No Room For Jesus

, , , | Friendly | May 25, 2016

(A group of friends and myself are doing a medieval-themed escape-room where you have to solve puzzles to get out.)

Friend #1: *jokingly holding cross that was used as a hint at the video of a dragon we’re supposed to kill* “The power of Christ compels you!”

Friend #2: “Not even Jesus can save you now.”

Friend #1: “Well, that does make sense considering I’m Jewish.”

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Swing Low

, , , | Romantic | April 12, 2016

(I have been seeing a girl for a few months and am starting to introduce her to some of my female friends. One weekend we decide to head up to wine country and visit one of said friends, with whom I had mostly spent swinging on playgrounds and drinking tea to catch up. Just before she shows up…)

Me: “Okay, I think you’ll like her. We used to swing together.”

Girlfriend: “…WHAT?!”

Me: “Swing together! Swings, actual swings… Oh, God.” *hiding my face in embarrassment and feeling the urge to run away*

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I Weep At Your Ignorance

, , , , , , | Friendly | December 12, 2015

Friend: “Hey, what’s the name of the Beatles song? You know, the one where his guitar gently weeps?”

Me: “…While My Guitar Gently Weeps.”

Friend: “No, that doesn’t sound right.”


This story is part of our Beatles roundup!

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The Bat To End All Wars

, , , , | Friendly | September 10, 2015

(My friend is a well known WW2 buff. She is telling me a really cool story about a man who disguised himself as a Nazi and rescued a lot of Jews by doing so, when a bat flies past us. We love bats.)

Friend & Me: “Ooh, a bat!”

Friend: *pauses* “You know, that’s usually how it goes with me. Nazis, Nazis, Nazis, OOH, A BAT!”

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The Ring Doesn’t Rule Them All

, , , , | Friendly | March 4, 2015

(I am talking with a friend of mine at our live action role playing meeting.)

Me: “…so then we were going to do a Ravenloft thing but it never happened.”

Friend: “What’s Ravenloft? Is that another kingdom?”

(Chapters are referred to as shires, baronies, and duchies based on size. Kingdom represents an overseeing organization that handles rules, mundane business details, and other such things for multiple chapters.)

Me: “Umm, no, it’s a Dungeons and Dragons campaign setting.”

Friend: “Oh, hmm, I hadn’t heard of it. I don’t play D&D.”

Me: “Really? Do you read fantasy novels?”

Friend: “Not usually.”

Me: “You at least know who Tolkien is, right?”

Friend: “No, what Kingdom is he from?”

Me: “He wrote the Lord of the Rings, which sort of started the whole fantasy genre.”

Friend: “Oh.”

Me: “You mean this is the first fantasy thing you’ve done? You realize, this is near the deep end of geekdom right?”

(Since then he’s gotten heavily geeked out. Most recently, I’ve seen him cosplaying as Bebop from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.)

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