Unfiltered Story #122297

, , , | Unfiltered | October 3, 2018

I’m standing in line behind a few guests at a popular fast food restaurant.  The man ahead of me suddenly asks the girl on register:

Man: Do you sell socks?
Employee: Do we sell…socks?
Man: Yes, socks.
Employee: …no.

Something Off About That Comment But I Can’t Put My Finger On It

, , , , | Right | October 1, 2018

(We’ve recently started up a finger-scanning process to replace our security codes on our registers. It’s still new, and everyone, including customers, are adjusting to it; to give discounts, the manager needs to scan their print. A regular has ordered his usual and gets a discount on his order using his senior card.)

Customer: “Oh, I need a senior discount, as well, please.”

Me: “All good. Just a sec.” *calls out* “[Manager], can I get senior, please?”

(She is finishing off a burger, and things are busy, so she runs over to press her print and runs off again. The customer notices the scanning and leans in close.)

Customer: “You know how you can fix that?”

Me: “How?”

Customer: “Cut her finger off.”

(He pulled away casually and paid for his meal like nothing had happened, leaving me bewildered.)

Unfiltered Story #122203

, , | Unfiltered | September 29, 2018

(I worked at an ice-cream stand at the mall. Out of all the crazy things that happened during that job, my co-workers were the real nutjobs. I was working a shift with the boss’s ex-wife. We had just served a customer together.)

Coworker: *with obvious disgust on her face* Did you see that?

Me: See what?

Coworker: That customer was just chewing away at those [popular midly smelly snack food]. I could smell them from here! People are so f****** rude!

(This was my first odd encounter with my co-workers, so I was confused and laughed it off. That job ended when my other coworker, the boss’s daughter, tried to frame me for stealing money. Needless to say I do not miss that job.)

Engineering Cheaper Prices For The Undeserving

, , , , , | Right | September 28, 2018

(I have worked at my store for close to three years while in college to help pay for my degree. This lady comes in to the drive-thru, and I am at the first window taking cash. I notice she has three ten-piece nuggets on her order, at four dollars each, and the twenty-piece we have is on special for five. I decide to try to explain it to her. I genuinely want to make it more affordable for her.)

Me: “Ma’am, are you interested in our twenty-piece nuggets? It’s three dollars cheaper to do that instead of the three ten-piece—”

Customer: *interrupts me* “They are going to different places.”

Me: “The twenty-piece comes in two ten-piece boxes, so the only difference is—”

Customer: *cuts over me again* “Look, I already said I wanted three ten-pieces.”

Me: “It’s going to be so much cheaper; are you sure?”

Customer: “Ring me up or get a manager.”

(At this point, the manager shows up anyway.)

Manager: “Is everything okay?”

Me: “Yes.” *takes the customers money*

Customer: *addressing manager* “This dumb high school dropout can’t even take money correctly. Is she slow? Like, in her brain?”

Me: *addressing manager* “I just told her about our twenty-piece promotion. She said she wants three ten-pieces in separate boxes, so she wouldn’t let me change it.”

Manager: *trying not to laugh, gets the nugget boxes from the grill and holds them up, and shows the customer* “Two ten-piece nuggets.”

(She holds them far apart. Then she brings them together.)

Manager: “One twenty-piece nugget. It’s three dollars cheaper. This girl is not a high school dropout; she is six credits away from her Associate’s, is on the dean’s list, and is majoring in engineering. What was your degree in?”

(My eyes were wide. I mutely handed the customer her change with her receipt. She glanced at it and asked why I didn’t change the price. My manager stepped around me and closed the window. She was easily the most difficult customer I have ever worked with.)

Fart Jokes Exist In A Vacuum

, , , , | Working | September 28, 2018

Our lobby is going to be closing soon, so my manager sends me out to vacuum the floor. There are a number of customers seated, eating, so my vacuuming will be limited to the places where no one is seated. The vacuum is old, and practically worthless in terms of cleaning, but my manager insists that there isn’t money available for a new one.

As get started, I feel gas building, and I end up farting. It’s a long one, too. The sound is covered by the noisy vacuum, so I keep going.

As I vacuum my way past a customer, I can hear them utter a yelp of horror over the noise. They are staring at my vacuum with expressions of absolute horror and disgust.

One of them says to me, “The motor is burning out.”

I don’t confess, mostly because I’m too embarrassed. I just nod with a straight face and keep going, dragging the smell behind me. Five minutes later, the smell has permeated the entire lobby. In those five minutes, everyone has complained to the manager about the smell of the “vacuum,” and everyone clears out. It’s still fifteen minutes until we close our lobby, but no customers have remained to tough it out.

The manager comes out from behind the counter, and stops dead when he meets the wall of scent. He gives my vacuum the same look of horror and disgust, gestures for me to stop vacuuming, and sends me to do other duties.

A few days later, a brand new vacuum is mysteriously afforded, and the old one is disposed of.

I’ve never confessed.

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