Giving You A Heart Attack With A Heart Attack

, | Dayton, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

(I am working the drive through with the manager.)

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Store]. Would you like to try [new sandwich]?”

Customer: “OH, MY GOD! ARE YOU TRYING TO GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK?!”

(I jumped, scared by the customer’s volume. Meanwhile, my manager was laughing, as she recognized her boyfriend in the drive-through. The rest of the order went smoothly.)

Will Always Find A Way To Get Hot And Bothered

, | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I work as a manager at a fast food restaurant and sometimes I deal with incredibly strange ‘complaints.’)

Me: “[Restaurant], [My Name] speaking. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, I just got home from coming through your drive-thru and my chicken is too hot.”

Me: “…Too hot as in ‘spicy’ hot, or ‘heat’ hot?”

Caller: “Heat.”

Me: “Uh. Okay, it’s supposed to be hot.”

Caller: “That’s why I’m calling. The chicken’s too hot.”

Me: “I’m not sure I follow. What is it exactly that you want me to do for you?”

Caller: “Well, the chicken’s too hot.”

Me: “Okay, is it too hot because it’s been sitting in the warmers for too long or because it’s fresh?”

Caller: “No, it’s fresh. It was actually quite nice. Very juicy, too.”

Me: “Yeah…?”

Caller: “So, what are you going to do about it?”

Me: “What do you WANT me to do about it?”

Caller: “Okay, you know what? You’re so unhelpful. Give me the number to your head office; I’m filing an official complaint.”

Me: “Uh, okay, ma’am. The number is [head office number].”

Caller: “You’ll be hearing from me again soon!” *click*

Upgraded Complaints

, | MT, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I used to work at the local big-name ice cream and burger restaurant eight years ago. The night shift lead is the owner’s son that was just a little runt when I worked there. On this trip through the drive thru I order a small ice cream cone for me and a blended drink for my husband. We get the drink, but while the cashier is taking another order he opens the window:)

Shift Lead: “So, she accidentally made a large cone instead of a small one. Is that still okay?”

Me: *I raise an eyebrow and scoff dramatically* “No! It. Is. Not. Okay! You are giving me more for my money and it’s just unacceptable!”

Shift Lead: *grinning and handing me the cone* “Gosh darn us for giving you a free upgrade, right?”

Me: “Gripe, gripe, gripe. Obligatory threat to complain to your father, young man!”

Shift Lead: *laughing* “Yeah, you have a good night, too!”