Not Bready For This Level Of Cheapness

, , , | Right | December 28, 2020

I am visiting Paris with my family and we’re eating in a little café. At the front of the café, they have bread samples.

As we’re eating, an old lady runs up to the sample tray and stuffs all of the bread into her purse.

Worker: “Why did you do that?!”

Old Lady: *In broken English* “It is free so I can take as much as I want!”

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The Polar Express Was Cancelled

, , , , , , , , | Right | December 24, 2020

The transportation strike has begun in France. I want to celebrate Christmas with my mom and dad, who live hundreds of kilometers away from me. It’s important for me because my dad is currently going through chemotherapy. My mom has to take care of him and I want to be with them for Christmas and give them all the moral support I can. I intend to take the train because I don’t own a car. Some French people don’t need them because our big cities have good networks of subways and buses.

Then, my train is cancelled. All the other trains are either full or cancelled. I try to search through carpooling websites but unfortunately, I have anxiety and going through these sites is too much for me. (Please, don’t laugh. I’m not weak; I just have a disability.) Moreover, I travel with my cat and a lot of carpoolers don’t accept animals. It seems like I’m going to spend Christmas away from my family this year. I’m very upset.

I mention my cancelled train in front of my coworkers at work. One of them tells me that her brother and his wife will be driving to the same place this weekend. She phones him and she tells me it’s okay; I can travel with her brother. They’re not even bothered by my kitty.

I meet her brother and his wife a few days later. They’re both incredibly nice people and they drop me with my cat at my parents’ door a few hours later. I try to make them accept money. They refuse and I eventually give them a box of chocolates. I will always be grateful to these wonderful people who allowed a person with special needs to spend Christmas with her very sick dad and her mom who really needed support.

This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for December 2020!

Read the next Feel Good roundup for December 2020 story!

Read the Feel Good roundup for December 2020!

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Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Judged By The Same Standard… Jerk

, , , , , , | Working | December 14, 2020

I do volunteer work in a food pantry, and it’s the day of the annual big lunch with the volunteers from the different food pantries of the department and the departmental headquarters.

During the preparation of the meal, there are, among others, our buyer, the person in charge of training courses, [Volunteer], and me.

Buyer: “What do you do?”

Me: “I prepare a meatless starter.”

Buyer: “Why? Are there vegetarian people here?”

Volunteer: “Yes, me.”

Buyer: “So, you are one of those people who break the windows of the butchers’ shops!”

We are shocked, but [Volunteer] and I are in our twenties and our buyer is in his sixties, and here, there is a “let’s respect our elders” mentality.

Volunteer: “No, I’m not one of the extremists.”

A little later, we are having lunch.

Buyer: “Ah, but the kick scooters, I don’t understand! It’s a means of transport for the bobos!”

The person in charge of the training courses is older than the buyer and is not a vegetarian.

Trainer: “So, it’s you who puts paint on the QR codes of the self-service electric kick scooters to prevent them from unlocking!

The media has been reporting these acts of vandalism.

Buyer: “Nonsense! Why do you say that?”

Trainer: “Since you thought that vegetarians were necessarily people who broke butchers’ windows, I thought that those who criticised the kick scooters were necessarily people who vandalised them.”

Our buyer stopped criticising vegetarians and people on scooters.

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Turning Into A Soap Opera, Part 4

, , , | Right | December 7, 2020

I work for a cosmetic brand and I am helping a woman choose between two different shower gels. She can’t decide between two scents. She is so uncertain that I show her the bar soap. She completely freezes and asks:

Customer: “But does it wash your body?”

Me: “Well, yes, it’s soap. It’s for the body.”

Customer: “But how do you use it?”

Me: *Puzzled* “You scrub your body with it.”

Customer: “But can I use it in the shower?”

Me: *More and more dismayed* “Well, yes! It is made for washing your body; it is soap! Where else would you want to use it?”

Turning Into A Soap Opera, Part 3
Turning Into A Soap Opera, Part 2
Turning Into A Soap Opera

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A Feminist On The Roof

, , , | Working | November 19, 2020

I live in an area where demossing roofs is necessary. I, a female, demoss every fall because my husband is afraid of heights. A man comes to the driveway while I’m outside.

Man: “Hello, ma’am, I’m selling my services to clean your roof.”

Me: “Oh, no, thank you.”

Man: “Ma’am, I already took a look from across the street and there is a lot of moss on your roof.”

There’s a little on the shady side but nothing bad at all.

Me: “It’s in fine shape, thank you.”

Man: “Listen. Your roof is atrocious; it really needs cleaning right away.”

He then hears my husband through an open window.

Man: “Oh, let me speak to your husband; he’ll know more about this than you.”

Me: “Nah, bye.”

And I walked back inside.

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