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Let Me Tell You Where You Can Shove It

, , , | Right | September 7, 2021

I work as a cashier at a food shop where you order and pay at the counter and then wait outside for your food. We have the customers insert their own cards in the card reader, but they don’t always see the correct slot, meaning they usually try putting the chip in where you’re supposed to swipe instead of the actual chip reader. Most of the time, this doesn’t cause any issues when I point it out; the customer will just laugh and put their card in the right slot.

Me: “Oh! It’s actually gonna be this slot.”

I point at the slot with my finger right above it.

Customer: “What?!”

He sets the card on top of the reader. I keep trying to show him where to actually put his card and his daughter even tries helping out. He cannot figure it out. He even turns his card to the side as if to swipe but instead of swiping, he tries inserting it just like that.

Eventually, I just ask for his card, insert it myself, and then hand it back.

Customer: “That’s where I had it the first time.”

Because I’ve worked in customer service for six years, I just smiled and finished the transaction without saying anything, but oh, my god, our readers scan the cards so fast, I know you didn’t have your card there to begin with.

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Their Bark Is Worse Than Your Bites

, , , , | Right | September 6, 2021

I work in a pretzel shop; we make soft pretzels and soft pretzel bites. It is in a mall, so occasionally we get quite busy. I have a couple in the store and the husband tells me they want a box of bites with garlic and parmesan on them. Both he and his wife watch me make their order, and then they pay and leave.

About ten minutes later, the wife comes back and cuts in front of at least six people.

Customer: “This order is wrong.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Can you tell me how I can fix it?”

Customer: “I need plain bites; my kids don’t eat this garlic and stuff.”

Me: “I apologize, but you and the man you were with ordered a box of garlic and parmesan.”

Customer: “Why can’t you just give me plain bites?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but could I have you wait in line to make a new order if you want plain bites? We have quite a few customers waiting.”

Customer:No! I was a customer I will wait right here!”

I am trying to finish up other orders while hoping she understands that she needs to wait.

Customer: “Why can’t you just give me three or four plain bites?”

Me: “You want three bites?”

Customer: “Yes, I will not leave until I get what my kids will eat!”

I literally put three bites — each bite is about an inch by an inch, so this is ridiculous— into a cup and handed it to her. She stomped away saying she was going to report me.

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Not Even In Line And Out Of Line, Part 3

, , , , | Right | September 1, 2021

I work drive-thru at a fast food restaurant, and we’ve been drive-thru only since the start of lockdown. We’re slammed as usual, and the phone starts ringing. My manager is busy getting orders out, so as a senior employee, I answer it.

Caller: “Hi, this is [Third-Party Delivery App]. I’m in the parking lot; can you just bring the order out so I don’t have to wait in line?”

Me: “[Delivery App] waits in line like everybody else. Have a nice day.”

I immediately hung up on him, shaking my head. Does the guy really think that any of us have time to run an order out to him?

Not Even In Line And Out Of Line, Part 2
Not Even In Line And Out Of Line

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There Are Ways To Be Jerks In Every Language

, , , , , | Right | August 30, 2021

I’m a young woman with no piercings or tattoos. My hair is in a ponytail and I’m dressed in my work uniform. I’m working as a cashier and a young man comes up to order. He takes out a notepad, writes on it, and shows me.

Notepad: “Sorry, I’m deaf.”

Immediately, I start to sign to see if he’d rather communicate that way. The young man seems so excited. He starts telling me his order and expresses relief that someone knows how to sign. However, the next thing he asks leaves me in shock, and he rushes out of the store without his food. My coworker notices my disgust.

Coworker: “What was that about?”

Me: “He asked where to get cocaine, as I looked the ‘type.’”

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Not Chickening Out Of Standing Up

, , , | Right | August 27, 2021

I work for a famous chicken chain company and we are the only one in the entire area, so if they want this bucket of chicken, they have to come to us.

We are closing down, and on the last day, it’s hectic from the novelty of having this last chicken meal, but also because it’s the last day, half the staff don’t turn up. Since we’re understaffed and consistently busy with a backlog of orders, the front of house and the counter is a mess. It’s just slowing down near the end of the night, and we haven’t had a chance to fix anything. A woman walks in.

Customer: “This place is a mess.”

She then points out each thing wrong. I’m tired, I’ve had multiple bad customers, I’m near the end of a long shift, and I hope I never have to see this place again.

Me: “If you have so many issues, you don’t have to eat here.”

She gives me a look like she is thinking, “Why is this lowly server speaking back to me?”

Me: “Just leave. Many other restaurants are open that will be up to your standard.”

Customer: “I want to speak to the manager.”

My manager is listening behind the screen that separates the kitchen from the front of house.

Me: “I’m sorry, but I honestly don’t think you are worth his time. Now, I ask you to leave; we won’t be serving you.”

I’ve broken her a second time. She starts to yell and demands a manager’s attention. I just don’t care. I wait until she’s done.

Me: “No, I will not waste his time, and no, we will not serve you.”

She rages and turns to leave. As she’s going:


She wouldn’t. We were closing and the only thing she would see was a completely empty shut-down shop. My manager just started laughing.

Honestly, it turned out to be a not-so-completely-horrible night, and we still laugh at this over five years later.

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