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Must Be From The Valley

, , , , , | Right | May 1, 2008

(Let it be known that there are only two ways to get to Catalina Island: by boat or by helicopter.)

Me: “[Hotel]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I’d like to make a reservation. And when’s the earliest we can check in?”

Me: “Normally not until noon but we may be able to make an exception. When is your boat scheduled to arrive?”

Customer: “Oh, no, we’re not coming by boat.”

Me: “Okay, helicopter, then?”

Customer: “Oh, no, that’s silly.”

Me: “Well, may I ask how your planning to get here?”

Customer: “Down the 405, duh!”

Me: “I’m sorry, you can’t drive to Catalina Island.”

Customer: “You can’t?”

Me: “No, it’s an island. You know, surrounded by water.”

Customer: “Catalina Island is an ISLAND?!”

Me: *headdesk*


This story is part of our 3rd Terrible At Geography roundup!

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The Uneducated States Of America

, , | Right | March 29, 2008

(I was a toll-free operator. If a caller asked for something and there was ANY difference in the listing from what was requested, we were required to notify the caller and get approval from the caller before providing the number.)

Caller: “I would like [insurance company] in Delaware.”

Me: “I have a listing for [insurance company,] but I have it listed out of New Hampshire. Would that be acceptable?”

Caller: “New Hampshire? Where the h*** is New Hampshire?”

Me: “It’s in New England.”

Caller: “New England?! I don’t want any New England! I need a number in the United States!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, then. I don’t have any listed.”


This story is part of our 3rd Terrible At Geography roundup!

Read the next Terrible At Geography roundup story!

Read the 3rd Terrible At Geography roundup!

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The (Mystery) State Of The Union

, , | Right | March 27, 2008

(I was an 800-directory operator. We weren’t information, we just gave you 1-800 numbers.)

Caller: “Excuse me, but what state is Kentucky in?”

Me: “Well, Kentucky IS a state.”

Caller: “Yeah, but what state is it in?”

Me: “Sir, it’s not IN a state. There are 50 states, and Kentucky is one of them.”

Caller: “Well, there’s 52 states if you count Alaska and Hawaii.”

Me: “There’s only 52 states if you count Alaska and Hawaii TWICE. But there’s only 51 if you don’t count Kentucky.”

Caller: *click*

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Imperialism At Its Finest

, , , | Right | February 27, 2008

Customer: *hands over US Currency while trying to buy a T-Shirt*

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we don’t take US Currency. We do, however, take debit, all major credit card–”

Customer: *cuts me off* “Why the h*** can’t you take my money?! This is the U. S. OF A!”

Me: “No, sir, this is the Yukon Territory, in Canada.”

Customer: “No it’s not! This is the USA! Alaska! I’ve been driving on the Alaska Highway for hours so that makes this Alaska!”

Me: “No sir. This is the Yukon… we’re part of Canada… the Alaska Highway LEADS to Alaska and–”

Customer: *again, cutting me off* “Don’t you ever look at a map?! The Yukon is IN Alaska, and that’s part of the United States! You HAVE to take my money!”

Me: “The Yukon is part of Canada, we are NEXT to Alaska, which is part of the United States…”

(The customer gets angry, slams his item on the counter and storms out, muttering something about “stupid kids.”)


This story is part of our 3rd Terrible At Geography roundup!

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Read the 3rd Terrible At Geography roundup!

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Overuse Of The Discrimination Card

, , , , | Right | December 9, 2007

Customer: “Do you have any maps of South Africa?”

(We’re in Ontario, Canada.)

Me: *having a look* “No, it seems we don’t. Your best bet will be to check online or to wait until you get there.”

Customer: “But you have maps of everywhere else! I looked on the computer and it said you had them!”

Me: “Did we have any in stock?”

Customer: “You have maps of places all over the states, but not South Africa.”

Me: “I guess there’s more interest because people can drive there.”

Customer: “This is discrimination! I want a map of South Africa.”

Me: “Let me go check the computer again.” *runs*


This story is part of the South Africa Roundup!

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