Wish They Would Stop Trucking Swearing

, , , , , , , | Right | November 17, 2017

(The mall where I work has construction going on near our store, and the nearest mall door is closed off to customers. There are security guards posted to let construction and mall workers in and out. One of my employees has used the emergency exit in our backroom that opens up into the designated smoking area and the construction area. He returns from his smoke break and opens the door to the backroom to come back to work, followed by someone who shouldn’t be in my backroom. The stranger walks right past me and out of my store.)

Me: “What the…?”

Employee: “He’s a foreman or something for the construction, and the security guards aren’t there to let him in. I just did him a favour.”

Me: “How noble of you, but you know better than to let a random dude from outside into the backroom! If the managers or head office had come in, you’d be in a ton of trouble! No more randoms through the backroom door, understood?”

Employee: “Yeah, I get it. My bad.”

(Ten minutes later, the same random dude walks back into the store.)

Construction Guy: “Can you let me out through there?”

Me: “No, sir. I can’t have non-employees going into the backroom. [Employee] let you in to do you a favour, but I can’t let you exit through there.”

Construction Guy: “Seriously? I’ve already been back there; stop being a d*** and just let me leave. The exit doors won’t open.”

Me: “Yeah, and that was a one-time deal, and a mistake that [Employee] made. But I can’t let you back there again. The security personnel just walked past the store; if you catch up to them, they’ll be more than happy to let you out.”

Construction Guy: “What the f***?! My truck is sitting out there!”

Me: “If you keep being so ridiculously crass in a store full of kids, I’m going to have security remove you. [Employee], call the security office.”

Construction Guy: “F*** YOU, A**HOLE! IF SOMEBODY STEALS MY TRUCK I’LL F****** SUE YOU!”

Me: “You can try, and now I’m going to escort you to the door.” *starts to walk around the counter*

Construction Guy: “Whatever! Hope you have a great day, b****!”

Me: “Thank you; I will. You take care, now.”

(He started to walk out, head turned to continue screaming profanities at me, and promptly walked right into the massive glass window at the front of the store. All the customers started laughing at him as he picked himself up and stormed out, as I chuckled and waved goodbye.)

Lost That Game Before It Even Started

, , , , | Right | September 28, 2017

(The return policy at the game store where I work is clearly printed on the receipts, but many people don’t bother to read them. A sketchy-looking customer approaches me.)

Customer: *tosses bag down on the counter* “I’d like to return this, man.”

Me: “Not a problem! Just give me one second to process that for you.” *runs through the procedure quickly* “Okay, I’ll just need to swipe the card that you used to purchase [Game].”

Customer: “Nah, I just need the cash back. Don’t have no card.”

Me: *internally sighing* “Okay, let me just check on something with my manager.” *I go back to explain the situation*

Manager: *shakes head* “If he doesn’t have the card he used to purchase, have him use a different one.”

Me: “Sorry, sir. We need a card of some sort in order to process this return.”

Customer: “I already told you that I don’t have a card. I just need the cash! I saw this sitting on a bench. Some dude left it and I figured I’d get money for it.”

Me: *speechless*

Customer: “Just give it back. Never mind…”

(He takes the product and starts walking out of the store. On his way, he bumps into another guy hurrying through the door.)

Customer: “Hey, I recognize you. This is your stuff. I suppose you can have it back.”

Other Guy: “Thank you!” *happily walks out with his stuff*

(I explained the situation to the manager once I’d recovered. He shook his head, muttered about potential fraud, and looked through the security footage. That’s one man who won’t be welcome back in our store!)

How A DS RPG Killed The ESRB

, , | | Right | September 21, 2017

Throwback ThursdaysTHROWBACK THURSDAY! Check out this awesome story that you may have missed! What’s a crazy videogame related experience you’ve had? Let us know in the comments!

(Customer brings a mediocre role playing game for the Nintendo DS up to the counter.)

Customer: “Hey, would this game be good for an eight year old?”

Me: “Well, does he like RPGs?”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t let him watch anything rated R.”

Me: “Oh…I mean, does he like role playing games?”

Customer: “Whats that? That like one of them Mario games?”

Me: “No, it’s one where you follow a story line and usually has a lot of reading, like Final Fantasy. Has he ever played anything like that before?”

Customer: “Oh, he don’t read books. And I don’t like that it’s rated R and PG.”

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Their Prank A Far Cry From Success

| KY, USA | Right | August 4, 2017

(Working at a well-known video game store can be fun, but we do tend to get plenty of prank calls.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, do you have Far Cry 6?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, that game doesn’t exist, but Far Cry 4 does.”

Customer: “Oh, how about Mario on the Xbox one?”

Me:Mario is only on Nintendo products.”

Customer: “But my friend told me it was on Xbox.”

(Getting a little frustrated at this point, but I maintain my cool.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but your friend is wrong.”

Customer: “Okay, then, can I ask one more question?”

Me: “Sure.”

Customer: “Is this the Krusty Krab?”

(Without missing a beat.)

Me: “No, this is Patrick.”

(I hang up the phone immediately and my manager comes over.)

Manager: “Prank call?”

Me: “Yeah, you heard that?”

Manager: “Yes, and the end was brilliant.”

Call Of Duty For The Mushroom Kingdom

| NY, USA | Right | July 19, 2017

(A customer walks in with her three kids.)

Customer: “My one kid wants a shooting game like Call of Duty, but that’s rated for older kids. What’s a fun game for little kids?”

Me: “I recommend any of the Mario games; they’re all generally highly rated and well liked by children and adults.”

Customer: “Well do you have any Mario games with fighting or shooting?”

Me:Super Smash Bros. is a fighting game with a lot of cartoon characters from Mario as well as other series. It’s a game your children could play together.”

(Customer suddenly sees a “Wario” title for the Wii.)

Customer: “Wait, I want that. It’s Mario and war; it’s perfect.”

Me: “Umm, ma’am, that game, while fun, might not be what you are looking for. The ‘War’ in ‘Wario’ doesn’t actually have anything to do with war.”

Customer: “That can’t possibly be right; ring me up, please.”

Me: “…”

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