I was working as a receptionist at a vet clinic to pay my way through my degree in Graphic Design. I was in my last semester of the program and beginning to accept freelance work in my free time. My boss knew this and approached me with some work.

Client: “Hey, we need a flyer for an upcoming event. Can you whip something up? Here’s the information.”

Me: “I can’t really do this here; all we have on these computers is Word.”

Client: “Why don’t you use your designer programs? We need something eye-catching!”

Me: “Just to be clear, you’re asking me to use programs that I pay for out of my pocket, on my personal laptop that I also paid for, during work hours, at a job where I was not hired for my skills as a graphic designer, to create a professionally designed product for you, with no increase in my hourly rate? I’m sorry, but no. If you would like, we can certainly discuss my freelance rates after hours. I charge $25 an hour, and I estimate that a flyer of this type would take two to three hours.”

Client: “Seriously? That’s way too much for a simple flyer! Isn’t there, like, a friends and family discount?

Me: “No.”

He was silent for a moment and then went back to his office. He later made his own version of the flyer using Word, using about five conflicting fonts in various colors.

This encounter was pretty typical of the culture there, and I quit two weeks later.

This is an actual conversation with a client over email. Because they are on the other side of the world, we have a twelve-hour delay for each response. The file in question is a 75MB .WAV file.

Me: “Thanks for your order. Because the file size is too big, please follow the link below to access your product. If you have any problems, please let me know.”

Client: “Hey! Thanks for the email. There wasn’t anything attached, though. Can you please send it again?”

Me: “Yep, the file is too big to attach. There was a link at the bottom of the email. Here it is again.”

Client: “You forgot to attach the file again.”

Me: “I didn’t forget. I provided a link to where you can download it.”

Client: “YOU STILL HAVEN’T ATTACHED IT!”

Me: “I can’t attach the file; it is too big. You can download it here. Click this link, and you will get it.”

Client: “You’re so incompetent. How can you not attach a file to an email? What the f*** are you doing in this business? Attach the f****** file or give me a refund.”

Me: “The file is TOO BIG TO ATTACH. Click THIS LINK. FROM THERE, YOU CAN DOWNLOAD THE FILE.”

The client then logged a dispute on PayPal. They never clicked the link or accessed the file.

Fifteen years ago when I was starting my career as a graphic designer, I was hired part-time by a small design agency. By “small” I mean that it was just the owner, a senior designer, and me. The salary was not high, but I was happy because it was really close to where I lived and I was building a real portfolio, apart from what I had made in design school.

One day, the owner asked me to make a logo for her husband’s company. She told me, really excitedly and proudly, that I would receive my first commission for doing the logo. She offered to pay 10% of the logo selling price. At the time, we sold logos for $150, so I was expecting to get about $15 as a commission. (I don’t live in America; this is converted to US dollars).

I designed a logo, and both my boss and her husband liked it. Everyone was happy… until I got my commission.

She added $1.50 to my paycheque.

Me: “Hey, I think you made a typo; you only paid me $1.50 for my commission.”

Client: “Oh, no, that’s right.”

Me: “So, you’re saying you sold my logo… for $15?”

Client: “Well, he is my husband. I gave him a discount!”

She smiled like she was really teaching me something. And I guess she was: to always negotiate in advance and never trust a client.

Later, I learned that the senior designer left when the owner pulled the same move, asking them to design a cookbook for “a friend”.

I was in charge of the signage for a marathon. One of the sponsors was concerned about how their logo appeared next to other sponsors.

Client: “Is there any way for our logo to be better represented?”

Me: “I’m not sure what you’re looking for in terms of signage. Can you be more specific?”

Client: “Just make it so the other logo underneath ours is a little more ‘logo-y’.”

Me: “You want us to change another company’s logo?”

Client: “Don’t change it! Just make it look better next to ours.”

Me: “How?”

Client: “By making it more ‘logo-y’.”

Client: “Make the words right there bold.”

Me: “They’re already bold. If you want them to stand out more, we could—”

Client: “No, shut up. Just make it bolderer.”