We were walking around Athens’s shopping district, popping by all sorts of tourist shops that sold postcards, decorative mugs, and other knickknacks. I came across this little shop selling chess sets, and I noticed some metal cast chess pieces that looked very nice. I’ve always wanted a set like that, so I went in.

The pieces were made in “Alexander vs. Persians” style and weren’t too pricey, but I wasn’t quite sure about the level of quality.

Me: “Are these sturdy? Do they break easily?”

Shop Owner: “Here, I’ll show you.”

The owner took a piece off the shelf and threw it down HARD onto the stone tile floor. Then he picked up the piece and gave it to me. It didn’t have a scratch on it.

Me: “I’ll take it!”

Now that’s quality testing!

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On our honeymoon in Greece, we nearly get stranded driving our little scooter back from a day trip as it is running out of fuel. We finally find a petrol station in this village, but it’s during afternoon nap/siesta time. We tap on the glass door of the station and a guy steps forward looking groggy.

Me: “Sorry, we didn’t want to wake you up, but we’re almost out of petrol, and we don’t want to be driving back in the dark later.”

We apologise as best we can in the little Greek we know. The guy obliges but looks a little annoyed.

Station Owner: “Where are you from?”

Me: “New Zealand.”

His face lights up and he looks amazed.

Station Owner: “I have never met someone from New Zealand before! What are you doing so far away from home?”

Me: “It’s our honeymoon.”

He tells us to wait there and comes back with a bottle of wine that’s obviously worth more than the €6 of petrol we are buying. He refuses to let us round up the bill for the petrol or buy anything to make up for it.

Station Owner: “Honeymoon is honeymoon. Be happy. Go.”

Hands down one of the best highlights of our trip.

My family and I walked into a lovely Greek taverna only to hear the Greek owner tell the two locals in front of us that she was fully booked and there were no tables available. If the locals can’t get in, then who can?

As we turned round to walk out, an American family was walking in. Being sociable, I told the father that the place was full. Without even looking at me, he just said:

Father: “Buddy… let’s see how busy this place is when I drop her a $100 sweetener.”

We walked out. Then, we ended up walking round the back of the taverna… which didn’t have the American family inside it. It turns out that if it’s full, it’s full, no matter how arrogant you are.

During my mom’s vacation in Greece, she’s browsing in a small store. There’s a couple from Germany also browsing the store.

German Customer: *Rudely, in German.* “Ugh, why can’t the store owner speak German?”

They end up complaining about everything and then leave. My mom is so ashamed of them that she goes to the store owner.

Mom: “I want to apologize for that couple. They should not have been so rude!”

Before Mom can translate, the store owner replies in fluent German.

Store Owner: “I actually speak German very well! I used to be a translator. I just didn’t want to communicate with those a**holes!”

I’m enjoying the sun and resting on the deck of my boat in the harbour when a young woman and her husband yell at me. This is a “Mandrake” where all visiting boats dock, get water and electricity, and enjoy the city. We are tourists, like the majority of the boats. 

Woman: “I want to hire a boat.”

Me: “Well, this boat is not for hire; it’s our sailing boat and we are tourists here.”

Woman: “But I need to hire a boat. There are boats here. Can’t you take us somewhere?”

Me: “No. This is not a commercial boat. I can’t do that.”

Woman: “But I’m told that there are boats for hire around here!”

Me: “Well, as I told you, I’m a tourist, this is our own boat, and I don’t know where you can find a boat to hire.”

Woman: “Why can’t you take us somewhere? You don’t seem to like being busy.”

Me: “Good day!”

I just stopped answering her. She yelled some more and then left. 

Her husband was looking on in despair.