Customer: “I need a flower arrangement that says, ‘I’m sorry for sleeping with your best friend.’”
I start looking around the store.
Customer: “You don’t know where it is?”
Me: “No, I’m just tallying up how much it would cost you to buy our entire stock.”
I own a flower shop, and this has led to a few difficulties making deliveries where buildings are locked up due to health crisis restrictions, but until this point, everything has made sense and just caused a few delays. My mom is making a delivery to the Secretary of State building when she is met with true idiocracy. There is a woman standing outside of the building checking people in, whom my mom approaches.
Mom: “Hello, I have a delivery for [SOS Employee].”
Clerk: “Do you have an appointment?”
Mom: “No, but I don’t need anything from you. I just received an order for [Employee] that I need to drop off.”
Clerk: “I can’t let you in without an appointment.”
Mom: “That’s all right, I don’t need to go in, if you wouldn’t mind taking these in for [Employee]. They were ordered today for her birthday.”
Clerk: “Everyone needs an appointment. We cannot help you without one.”
Mom: “This order was just placed today. There was no way for me to make an appointment to drop them off. Could you just take them inside to [Employee]? They’re for her birthday today.”
She holds out the flowers for the woman to take.
Clerk: “You should have planned ahead and made an appointment.”
Mom: “So, should I just make appointments every day just in case I have to make a delivery? I think that would be a waste of everyone’s time to schedule appointments when I dont know if I have a delivery.”
Clerk: “No, you can not make an appointment unless you need to do business here.”
Mom: “Are you not allowed to receive deliveries here at all? Is that why you can’t take these inside for [Employee]?”
Clerk: “For the last time, you need an appointment in order for me to help you.”
Mom: “Is there a supervisor I can talk to? I don’t think you are listening to me.”
Clerk: “I will not go get anyone else. They will just tell you the same thing.”
Mom: “Listen. For the last time, I do not need help. I just have a delivery for [Employee]. I should not need an appointment to just drop off something for her birthday.”
At this point, she glances into the empty office, makes eye contact with someone else behind the desk, and waves at her. The woman starts to head out to see what is going on.
Clerk: “I said we are not going to bother my supervisor. She won’t let you in without an appointment, either.”
The supervisor comes out a few seconds later.
Supervisor: “Is there something I can help you with?”
Mom: “Yes, I have a delivery for [Employee].” *Holds out the flowers*
Supervisor: “Oh, how beautiful! They must be for her birthday. She is out for lunch right now but, I will make sure she gets them when she gets back.”
Mom: “Thanks, have a great day.
As my mom is walking away, she hears:
Clerk: “She didn’t have an appointment.”
Supervisor: “Why would she need an appointment just to drop off flowers?”
I work as a florist/gardener. A lady comes in to get a small tree for her garden.
Customer: “How many leaves does this tree lose in autumn?”
Me: “I’m not sure.”
Customer: “Well, can you count them?”
Me: “…no.”
I own a flower shop and get several orders going to a funeral service. I call the funeral home to arrange for delivery, and someone I do not recognize answers the phone.
Me: “It’s [My Name] from [Flower Shop]. Can you let me know when and where you need the flowers delivered for [Deceased Man]?”
New Employee: “Yeah, umm, the family will be arriving at 9:00 am next Friday, so as close to that as possible after you open.”
Me: “Well, if the family is going to be there at 9:00, would it be better if I delivered the flowers the night before so you have time to set up before the family arrives?”
New Employee: “Oh, that’s a better idea, thanks.”
Me: “No problem. I’ll probably deliver them after I close at 5:00 on Thursday.”
New Employee: “Actually, could you deliver them before 4:00? That’s when [Regualar Employee] leaves for the day.”
Me: “I’ll see what I can do. If we have everything done by then, sure.”
New Employee: “Thanks, that would be great. Otherwise, I’ll have to deal with it.”
My anniversary with my husband fell on a weekday this year, and we decided to celebrate it over the weekend rather than try to plan something on a work night. However, on the day of our anniversary, he wanted to surprise me with flowers, so he called the florist the morning of to place an order to be picked up on his way home from work. This is the conversation that occurred as he relayed to me.
Florist: “Hello, how can I help you?”
Husband: “Hello, I’d like to order a bouquet to be picked up today.”
Florist: “Sure. What kind of bouquet do you need?”
Husband: “One with roses and stargazer lilies, please.”
Florist: “No, I mean what level of bouquet? What kind of bouquet do you need?”
My husband is confused, unsure what she means.
Husband: “Um, a nice one? It’s for my wife.”
Florist: “Yes, but what is the bouquet for?”
Husband: “It’s for our anniversary?”
Florist: “Did you forget it?”
Suddenly, it clicks in his mind that the florist thinks he’s in trouble and the flowers are meant to be an apology, and he starts laughing.
Husband: “Oh, no, it’s today; I’m surprising her with flowers.”
Florist: “Oh! Okay, great! Usually, when someone places a rush order, it’s because they’re in trouble. So, you said roses and stargazer lilies?”
The bouquet was gorgeous, and I was very surprised when my husband came home with flowers, but I almost laughed myself to tears at the story that came along with it.
