This Order Is Deceased

, , , , , | | Working | July 12, 2019

(I work in a funeral home so I deal with the flower shops pretty regularly. We are the only funeral home in town and there are only three flower shops, but we only have problems with this specific one, for some reason. That being said, it takes at most ten minutes to get from one side of town to the other, so, at most, it should take ten minutes to get from this flower shop to the funeral home if they manage to hit every single red light. According to my boss, this flower shop had called the day before asking when to bring the flowers over. It has ALWAYS been no later than an hour before. A coworker had answered and stressed that the flowers be at the funeral home no later than 9:30 for the service at 10:30, which my boss had heard her say. It is 9:45 and the flowers haven’t shown up. I give them a call.)

Employee: “[Flower Shop], this is [Employee].”

Me: “Hey, [Employee]! This is [My Name] with the funeral home. I was wondering when you would be here with the flowers for [Deceased]’s service?”

Employee: “Oh! They left about fifteen minutes ago, so they should be there in a few minutes.”

Me: “All righty, then. Thanks.”

(It seems weird that they were leaving at the time they had been told to bring the flowers, and that it is going to take them TWENTY MINUTES to get here. I let my boss know, since the family has started trickling in. She’s, of course, ticked. Thirty minutes later, however, the flowers still aren’t here. I go call them again since the service is starting in fifteen minutes and I need to let them know to take the flowers to the reception instead of the funeral home.)

Employee: “[Flower Shop].”

Me: “Hi, it’s me again with the funeral home. We still haven’t gotten the flowers yet for [Deceased]’s service.”

Employee: “What? We don’t have any flowers for any services this week. Haven’t gotten any requests.”

Me: “What? I just called you a half-hour ago and you said you were on your way.”

Employee: “Let me check.”

(I can hear the conversation in the background, saying there haven’t been any flower requests for that service.)

Employee: “Sorry, we don’t have any flowers for [Deceased].”

Me: “Okay, then. Thanks.”

(I went back and let my boss know. We are still all confused as to why the flower shop had called to ask about delivering flowers and told us they were on their way if they didn’t have anything for it.)

Excessive Demands Are Flowering

, , | Right | January 16, 2019

(I work in a floral shop. It is prom season, and the store is filled with teenagers and their families picking up their corsages and boutonnieres for the dance. Due to the many stacks in the coolers, they are not allowed to reach in and grab one. We will get their items for them and take them to the register ourselves for them to pay.)

Me: “Okay, that will be [price].”

Customer: “Oh, I didn’t bring money; I just came to pick it up.”

Me: “I’m sorry, it has not been paid for yet, so I will need payment before you leave the store with it.”

Customer: “No, it’s for my niece. I’m just getting it for her.”

Me: “I understand. However, it is store policy that orders must be paid for before they are picked up.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! You’re not going to give it to me?! I own a business right down the road! I can come back with the money later.”

Me: “I cannot let you take a product before it is paid for. It’s store policy, especially during such a busy time. If you are going to have to come back with the money later, it’s no trouble for us to hold it for you in our cooler.”

(She left the store ranting about how I would not let her take the flowers without paying for them and how she’d never do business with us again. Her niece came in a bit later and paid for them with no trouble. After that lady’s outburst, I avoided her business until she ended up having to close it down the following year.)

Your Service Is Of Grave Concern

, , , , , | Working | October 16, 2017

(A relative in another state has passed away. My part of the family can’t make the funeral, but an elderly relative asks me to help him order flowers. I call a national florist chain five days before the funeral. I get a wonderful, helpful rep who helps me pick out the flowers my relative wants, and I even pay extra to have the flowers delivered on a Sunday, the morning of the funeral. One hour before the funeral, I get an automated call saying there was a problem with the order and it will not be delivered. I call the number but get no answer, just a recorded message asking me to leave a message at the beep. I get a call back THAT EVENING, hours after the funeral ends. The rep calling apologizes and comes up with some story that they didn’t have the flowers I ordered to even make the basket. He offers to deliver flowers on the next day to the gravesite, instead. I tell him no thanks; I wanted flowers for the funeral. I demand my money back. I am told I have to call customer service on Monday. I do.)

