Pranks For Breakfast

, | Wheat Ridge, CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I’m 16, working in McDonald’s over the summer, and for this particular shift I’m taking orders in the drive-thru. It’s about three in the afternoon.)

Me: “Welcome to McDonald’s. What can I get for you?”

Customer: “I’ll have an Egg McMuffin.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, that’s one of our breakfast items, and we stopped serving breakfast at 10:30.”

Customer: “Okay, I’ll just have some hash browns.”

Me: “Sadly, that’s another breakfast item.”

Customer: “Hot cakes!”

Me: “Breakfast item again, sir.”

Customer: “Okay, I’ll have a Whopper with cheese.”

Me: “I’d be happy to serve you one of those, but they’re sold at the Burger King a block down the road. We have Big Macs.”

Customer: “I’ll just have a drink. Medium Frosty, please.”

Me: “And for that, you’ll have to go to the Wendy’s across the street. We just have regular milkshakes.”

Customer: “Medium Coke, then.”

Me: “Lovely! That’ll be $1.08. Please pull around to the first window.”

(I used the moment it took the car to pull around to take a deep breath before I turned to take the customer’s money, and saw him looking back at me with the biggest grin ever, laughing at himself.)

Me: “Hi, Dad.”

Buy One, Get One Free a From Thought

, | Canada | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(A customer presents me with a buy one get one free for a burger.)

Customer: “How much would this come to?”

Me: “That’s [price].”

Customer: “Okay, and how much would it be if I didn’t use the coupon and only got one burger?”

Me: *That’s [same price].”

Customer: “But how come it’s the same price?”

Stupidity That Defies Explanation

, | London, England, UK | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Money

(I work in a fast food restaurant as a cashier. A grumpy old man approaches my counter with a voucher.)

Me: “Good morning. How can I help?”

Customer: “I’ll have a bacon and egg muffin with a coffee, and I have a voucher.”

(I take the voucher and ring it up at the discounted price.)

Me: “That’ll be £1.99, please.”

Customer: “What?” *complete with a puzzled/angry expression*

Me: “That’ll cost you one pound and 99 pence, sir.”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “…I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I want to use this voucher, for a free coffee.”

Me: “Yes, with the voucher that costs £1.99.”

Customer: “No, no.”

Me: “Yes, it does, sir. The voucher is for a ‘free coffee with the purchase of a muffin.’ The bacon egg muffin is £1.99, and that’s all you’re paying so the coffee is free.”

Customer: “NO, I want a BACON AND EGG MUFFIN, and I want to use this voucher for a free coffee.”

Me: *at a loss for words* “Well… yeah, that’s fine, but it will cost you £1.99.”

Customer: “No, I’m not following you. You’ve lost me.”

Me: “Okay. You want a bacon egg muffin, and a coffee, yeah?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “Right, and you have a voucher. It says if you BUY a muffin, the coffee is free, yeah?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “Okay. So you must buy the muffin, which costs £1.99—”

Customer: “—no! I want to use the voucher.”

Me: “I’m sorry but I can’t explain it any more simply than that. The voucher says you need to buy a muffin to get a free coffee.”

Customer: “You’ve lost me; I want to speak to someone else.”

(I find my manager, who comes to my aid.)

Manager: “Hi, what was it you wanted?”

Customer: “I want a bacon and egg muffin and a coffee with this voucher!”

Manager: “Okay that’ll be £1.99 please.”

(The customer hands over £1.99 with no qualms! I can finally serve the idiot.)

Customer: *in a condescending tone* “That wasn’t difficult now, was it?”

Me: *in an even more condescending tone* “Nope, it really wasn’t.”