They Were Just Wingin’ It

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Working | October 30, 2016

(I like buffalo wings, a lot. This fast food place has a 12-piece, 24-piece, and 48-piece options. I order 36 wings. The kid rings me up and tells me the price, which seems awfully high according to the board prices above and behind him.)

Me: “Why so much?”

Cashier: “We don’t have a 36-piece option, so I charged you for the 48.”

Me: “But you DO have a 24-piece option, and a 12-piece option. Doesn’t that make 36 total?”

(He stared at me a minute, then canceled the order and redid it, all without a word.)

They All Come Out On Halloween

| Port St Lucie, FL, USA | Right | October 30, 2016

(It is seven am, Halloween morning, during the start of our breakfast rush. We park two cars, one for a large order and one for two hash browns.)

Employee: *comes back inside after bringing the two bags out to the cars* “I think you guys handed me the wrong order. The woman gave me a receipt for a large order but the man said he didn’t have two hash browns either. The man stuck the bag with the big order between his legs. I asked for the receipt and food but he wouldn’t give me either.”

Man: *on cue* “I want my f****** food! I got the wrong order!”

Employee: “I was trying to get the receipt, sir, but can we get the bag back?”

Man: *in a smug tone* “Oh, bite me.”

Me: “Okay, sir; just let me see your receipt and I will gladly get it to you.”

Man: “I JUST WANT MY F****** FOOD!”

Me: “I understand, sir. I can go ahead and print the receipt for you if you’d like. Just let me know what items you had and I can get it for you.”

Man: “Are you f****** kidding me? JUST GIVE ME MY FOOD!”

Me: “Sir, I will. I just need to know what you had so I can get it for you.”

Man: “This is f****** stupid. You won’t give me my food!” *stomps out of the store, never bringing the bag with the wrong order back*

Woman: *comes inside* “I’ve been waiting for my order for a while now.”

Me: *utterly perplexed* “I… I believe that man just left with your food. But don’t worry, ma’am, I’ve got it for you.”

Thankfully Not On Your ‘High’ Horse

, | OH, USA | Working | October 28, 2016

(I decide to get lunch at Popular Fast Food Restaurant. I walk in and stand waiting to order for five minutes, with no one at the counter. I have brightly dyed hair.)

Cashier: *speed walks from outside to behind counter* “I’m so sorry, miss. I didn’t see you there!”

Me: “It’s okay.” *places order*

Cashier: “I like your hair, I’ve always wanted to do mine red, white, and blue because that would be f***ing awesome, but they won’t let us do it here.”

Me: “Yeah, I work for [Locally-Owned Pizza Shop] and technically we aren’t supposed to have dyed hair, but they don’t really care as long as it goes under your hat.”

Cashier: “Well, technically we aren’t supposed to smoke marijuana, but I’m still high right now.”

(Moment of silence, he gets an ‘oh s**t’ look on his face.)

Me: “Me too, man. Me too.”

(He let out a sigh of relief and gave me a high five and a free milkshake.)

Customer, Interrupted

| Winnipeg, MT, Canada | Working | October 28, 2016

(I am at a popular burger chain. The lineup to give orders is fairly long, and while I am waiting I keep rehearsing my order in my head so that I can rattle it off fairly quickly.)

Employee: “What would you like?”

Me: “I’d like a [Burger] with—”

Employee: *interrupting* “Would you like fries with that?”

Me: “Yes, please. I’d like—”

Employee: “What size?”

Me: “Large, and—”

Employee: “What would you like to drink?”

Me: “Just water, please, and—”

Employee: “Is that for here or to go?”

Me: *sigh* “To go.”

Home Is Where The Joke Is

| USA | Working | October 27, 2016

(I work at a popular fast food restaurant. My GM has a good sense of humor. Running drive-thru one day with her, this exchange happens.)

General Manager: “Hello, may I take your order, please?”

Customer: “Give us just a moment, please”.

(A couple minutes go by.)

Customer: “Are you still there?”

General Manager: “Nope, we went home!”

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