Some Passive Aggressiveness Is On The Menu

| GA, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Popular

(I am a kitchen manager for a popular donut chain and often work the drive-thru window taking orders. It seems people don’t know that prices were on the menu board.)

Me: “America runs on [Restaurant]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “How much is [food item]?”

Me: “Just a second; let me check.”

(I walk out the back door and stand between the customer in her car and the menu board and look at the price. While still standing there I push the button on my headset and say:)

Me: “It’s [price]. Would you like a coffee with that?”

(When I got back inside, the store manager, who also had a headset on, was dying laughing. When the lady got to the window she never said a word.)


A Day When Everyone Is Fired

| OR, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I work at a fast food restaurant. Right after we open I start smelling something burning. Our building is on fire, and being from a small town four fire trucks show up. The three employees are outside with the fire trucks while firefighters are spraying the building. A lady goes around all the trucks and parks cockeyed in front of the drive-thru, which it is partially blocked by a truck.)

Me: “Ma’am… did you not happen to see the fire trucks you went around?”

Customer: “Yeah… so?”

Me: “Obviously we aren’t open… We have a fire.”

Customer: *yelling* “How am I supposed to get my food?!”

Me: “I’m sorry… I can’t go into our building while it’s on fire… and it’s going to be a while before I can cook anything.”

(She took off yelling at me because she didn’t get her food.)


Making You Feel Down About The Upgrade

| Pensacola, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Popular

(As a manager at this restaurant known for it’s square meat and ice cream desserts, it’s my job to keep the pace fast and satisfy our customers. This happened as our dinner rush was nearing the end.)

Cashier: “Welcome to [Restaurant]. May I take your order?”

Customer #1: “Yes, I’d like a large chocolate ice cream and a small vanilla.”

(Cashier tells them the total and takes their money. Sometimes when it gets busy, we make mistakes. I accidentally upgraded her vanilla into a large. Thinking she’d be happy, I open the window and start giving her her dessert.)

Me: “Ma’am, I accidentally upgraded your dessert. However, you weren’t charged for it! I do apologize.”

Customer #1: “Just means more ice cream for me!”

(So I smile, wish her a nice day, and close my window to go and bag the next order. As I open the window, expecting the next customer, I’m surprised to see my last customer.)

Me: “Is something wrong?”

Customer #1: “Where is my small vanilla ice cream?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer #1: My small vanilla! You never gave it to me!

Me: “Ma’am, you were upgraded to a bigger size.”

Customer #1: “I want my damn ice cream! You’re trying to rip me off!!”

(I finally lose my patience as she is destroying my fast drive times and hold my hand out.)

Me: “Ma’am, you obviously don’t appreciate the free upgrade. I’ll take that large vanilla and replace it with a small.”

(Realizing I’m not backing down or giving her more free ice cream, she gives a fake smile and tries to make herself likable again.)

Customer #1: “It was a free upgrade? I’m so sorry, dear; I don’t know what came over me!”

(She finally pulls off, and the next customer pulls up.)

Customer #2: “My gosh! You’d think people would be happy with a free upgrade! Are all your nights like this?”

Me: “There’s always that one person…”


Milked Them Empty

| NE, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I am at the drive-thru. A regular customer comes through and this is always how it goes:)

Customer: *at the speaker* “Can I get two small coffees and [other items]?”

Me: “Okay, that’ll be [total] at the window.”

(At the window:)

Customer: “Can I get, like, six cream and six sugars?”

(I hand him six packets each of cream and sugar.)

Customer: “Can I get six packets for each coffee?”

(I hand him six more packets each. Yes, I’m being passive-aggressive about this, but please remember, this is twelve creams and twelve sugars for two small cups of coffee! Today, however, we’ve run out of creamer for some odd reason.)

Customer: *at the window* “Can I get like, six cream and six sugars?”

(I hand him the sugar but, being passive-aggressive, don’t mention the cream.)

Customer: “Where’s my cream?”

Me: “Sorry, we’ve run out of creamer. Someone’s been asking for twelve creams per order.”

Customer: “Well, this is a business. Maybe you should order some more!”

(He threw the sugar at me and drove off angrily. Later, he came inside and complained to my manager, saying – among other things – that it “isn’t my business” how much cream he asks for (even, apparently, when it runs us out of cream). My manager gave him a free bottle of milk for his trouble and lectured me on not criticizing customers. I still feel like it was worth it. Maybe I’m wrong?)


