Doesn’t Know One’s (Gas) Station

| Medicine Hat, AB, Canada | Right | January 21, 2016

(A customer comes in and asks to use the phone to call a cab.)

Customer: “Can I get a taxi to the [Wrong Name] on Kingsway.”

Me: “Sir, this isn’t [Wrong Name], That’s down the street. This is [Our Name].”

Customer: “No, it’s not. Are you sure?”

Me: “Well I DO work here, unless I’ve been coming to work at the wrong place. You DID walk past the name about 20 times, but if you don’t believe me, that’s completely fine.”

(20 minutes later, a taxi comes in for fuel.)

Customer: “What took you so long? They said five or ten minutes!”

Taxi Driver: “Nope. No call for here, but there was a call for [Wrong Name] and nobody was there.”

Customer: “…Oh. I guess he was right. Can I still get a ride?”

Put Them In High Spirits

, | St. Louis, MO, USA | Working | January 16, 2016

(I am an overnight clerk at a convenience store. A woman comes in late, buying alcohol, and I can’t tell her age.)

Me: “Can I see your ID, please?”

(The woman gets flustered, shows her ID, and leaves with her alcohol, still visibly flustered. About an hour later a man pulls up to the market looking angry. He comes in and stands over me.)

Menacing Guy: “You the guy that asked my woman for ID?”

Me: *gulp* “Uh, yeah. You see the… law says… and I’m new…”

(The menacing guy breaks out in a huge smile and sticks out his hand.)

Menacing Guy: “Thanks, man. You made my wife’s night!”

(The guy left happy, and after that I made sure to ask every woman for ID.)

Calling Out Their Stupidity

| NY, USA | Right | January 16, 2016

(I’ve been working at a gas station for about seven months, mostly on third shifts. I do, however, occasionally get scheduled for morning or afternoon shifts when someone needs me to cover.)

Me: “All right, your total comes to [total].”

Customer: “You must be new. I come here all the time and it’s always [incorrect price].”

Me: “You must be stupid, because even with the coupon that I used, it’s [actual price].”

Customer: “Don’t talk to me like that! Get me your manager!”

(If no manager is around, the person who’s worked there longest becomes acting manager.)

Me: “I am acting manager right now. And frankly, my boss would tell you the same thing because we put up with scammers like you all the time. Now, you either pay or leave.”

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A Centless Amount Of Gas

| Murfreesboro, TN, USA | Right | January 15, 2016

Me: “Welcome to [Gas Station]. What can I get for you?”

(The ‘customer’ scoops the ten cents out of the leave a penny take a penny and hand them to me.)

Customer: “I need this in gas on pump three.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but you need at least 86 cents in order to purchase gas.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, I just need this in gas.” *tries to hand me the ten cents again*

Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t put that low of an amount on the pump. It won’t let me.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, can I bum a dollar?”

(My coworker gave him a dollar, so he got $1.10 in gas.)

Thought It Was One Giant Smoking Mirror

, | PA, USA | Right | January 12, 2016

(We sell cigarettes, and you can clearly see them as soon as you walk in the door.)

Customer: “Excuse me; do you guys sell cigarettes here?”

Me: *being humorous, thinking he is as well* “No, we don’t, sir.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. I’ll go somewhere else.”

(As he started to leave, another cashier motioned to the wall of hundreds of cigarettes behind the counter, and lucky us, he found humor in his mistake, as well as we did.)

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