Candy Crushed It

| MI, USA | Working | August 6, 2015

(I stop into a popular local store before dropping my young daughter off at daycare before work. As I am going through the checkout, I peruse the candy selection, thinking I’ll treat myself for once. I hear the cashier give a sarcastic little laugh.)

Cashier: “Typical.”

Me: “Are you talking to me?”

Cashier: “If you must know, yes. It’s so typical that little teenage single mothers like you, living off welfare on MY tax dollars, will come in here and waste it on junk food. YOU are what is wrong with this economy.”

Me: *shocked* “Wow. Okay. So, never mind the fact that I’m 22 years old. Far from being a teenage mother. Never mind that, while I am single, I was not when I had my daughter. It must be my fault my husband left us. Oh, and who cares that I work a full time job to support my daughter so I DON’T have to live off welfare, as you’re assuming I do. You think I’m what’s wrong with this economy? Well, clearly, YOU’RE what’s wrong with this COUNTRY!”

(I then took TWO candy bars and checked out with a different cashier.)

1 Thumbs

Feeling Bad For Jimmy

| Waukesha, WI, USA | Right | August 3, 2015

(It is 1995. I am 18 and working as a third shift stocker at a major grocery store chain. I am approached by an 18-20 year old white male.)

Customer: “Hey, man, you got any Jimmy Hats?”

Me: “…and they are?”

Customer: “You know man! Jimmy Hats! I need to get my Jimmy Hats. They are for my girl.”

Me: “Are they a type of candy? If so, aisle four, far end on your left.”

(The customer leaves off in that direction and I continue stocking. The customer comes back.)

Customer: “Hey, I couldn’t find them. I need to get the Jimmy Hats my girl wants.”

Me: “Okay, I will come look. Do you know what the packaging looks like?”

Customer: “Yeah, they are Jimmy Hats.”

(I walk him over to the candy aisle and start looking with him and he also looks through the candy.)

Customer: “See, man? I don’t see Jimmy Hats here anywhere.”

Me: “Okay, do you want me to page someone else for assistance?”

Customer: “No man, I just need the Jimmy Hats.”

Me: “Do you know what they look like?”

Customer: “Yeah! They look like Jimmy Hats.”

(This goes on for a bit like this in a horrible circle.)

Me: “Okay, I can’t help you. Let me page someone else.”

Customer: “Okay, hopefully they can help me find the Jimmy Hats.”

Me: *on intercom* “Customer in need of assistance in [aisle].”

(One of my coworkers comes over.)

Customer: “I need a box of Jimmy Hats for my girlfriend and he can’t find them.”

Coworker: *looks confused* “And they are?”

Customer: “JIMMY HATS! My girlfriend wants me to get a box of JIMMY HATS!”

(The customer suddenly looks embarrassed that he yelled that. Starts looking around nervously. A grandmother and her grandkids have now come into the aisle and start going through the candy.)

Coworker: “We might not carry that type of candy.”

Customer: “But they are Jimmy Hats. She said she got them here before!”

Coworker: “We might be out of stock.”

Customer: “But I need to get Jimmy Hats for my girl.”

(I go and get a female cashier to try and help him. The customer turns red.)

Customer: “Um. I just need them… you know…” *gestures downwards*

Me: *realizes* “Condoms?”

Customer: *he just blinks and nods*

Me: “Why didn’t you tell me it wasn’t candy when we were searching this aisle? You even looked at the candy.”

Customer: “Well, I am hungry…”

(I take customer to the proper area and he gets his condoms.)

Cashier: “Okay, one bag of Twizzlers and your Jimmy Hats.”

Customer: *just turns red, pays, and walks out*

1 Thumbs

Your Job Is A Joke

| NS, Canada | Working | July 20, 2015

(It’s a slow day, so a male coworker, a female coworker, and myself are chatting when we notice the light has burnt out on one of the registers. My male coworker grabs a new bulb and climbs up onto the register belt to change it. My female coworker and I follow.)

Me: “You’re so good at changing light bulbs!”

Male Coworker: “Thank you. I practice all the time. Wow, this thing is really dirty!”

Female Coworker: “Maybe you should do some cleaning while you’re up there…”

(Just then a customer walks up to us and looks from my coworker standing on the register to the two of us on the floor watching.)

Customer: “How many [store] employees does it take to change a light bulb?”

Not Sue-ted To Parenting

| Pasco, WA, USA | Right | July 20, 2015

(I’m in my check-stand when I see a customer’s child is standing on the cart’s seat.)

Me: “Sir, you really shouldn’t have your child standing on the seat.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because he could fall and injure himself.”

Customer: “It’s okay. I can just sue you guys if he falls.”

(The customer then proceeded to shop with the child standing on the seat. Luckily the child didn’t fall.)

Cooked Up A Good Comeback

| PA, USA | Friendly | July 17, 2015

(My boyfriend and I are standing in line for checkout with an older man behind us in a motorized shopping cart. The store specializes in bulk items so our cart is almost overflowing with groceries.)

Old Man: “You know, looking at you two I can tell you both must have had mothers that were good cooks. You obviously never went to bed hungry.”

(Both of us are of slightly larger stature. However, I happen to be eight months pregnant and am obviously showing.)

Me: *while faking a smile* “Actually my dad did the cooking, and he’s looking forward to being called grandpa.”

(The color drained from the old man’s face as he mumbled an apology and abandoned his spot in line.)

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