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No One Should Be Forced To Put Up With This Garbage

, , , , , , , | Working | August 24, 2022

When I worked in security in my early twenties, I got placed at a top-secret site. The guards there were all long-timers since it was a higher pay level due to the security clearance requirement. The site had two sections, and after I had been there for a couple of years, I got transferred to the second one around the corner. I joined my new shift and met my shift supervisor and the other patrol guard.

We were on a twelve-hour rotating shift. We worked twelve hours a day for a total of seven days in a fourteen-day period, and then we switched day/night. So, it was two weeks of days and then two weeks of nights, over and over. It was stressful, and sometimes your shift-mates were the only people you’d talk to for days at a time on nights.

Enter [Coworker]. [Coworker] had been working at that site for probably six years at that point. He was a white guy in his early forties.

[Coworker] was a bigot. If you could find a difference between two people, [Coworker] hated one of the options. He would go on hours-long rants about “foreigners stealing jobs” or “effing [Language]-speaking people,” etc., etc., etc.

Oddly enough, it was always said matter-of-factly, not with rage. He’d spout racist nonsense with people of that race in the room, or sexist BS in front of women, but it was not directed specifically at them. He created a toxic pall of negative energy around him, and no one could get him to shut up. And because the company was all old-guard-type people, he got ignored instead of being called out.

For instance: one Christmas Eve, I was on the night shift with my shift supervisor, a sweet lady who happens to be a [Language] speaker and a lesbian. I’m a young woman, not ex-military, and I also speak [Language]. We were sitting together before our shift started.

Supervisor: “[My Name], I can’t take [Coworker]’s rants tonight, not tonight of all nights.”

Me: “Me, neither. I’m not spending Christmas Eve listening to his BS.”

[Coworker] came in and we sat watching the TV, waiting for our patrol time to start.

Coworker: “I can’t believe our company is hiring so many [racial slur], [LGBT slur] [Language]-speaking women who’ve never been in the military. It’s—”

Supervisor & Me: “[Coworker]!”

I stopped and let her continue since she was our boss.

Supervisor: “No, no, I am not sitting here all night listening to you talk like that. If you can’t talk about the weather or sports, I don’t want to hear it. Okay?”

[Coworker] was stunned, and he didn’t say a single word for the rest of the night that wasn’t about work. It was glorious.

I had to work with [Coworker] for two years, until one day he was telling a racist joke to an employee (probably against their will) and the CEO was walking down the hall behind him. [CEO] was pissed. He went to our big boss.

CEO: “I want that guy gone — yesterday.”

Then, when he saw [Coworker] the next day because the company was trying to find him a new site the CEO went back to the big boss.

CEO: “When I said, ‘gone,’ I meant ‘gone.’ His access to the site is revoked. He’s not allowed here ever again.”

After that, it was a lot more peaceful on our shift.

Dean Winchester Has Really Gone Downhill

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: paul_stanley_armada | July 4, 2022

I have spent twenty years at seven different major brand hotels. I am training a new clerk when a portly old bald guy in his sixties comes in and asks for the government rate. He’s dressed like a relic from the 1970s in a really tacky polyester jacket. Per normal procedure, I ask him for some government ID.

He opens his jacket to pull out his ID and at the same time very deliberately displays a huge .44 magnum hogleg in a shoulder holster. The ID is fake — a bad fake. I mean, you know that embossed label tape you used to put your name on stuff when you were a kid? It is basically a photo ID with “F.B.I.” in label tape underneath it. The hotel is far from full, so I shrug and check him in at the government rate.

After he leaves…

Trainee: “Wow, was that guy really FBI?”

Me: “I highly doubt it. I have actually spoken to FBI agents in this job before, and they never look like that. See that guy standing over there?”

I point at a young man in a dark suit who has been hanging around in the lobby for the past twenty minutes.

Me: “Now that is what FBI agents usually look like.”

At that exact moment, the same young man approached the front desk, pulled out his very real FBI credentials, and asked for information on the man who had just checked in. About an hour later, the guy was led out in handcuffs.

It was one of those rare events in life that unfolds like a movie.

Just Let Sleeping Cats Lie

, , , , | Working | June 28, 2022

My beloved cat is twenty years old and extremely scraggly. She is as healthy as can be expected for a very old cat but is very thin and odd-looking. She likes to sunbathe in the garden. One day, I hear a noise through the front window and see someone trying to coax her into a box. I rush out to stop him.

Me: “Stop! What are you doing?”

Man: “I’m an animal warden from the council, and there have been reports about this stray cat.”

Me: “She’s not a stray; she’s just old!”

Man: “Are you sure?”

Me: *Pauses* “Yes, I’ve had her since she was a kitten twenty years ago. She’s definitely mine.”

Once the warden understood, he was very apologetic, but I keep a closer eye on the cat when she’s in the garden now. She continues to enjoy herself lounging on the garden path.

Must Be Here For The Secret Sales

, , , , , | Right | June 13, 2022

After college, I worked at a fabric store just outside of Washington, DC. One day, a member of the Secret Service came in and informed us that the wife of a foreign leader wanted to shop in our store. He needed to check out the layout and entrances to be sure there were no risks. He walked around and had us lock the loading dock door, but he said we could stay open for regular business while this VIP was shopping.

The lady showed up about an hour or so later with a couple more male agents. She spent a long time shopping (spending thousands of dollars) so a lot of customers came and went while she was there. A few of them asked why the Secret Service was there.

The lead agent came over to me at one point and said:

Agent: “Please don’t tell anyone we are with the Secret Service.”

Me: “Uh, sir, this is a fabric store and we don’t get many male customers in the first place. You are wearing earpieces and suits; it’s obvious who you are!”

The VIP had such a great time that she came back the next day to buy more fabric. This time, her security detail wore Hawaiian shirts. They didn’t look any less conspicuous!

Dug Himself Right Into A Hole Of Stupid

, , , , , , | Working | CREDIT: johndeerekid77 | June 3, 2022

I live out on an acreage, and during the spring, our ditch that lets water out of our yard plugs up with snow. We have a wheel loader and an excavator to deal with these issues. It should also be said that we have the exact same excavator as our local rural municipality.

We were out working with the excavator, unplugging the ditch. The base of the excavator was sitting on the road and the boom was reaching down into the ditch. I was sitting in the cab when a black pickup truck rolled up with the orange flashing lights and the rural municipality logos all over it.

The guy in the truck got out, walked around the back of the machine, came over to the cab, and ripped the door open, smashing it against the side of the machine, breaking the main window.

Man: *Yelling in my face* “What do you think you’re doing?!”

Me: “Um, working in our ditch.”

Man: “Do you know who I am?! I could have your job for this!”

Then, I realized he thought that I worked for the rural municipality. I replied by pointing to where the rural municipality decal usually is on their excavators; it wasn’t there on our excavator. He looked and saw that it was missing the decal, and then he looked at me, and then at my dad standing in the ditch.

Then, he realized that we didn’t work for the rural municipality. He shuffled back to his truck, looking very embarrassed about the situation.

We later got an email from the rural municipality saying that they would replace the glass and an apology letter from the guy. In the end, we put our own decals on our excavator so this wouldn’t happen again.