This Is Why We Need Black History Month

, , , , | | Right | May 15, 2019

(I work in a restaurant at a golf club. We have a few servers that came from Africa to work for us. As I walk by a table of patrons, I hear an intoxicated member talking loudly.)

Member: “I thought all black people came from America.”

The Great Golf War

, , , , , | Working | July 12, 2018

(It’s our company’s annual Golf Day. It’s a fun event. Basically, we get to golf all afternoon at a reduced price, then eat a nice dinner.)

Event Organizer: “[My Name], could you do me a big favour?”

Me: “Well, I was just about to start golfing—”

Event Organizer: “I know, but the other person organizing Golf Day is stuck in traffic, and I need help assigning everyone to their golf carts and making sure that they’re supplied with bottled water. It’ll take about 30 minutes.”

Me: “Uh… Okay, I guess.”

Event Organizer: “Thanks!” *leaves*

Me: “Wait! What exactly do I do?”

Event Organizer: “You’ll figure it out.”

(I did my best, but because I hadn’t done this before, I was slow – plus, I was unable to get everyone their bottled water before their tee-off time. Some people were visibly annoyed. I got very stressed and upset, and the people I was supposed to be golfing with weren’t impressed to be delayed. Still, it all turned out well in the end – or so I thought. Two days later:)

Event Organizer: “Uh, hi, [My Name]. I’m really sorry to tell you this, but you might be getting a call from HR.”

Me: “What? Why?”

Event Organizer: “Apparently, you missed supplying a couple of golf carts with their bottled water. One of the retirees was really angry, and she told me she was going to call HR to complain about you.”

Me: “I can’t believe this. She got that angry over a free water that maybe cost fifty cents?”

Event Organizer: “Well, she’s a retiree. Maybe she has nothing better to do with her time.”

Like Stealing Candy From A Cry-Baby

, , , , , | Right | February 6, 2018

(I work in the pro shop at a local golf course. Recently, there have been some large crows hanging around the parking area that will snatch candy, crackers, or chips right out of a golf cart if they have the opportunity.)

Customer: *storms into the pro shop* “That crow stole my candy bar out of the golf cart! I want another candy bar!”

Me: “No problem. That will be $1.00.”

Customer: “What? No! I want you to give me another candy bar free, because that crow took it out of your golf cart!”

Me: “Sorry, sir, but it’s not our responsibility what nature does to your food.”

Customer: *now almost screaming* “That’s wrong. It was a crow on your property!”

Me: “Sir, we have no control over what a bird does outside of our building.”

Customer: “That’s bulls***. I’m just going to take another candy bar!” *picks up one and starts walking toward the door*

Me: “Sir, you must pay for that candy bar; if you walk out without paying, I will have to call the police.”

Customer: “No, you won’t.”

Me: “Yes, I will. I have your name, and you gave us your phone number when you made your tee time. The police will find you and arrest you for petty theft.”

Customer: *returns the candy bar to the rack and leaves*

Unfiltered Story #102726

, , | Unfiltered | January 4, 2018

(I work in gold course maintenance. After a day of working out in the sun, my group and I are walking back to our maintenance barn. A car we don’t recognize comes zooming out of the yard, coming at us. It stops and a heavy set guy has his music up loud and is banging his head along with it, He is also yelling.)

Guy: “H*** Yea! I start tomorrow you guys! I’m gonna be your new best friend! This is going to be awesome! YEAH!”

)We all look at him, thinking “Really?” We can’t imagine this guy in the hot Texas sun for very long.)

Guy: “Yeah! It’s gonna be AWESOME! I can’t wait! See you guys tomorrow!”

(We get back to the barn and ask our boss if what the guy said was true.)

Boss: “Yeah he was so excited to be working here; just kept going on and on about how great it was going to be.”

(We never saw him again.)

Champagne And Pregnant?

| Cotswolds, England, UK | Right | September 14, 2016

(I work as a barmaid at a private golf course. Most of our clientele are elderly gentlemen with absolutely impeccable manners and it’s a lovely place, but there are some younger members of the club who are in this particular day. It’s one of our semi-annual ‘bring your family along’ events and we have a lot of people’s grandchildren and such around but it’s all well-run and behaved. Until…)

Woman: *twenty-something* “Give me a champagne.”

Me: “Certainly, which one would you prefer? We have Moet and Chandon, Bollinger—”

Woman: “—just anything. Whatever.”

(I pour out a glass of our usual standard and place it on the bar in front of her.)

Me: “Here you are, ma’am. Will there be anything else?”

Woman: “Took your f****** time didn’t you?”

Me: “I am not certain what you mean. You asked for this drink and I poured it for you. Is there a way we could have done this faster?”

Woman: “You’re not here to question me. My husband makes more in a month that you’ll see in your lifetime.”

Me: “Will there be anything else?”

Woman: “No.”

(She starts to walk off but turns around, puts the glass on the bar, leans over, and smacks me across the face.)

Woman: “Learn. Your. Place.”

(I kept working, but, even though my manager saw all this happening, she did nothing. I was later told that the woman in question was ‘expecting a baby’ and therefore we should ‘expect a bit of irrational behavior.’ We’ve not seen her again, though.)

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