Wrecked Himself Before He Checked Himself

, , , , , , | Right | October 10, 2018

(We offer to cash checks in our store, provided the customer holds or signs up for a rewards membership and has a photo ID, and we have the cash to do so. This happens in the evening only an hour before we close.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I need to cash this check. Hurry up, though; I have to be somewhere.”

(I take a look at the check. It is for over $700, which is more than twice what I have available in my drawer. During the day we can get loans from the cash office, but as it’s quite late, I am not able to. )

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t have enough cash on hand to cash this.”

Customer: “Well, then, get it! You guys do it all the time!”

Me: “Again, sir, I’m sorry. But it’s too late for me to get a loan. You can take the check somewhere else to cash, or you can wait and see if we have the money tomorrow. It’s unlikely I will be able to cash it later tonight, as we close in an hour. You could also try tomorrow.”

Customer: “Man! The f*** is this?! Just give me my d*** money!”

Me: “Again, sir, I’m not able to. I have given you alternatives. Perhaps you can try [Grocery Store] across the street? They tend to have more on hand at this time of night.”

(The customer swears under his breath and leaves. He comes back five minutes later after I have helped two more customers.)

Customer: “You going to cash my check now?”

Me: “Again, sir, I don’t have enough. We close in less than an hour; I won’t be able to—”

(The customer leaves again. He then comes back AGAIN a few minutes later.)

Customer: “You got it yet?”

Me: “Sir, please, I will not be able to cash your check tonight! You can go somewhere else, or wait until tomorrow! You are asking me to do something I am literally unable to do.”

(By this point my manager has heard all of this and comes over. He asks to see the check and, despite it being against company policy, agrees to check and see if there is enough cash in the office to do the transaction. He asks the customer for ID.)

Customer: “I ain’t got no ID; that’s why I can’t go to [Check Cashing Store] or the bank! Now give me my money!”

(My manager makes him leave. The customer tries to resist, but my manager is about 6’5″ and very broad, built like a linebacker, and weighs at least 260 pounds.)

Manager: “You don’t feel bad about that one bit. You did good. Start closing up; maybe we can go home early tonight.”

(With that, he walked away, whistling. Just goes to show: don’t mess with retail workers!)

Refunder Blunder, Part 41

, , , , | Right | September 14, 2018

(I am working the returns desk on a busy shift. Our company’s return policy has recently changed and we can no longer do any refunds, exchanges, or store credits without a proof of purchase, and we can only do returns within 30 days.)

Customer: “I need to return this shirt; it doesn’t fit.”

Me: “Certainly, ma’am. May I see your receipt?”

Customer: *throws receipt at me* “Be quick about it. I’m in a hurry.”

(I notice her receipt is two days outside the return policy. Our system occasionally allows the return, so I try to scan it, anyway, but sure enough, it pops up, “Receipt date limit exceeded.”)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but you’re a few days past the return window. I will be unable to give you a refund on this item.”

Customer: “But it doesn’t fit! I can use this! Just give me a store credit, then!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but the system does not allow a return outside the date. I can’t even do a store credit or exchange.”

Customer: “This is f****** ridiculous! Manager! NOW!”

(I radio my manager, who arrives and, upon hearing the situation, repeats exactly what I have told the customer.)

Customer: “I shop here all the time! You’re really going to lose a customer over two days and $20?!”

Manager: “Ma’am, that’s how the system is. We can’t override it even if we want to.”

Customer: “I am never coming back! Your store is s***! I hope you go out of business!” *she storms out*

(The next customer shakes his head.)

Customer #2: “Most people would return the item as soon as they realize it doesn’t fit…” *hands me his receipt* “Can I return these shoes? They’re too big for my son.”

(I smile and complete his return with no issue.)

Customer #2: “I’m sure you’ll lose sleep over the couple hundred dollars she spends here in a year.”

Me: “I’ll try not to, sir.”

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 40
Refunder Blunder, Part 39
Refunder Blunder, Part 38

Walk A Mile In The Wrong Shoes

, , , , | Right | June 21, 2018

(I’m working the returns desk for a well-known retail chain. We have a strict return policy of 30 days, but we will sometimes bend the rules a bit if a customer is a bit outside the window. I am doing a return for an older female customer who is returning two separate orders.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, since it’s two transactions, I’ll have to do them separately; is that all right?”

Customer: “Yes, that’s okay. Do this one first; it’s older.”

Me: *thinking it’s a few weeks out* “Okay. Let me look at the receipt.”

(I see her receipt is missing the barcode and receipt ID number. Since the customer paid cash, I offer to look up the receipt with her store rewards card, which she agrees to.)

Me: “Hmm, it can’t find your item.”

(I glance at the receipt again and look at the date; the item was purchased over three years ago. Her other receipt was for the previous week.)

Me: “Um, ma’am, I cannot return this item, as it is way outside our return date window.”

Customer: “Oh, well, can’t you just bend the rules? Just this once?”

Me: “If it were a matter of a few days, I might be able to, but this item was purchased three years ago. I cannot take it back.”

Customer: “How about for store credit?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this rule is from our corporate office, and I cannot do any sort of refund or exchange, even for store credit.”

Customer: “But I never used it!”

Me: “I understand, but that is the rule. The computer won’t even find your purchase outside of the return date window. I can do your other return, as it is still in date, but not this one.”

Customer: “But I never used it! Just give me store credit!”

Me: “Again, ma’am, I cannot give you any refund or exchange for this—”

Customer: “BUT I NEVER USED IT! THIS IS RIDICULOUS! I can’t wear these shoes; they don’t fit!”

(The man behind her in line has had enough.)

Customer #2: *mumbling* “And it took you three years to figure that out?”

([Customer] immediately shuts up and lets me do her other return. She is still screaming about “never using” her item as she leaves. I turn to help the next customer.)

Customer #2: “Are people really that stupid?”

Me: “I wish I could say that was a first, sir.”

Reward Points Are Their Own Reward

, , , , , | Right | October 5, 2017

(I am the only employee cashiering in my section.)

Me: “Are you a member of our rewards program?”

Customer #1: “NO! And I don’t want to be! Your rewards are s***!”

Me: “Okay, then.”

(I continue ringing her up. As I hit “total,” the register tells me that one of her items is on member special. I am required to tell her this.)

Me: “Ma’am, just so you know, if you sign up for our free rewards program, you can save [percentage] on this item.”

Customer #1: “I told you I didn’t want it!” *under her breath* “Stupid b****.”

Me: “Okay, your total is [amount]. Have a good day.”

(The next customer hands me her rewards card. The previous customer is apparently waiting for someone and is still in the shop.)

Me: *to [Customer #2]* “And because you’re a rewards member, you did get the member special, and you’ll get a coupon for gas savings. Your total is [amount].”

Customer #2: “Oh, go ahead and use my points.”

Me: “Sure.”

(The customer has over a hundred dollars in points, so this takes care of her whole purchase.)

Me: “And that paid for your purchase! Have a good one!”

Customer #1: “HEY! How come hers is free?! That’s discrimination! I want mine free! Get me your manager, you b****!”

Customer #2: “If you hadn’t been screaming at her and being rude, you would have heard her say that signing up for the membership would save you money! And they always tell you that the points are money! Why don’t you get the f*** out and leave that poor girl alone? She works hard enough without some moron like you ruining her day!”

(The first customer mumbled something under her breath and left. The second customer just smiled as she left. Wherever you are, ma’am, thank you!)

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