Trying To Bowl Them Over With Common Sense

| TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Popular, Wild & Unruly

(One popular food item at our shop is a bowl with a foil lid. When the bowl is finished, the employees put the lid on top and fold the foil so it stays in place. The customer can carry the bowl out as-is, or carry it in a bag. However, our store has just run out of the bags. We have other, smaller bags for a different type of item, but the bowls don’t fit them well and it has been causing some problems, especially if they are carried upright. I’ve asked my manager if I can just tell customers that we are out of bags, but they have requested that I just warn customers about these problems every time a customer asks for a bag, and give them one of the smaller ones if they still insist. Despite these warnings several other customers have already spilled their bowls all over the floor, becoming so frequent that I have been keeping a broom and mop at the ready right behind the register to deal with it.)

Me: “…and here’s your receipt. Have a great night!”

Customer #1: “Can I have a bag?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. Unfortunately we are out of the bag that fits these bowls right now. I do have—”

Customer #1: *cutting me off and pointing to the smaller bags* “One of those! A bag! I want one.”

Me: “I do have these bags, but they’re too small. The bowl will only fit sideways, and it has a tendency to squeeze the sides and pop the lid off, which will—”

Customer #1: *clearly getting irate, she reaches over the counter, grabs a folded bag from the top of the stack, and opens it* “I just wanted a bag!”

Me: “Yes, you can have that bag, but please be careful because it’s too tight. It might pop the lid off and spill your bowl. You’ll have to hold it sideways so that won’t happen, okay? Again, I’m very sorry.”

Customer #1: *trying and failing repeatedly to fit the bowl into the bag horizontally* “It doesn’t fit!”

Me: *I can tell the customer hasn’t been listening, so I make sure to reiterate now that she’s recognized that something isn’t normal* “Yes, they can be tricky, since those aren’t the bags for the bowls. It has to go in on its side. You’ll have to carry it like this, okay? Otherwise it will pop the lid off and your bowl will spill. Sorry again, and have a great night.”

Customer #1: “Ugh!”

(The customer grabs the bag by the top and yanks it out of my hands, causing it to become vertical. The lid immediately pops off, and the weight of the ingredients quickly ruptures the bottom of the now sauce-soaked paper bag, spilling all over the counter and the floor.)

Customer #1: “WHAT THE F***?”

Me: “Uh oh! I’m sorry that happened, ma’am. If you’d like to jump right up to the front of the line there, they can make you a fresh bowl on the house.”

(I quickly wipe down the counter and start sweeping up the mess. Hearing the customer yelling, my manager starts walking up to the register.)


Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, it’s just those bags. You’ll have to hold them sideways or the lid will pop off.”


Manager: “Ma’am, I’m going to have to ask you to stop swearing in front of the other guests, please. What seems to be the matter here?”


Manager: “[My Name], why does this keep happening? I told you to warn customers about the bags!”

Me: *already finished mopping, put up a wet floor sign, ready to take the next customer* “Yes. sir, I did.”


(The next customer in line speaks up.)

Customer #2: “Lady, he warned you, like, three times.”

Customer #1: “HE DID NOT!”

Me: “I promise you, sir, I’ve been warning every single person who gets a bag for a bowl.”

Manager: “Then how does this keep happening?”

Me: “Um…”

(I start frantically trying to think of the politest possible way to say that some people don’t listen.)

Customer #2: “Some people don’t listen!”

Customer #1: “THEY’RE BOTH F****** LYING!”

Manager: “I’m sorry, ma’am, please watch your language. If you’d like to skip to the front of the line we can get you another bowl on us.”


Me: “If you don’t want a replacement, I’d be happy to refund your money for you if you’d like.”

Customer #1: *starts pushing other customers out of the way to run up and down the counter, shoving her finger in all the other workers’ faces* “YOU HEAR THAT? YOU’RE ALL GETTING FIRED! EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU! ESPECIALLY YOU!”

(She ends by pointing to me, and then runs out the door, without any food or a refund.)

Me: *to manager* “Say, boss, can I please just tell customers they can’t have a bag for a bowl because we’re out?”

Manager: *sighing deeply* “Please do.”

Me: “And can I do a customer appreciation comp?”

Manager: “Sure.”

Me: “Thanks.” *to [Customer #2]* “Any drinks for you tonight with your food?”

Customer #2: “No, thanks. And no bag, either!”

Me: “All right, then, your total will be zero dollars. Have a nice night!”

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