactly what they are doing, your just very impatient.
(After that the first customer stopped talking. Soon after that i was finished with the current order i was on and rang him out. I didn’t say a word through out his entire order except for the price of his order. He pays and proceeds to find a manager to complain about me. At the end of my shift my manager pulls me aside)
Manager – Remember that guy that was yelling at you early on today.
Me – Yes
Manager – I just want to tell you that he is not allowed back her anymore.

(I am working behind the customer service counter when a customer comes up to complain about some policy.)

Me: *smiling politely* “I’m so sorry that we can’t do anything about it; we have to follow the policy, too.”

Customer: *crossly* “You don’t look very sorry!”

(I am a moderately good actress and can’t resist the opportunity. Instantly, I crumple up my face into an anguished expression, bring tears to my eyes, and, in quiveringly heartbroken tones, pronounce the following:)

Me: “I am so, so sorry! I am devastated to have to tell you this, but I honestly can do nothing. I wish—” *gulping hard* “—I could do something for you, but there is nothing I can do.”

Customer: *staring with a dropped jaw and bugged out eyes*

Me: *sweetly, in normal voice* “Is that better?”

(The customer closes his mouth, I start laughing, and he joins in.)

Customer: “Wow! You’re an amazing actress!”

(I smile and he grins back.)

Customer: “Well, I guess if you can’t, you can’t, but thanks for the laugh, anyway.”

(And he left with a smile on his face.)

(I go to a store to get some photos printed for my job, one of which is a photo of my cat. As I go to ask for my photos, an older cashier who isn’t actually specialized in photos comes to help me. Before I get to see my photos and pay, I hear a woman yelling.)

Woman: “What do you mean, you won’t take it?! I can’t stay here anymore! I’m about to leave!” 

(She walks over to the cashier who is in the middle of helping me. I stand back, a little afraid of what she might do.)

Woman: “Hey, you! I need your help! She says it won’t take this coupon!”

Cashier: “Well, miss, you actually have the wrong items.”

(The woman points to her coupon and back to her products.)

Woman: “No, see, look here. That’s [product], right? And this says, ‘[product].’”

Cashier: “Well, miss, nothing’s coming up. I’m sorry.”

Woman: “Well, then, your system is broken. I swear, every time! Look…”

(The woman is obviously upset, and she isn’t shy. This exchange continues for almost half an hour before she hands him her credit card and wanders off to find some chips to buy. At this point, I carefully go to get my photos to look at. But before I can purchase them, the woman is called back to the counter.)

Cashier: “Susan! Susan! Are you ready to check out?”

Woman: *still very frustrated* “Susan? My name’s Vicky! Ha, why are you calling me Susan? But that’s supposed to be on sale! I wouldn’t come here if I had to get things without these coupons!”

(She turns to me, and her demeanor changes drastically. She smiles at my picture of my cat.)

Woman: “Oh, is that your kitty? What’s her name?”

Me: *smiling nervously* “Mayhem.”

Woman: “Wow, Mayhem? She’s cute.” *to cashier* “These coupons should work!”

(Finally, she’s rung up, and she leaves the store.)

Me: “Does she come here a lot?”

Cashier: “Oh, yeah, everyone knows Susan. Give her a few hours; she’ll be back.”

(There are only two customer bathrooms and the men’s bathroom is closed for cleaning after a particularly nasty customer made the room a biohazard as revenge for us not taking his expired coupon. I witness a man running into the women’s bathroom but don’t say anything because he’s carrying a small child who is clearly about to have a potty emergency. There are women already in there, but none of them come up to complain about him being in there, so I figure they’re okay with the circumstances being what they are. A few moments later, another man approaches me.)

Man: “Excuse me, but did you know that there’s a man in the women’s restroom?”

Me: “Yes, actually, I was aware. The men’s room is closed because it’s being cleaned and he had a child with him that looked like he was about to have an emergency, so we just let him use it.”

Man: “Really? You’re okay with him being in there? My wife is in there! What if he rapes her?”

Me: *a little bit stunned* “Sir, I don’t think he’s going to touch your wife. I think he was more worried about keeping his son from wetting himself.”

Man: “I can’t believe you people! I’m going to call the cops!”

(Just then, a woman who’s left the bathroom and overheard the last bit of our conversation approaches him and smacks him upside the head. I’m guessing she’s his wife.)

Wife: “You’ll do no such thing! He was a complete gentleman and his son really had to go! None of us had any problem with him being in there! At least he takes his children to the bathroom when they have to go and doesn’t make excuses about how that’s the woman’s job like you always do!”

(She then dragged him from the store while berating him the entire time. The man and his son were in and out fairly quickly and I received no further complaints about them having been in there.)