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Didn’t See The Smoke Signals

| Right | February 18, 2016

(In Minnesota, it’s the law to card people that look under the age of 40 if they are buying tobacco or tobacco-related products. If you refuse to show ID, even if you look over 18, we cannot sell to you after we’ve asked for it.)

Me: “Hi there! What can I get for you?”

Female Customer: “Can I have a pack of Camel Crush?”

Me: “Sure! Can I see your ID?”

Female Customer: “I don’t have it with me.”

Me: “Sorry, but I can’t sell to you without an ID.”

Female Customer: “I’m 28; my birth year is 1986.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t sell to you without a proper form of identification.”

Female Customer: “Well, fine! I’ll just go somewhere else.”

Me: “Have a nice night.”

(I watch her storm out to the truck on one of our pumps. I watch as a guy gets out of the driver’s side and comes into the store.)

Me: “Hi there! How can I help you?”

Male Customer: “Can I get a pack of Camel Crush and a tin of Grizzly Wintergreen?”

Me: “Sir, if you are trying to buy a pack of cigarettes for the girl that was just in here, then I cannot sell to you.”

Male Customer: “She’s 28.”

(He basically just admitted that he is associated with her and probably buying her cigarettes.)

Me: “It doesn’t matter, sir. She failed to produce a proper form of ID when asked. I cannot sell to either of you.”

Male Customer: “That’s ridiculous. She’s 28 and I smoke, too.”

Me: “That’s the law, sir. You’ve admitted you are trying to buy cigarettes for her and I saw you get out of the same truck she got into. I cannot sell to you.”

Male Customer: “That’s f****** ridiculous! I’ll be back in the morning to talk to your manager!”

Me: “Okay, good luck! Make sure to read the signs in the store next time that say we card anyone under 40! Have a nice night!”

(They never talked to a manager or the corporate office.)

Not A Very Rewarding Experience

| Right | February 17, 2016

Customer: “I have gas on pump four.”

(I’m not seeing a transaction on four (diesel) but one on pump two (regular gas). Both pumps are next to each other and get easily confused.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, do you mean pump two? Pump four is diesel and there isn’t any gas on that pump.”

Customer: “Yes, pump two. That’s what I said.”

Me: “All right, sir. That will be [price].”

Customer: “I have this card, too, but it didn’t work out there.”

(He hands me the rewards card from the store we don’t support.)

Me: “I’m sorry sir but we don’t take [Grocery Store] rewards card. We have a deal with our local grocery store.”

Customer: “That’s fine; I’ll just never get gas here again. Don’t you have a five cent off discount or something?”

Me: “If you use your [Gas Store] credit card or [Other Partner Goods Store] credit card, then it will automatically take off five cents per gallon.”

Customer: “You don’t have a five cent off discount for people that have the [Grocery Store] rewards card?”

Me: “Not unless you use one of those cards, sir.”

Customer: “Well, [Name] at [our other nearby store] gives me a five cent discount all the time because I don’t have that pump perks thing.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I’m not [Name] and this is not that store. This is also the reason we don’t give out the discount because you have access to a list of stores that take that card online and you obviously are abusing the privilege of getting a five cent discount at [our other nearby store].”

Customer: “Whatever. I’m never stopping here again.”

Me: “That’s fine with me, sir. I’ll be sure to inform corporate to tell the other store that they cannot give you a discount in the future for not having the appropriate rewards card and demanding discounts, when you know the store doesn’t participate with that certain reward program. Have a nice day.”

(He stormed out in a huff.)

Has A Decent (Dead)Pool Of Characters To Choose From

| Right | February 13, 2016

(I am a 25-year-old female. A male customer, probably around my age, comes up to my counter where I’m cashiering. I notice his t-shirt, which has several Marvel Comics characters on it.)

Me: “I like your t-shirt.”

(Customer looks at me and raises an eyebrow, like he clearly doesn’t believe I’d be a comic book fan.)

Customer: *pretentiously* “Yeah, a lot of people say that. The real question is, which one is your favorite?”

Me: “Captain America, although I also have a fondness for the Hulk.”

Customer: “My favorites are Thor and Wolverine.”

Me: “I also really like Deadpool.”

(The customer pauses and looks confused.)

Customer: “Which one?”

Me: “Deadpool.”

Customer: *clearly having no idea who Deadpool is* “Oh…”

(The guy behind him in line gave me an admiring look.)

Doesn’t Know One’s (Gas) Station

| Right | January 21, 2016

(A customer comes in and asks to use the phone to call a cab.)

Customer: “Can I get a taxi to the [Wrong Name] on Kingsway.”

Me: “Sir, this isn’t [Wrong Name], That’s down the street. This is [Our Name].”

Customer: “No, it’s not. Are you sure?”

Me: “Well I DO work here, unless I’ve been coming to work at the wrong place. You DID walk past the name about 20 times, but if you don’t believe me, that’s completely fine.”

(20 minutes later, a taxi comes in for fuel.)

Customer: “What took you so long? They said five or ten minutes!”

Taxi Driver: “Nope. No call for here, but there was a call for [Wrong Name] and nobody was there.”

Customer: “…Oh. I guess he was right. Can I still get a ride?”


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Calling Out Their Stupidity

| Right | January 16, 2016

(I’ve been working at a gas station for about seven months, mostly on third shifts. I do, however, occasionally get scheduled for morning or afternoon shifts when someone needs me to cover.)

Me: “All right, your total comes to [total].”

Customer: “You must be new. I come here all the time and it’s always [incorrect price].”

Me: “You must be stupid, because even with the coupon that I used, it’s [actual price].”

Customer: “Don’t talk to me like that! Get me your manager!”

(If no manager is around, the person who’s worked there longest becomes acting manager.)

Me: “I am acting manager right now. And frankly, my boss would tell you the same thing because we put up with scammers like you all the time. Now, you either pay or leave.”