Customer Service: “Yes, ma’am. I am sorry, but we do not deliver on Sunday so—”

Me: “They why did your rep not only promise me he would, but also charged me extra for Sunday delivery?”

Customer Service: “Yeah, I don’t know. But I can have flowers delivered to the gravesite.”

Me: “No. The funeral was yesterday. I wanted them for the funeral. I paid you for a service, and you failed to provide the service. The reason is irrelevant. So, I want my money back.”

Customer Service: “Well now, instead, I can give you a discount on your next order and we will send a nice fruit bouquet to a family member. How about—”

Me: “No, I do not want fruit. I paid you extra to have flowers delivered to a funeral on a Sunday. You have failed to do so; therefore, I want my money back.”

(He starts trying to pass off a partial refund, trying to tell me that he still had to pay for the flowers and the employees. I tell him that’s not my problem and that his employee has already admitted that they didn’t even have the flowers. I keep repeating that I paid for a product, I did not get it, and I want my money back. After more BS, I tell him to forget it; I will call my bank and report this as fraud. He is not happy at all, and tries to cop an attitude with me. I hang up and call the bank. It turns out this national company has A LOT of complaints just like mine; they pull this all the time. I call to file a complaint with the Better Business Bureau, and am told that the company has been thrown out due to the large number of complaints. They have a 98% negative rating on most online sites. They sell huge arrangements, like for funerals and weddings, don’t deliver, and then try to pass on cheap fruit arrangements to the customers. I am afraid to tell my elderly relative what happened.)

Relative: *sighs* “Well, it serves me right.”

Me: “What ever do you mean?”

Relative: “I should have sent a donation to his favorite charity instead. That’s what he would have wanted. Not stupid flowers.”

(We did end up sending double the amount we would have paid for the flowers to a worthy charity. I think it ended as it should.)

Old Age Is No Reason

| Oslo, Norway | Right | May 27, 2017

Customer: “I want to return this plant. It suddenly died for no reason. I want my money back.”

Manager: “I’m sorry about that. Do you have a receipt?”

Customer: “No, but I know I bought it here.”

Manager: “Okay, when did you buy it?”

Customer: “Eight years ago.”

I’m So Tolerant I Can’t STOP Talking About It!

| Cedar Rapids, IA, USA | Right | March 27, 2017

(I work in a flower shop. It’s shortly after Valentine’s Day, so we’re all recovering from the rush. I’m a woman in my twenties.)

Customer: “So, did you and your husband do anything for Valentine’s Day?”

Me: “I had to work, but my partner understands. I sent flowers and we had dinner when I got home.”

Customer: “Oh, is that what we have to say now? ‘Partner?’ Not ‘husband’ or ‘wife’?”

Me: *a little annoyed* “Well, considering I’m gay and I don’t always feel like outing myself to random strangers, yes.”

Customer: “Ha, sure. You know, we’re having training at my job for that. We have to use different words. Gotta make sure we don’t offend anyone who’s not heterosexual.” *laughs*

Me: “Mm.”

Customer: “You know, I’m fine with it.”

Me: “Okay, good.”

Customer: “As long as you’re happy.”

Me: “I am.”

Customer: “You should go to San Francisco. They’re so tolerant there. It’s crazy.”

Me: “…uh-huh.”

Customer: “So liberal. I mean, it’s insane. They kiss in public there and everything. The first time I saw that, I was like, ‘What the h***?!’ I couldn’t believe it! In public!”

Me: “…”

Customer: “You really should go there. You’d love it. You’d fit right in.”

Me: “Have a nice day, sir…”

(Whatever his training was, I think that customer needed remedial classes.)

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