Magic Ink

, , | Right | March 29, 2010

(A client comes for her journalist portfolio. She shows me a picture of an architect in front of his building model, showing his back to the camera.)

Customer: “So, you see, I’d like you to flip this picture.”

Me: “Okay, that’s very simple.”

Customer: “Great! This will be awesome. I want him to face the camera.”

Me: “If I flip the picture, it will be all the same, but the guy will be on the left instead of the right, that’s it.”

Customer: “You can’t make him face us? You call yourself a professional?!”

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Why It Pays To Be Nice

, | Right | October 9, 2008

Me: “Good Afternoon, How may I help you?”

Customer: “I got my order today but you guys have billed something for 12 euro instead of 10 euro.”

Me: “I see that the calendar has been charged for 12 euro. What should it have been?”

Customer: “10 euro. The card says you pay 10 euro if it’s the third item you purchased out of the catalogue.”

Me: “Ma’am I can only see you purchased one item out of the catalogue. The other item was the special offer we gave on the phone so that is why the calendar cost 12 instead of 10 euro.”

Customer: “But they told me that I could get it for 10 euro! If I don’t, then cancel my whole subscription!”

Me: “Ma’am, I, unfortunately, cannot do anything about this. Those are the rules and they are clearly written on the card, as you can see.”

Customer: “Okay, fine then. I will pay the d*** bill and you can cancel my subscription!”

Me: “Alright, ma’am. I canceled the subscription. Have a nice day.”

Customer: “Bye!” *click*

Manager: “If she had stayed polite to you, we would have changed it for her, you know?”

Me: “Yeah, I know.”

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Gotta Love Those Magic Dongles

, , | Right | May 26, 2008

Me: “Welcome to the IT service desk. You’re talking to [My Name]. How may I help you today?”

User: “I can’t log on to VPN.”

Me: “Okay, how does the problem manifest itself?”

User: “I get a wrong user name or password error.”

Me: “Right. What’s the serial number of your VPN dongle?”

User: “Well, it keeps changing.”

Me: “…”

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