Me: “Okay, that’s $15.95.”
Customer: “I remember 1595. ‘Twas a good year; Hastings was a changed place, that’s for sure.”
Me: “And the maidens were young and fair?”
Customer: “Yep. The biggest news story was these two young people who got married but succumbed to a tragic murder-suicide. And some young ‘un going by the name Shakespeare was top of the charts. Yep, an interesting year for sure!” *wanders off with his purchase*
(I’m working drive-thru at a well known fast food place.)
Customer: “I’d like one large chocolate sundae, and one large sundae with chocolate or caramel on the bottom and chocolate or caramel on the top with extra chocolate or caramel. It doesn’t matter which one.”
Me: “So two large sundaes wi—”
Customer: “No, you’re not listening to me. One large chocolate sundae. One large sundae with chocolate or caramel on the bottom and chocolate or caramel on the top with extra chocolate or caramel. Either one.”
Me: “Okay. So in total you have tw—”
Customer: “NO, YOU AREN’T LISTENING. ONE LARGE CHOC—”
Manager: *signalling to me that the customer wants just one*
Me: “So you want one large sundae with chocolate on the bottom and caramel on the top with extra sauce?”
Customer: “YES. That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
Related:
Any Given Sundae
(I’m working as a cashier at a popular fast food restaurant and have had a pretty rough night so far. I’m just finishing up an order on a young lady when I notice a button from a TV show I like on her purse.)
Me: “Oh, you like [TV Show]?”
Customer: *gives me a deer in the headlights look* “…The TV show?”
Me: “Yup.”
Customer: *a freaked out look starts to form*
Me: *points to the button on her purse after seeing the freaked out look* “You have a button with the main character’s face on it.”
Customer: *looks at her purse and calms down* “Oh! For a second I thought you could read my mind.”
Me: *laughs* “Oh, if I could read minds I would not be here. I would go play poker and win all the money!”
(The customer laughed too and we talked briefly about the show before she went to wait for her food. I continued to go on with my shift in much higher spirits. It’s rare, but getting customers that are able to cheer me up, is a blessing on bad shifts.)
(As I’m working the till, an old man walks up to me. It takes a few minutes to fill out his order, because he can barely speak, and his finger shakes when he tries to tell me what he wants. He is extremely polite, and orders two coffees. After he leaves to get coffee stirrers, a young woman comes to my till.)
Customer: “Oh, my God, what a drag, huh? That guy was such a dumba**. He should just die and move over for the best generation. Am I right?”
Me: “…Why don’t I just take your order.”
(As she ordered, the old man, who heard what she said, walked up behind her quietly, popped the lid off of one of his coffees, and poured it all over the woman. She screamed, and ran away yelling about her clothes, while the old man ordered another coffee.)
(I go through the drive-thru for our dinner. When I get home, I discover my wife’s burger is wrong. I return to the store.)
Me: “I went thru the drive-thru a few minutes ago, and this is supposed to be a hamburger, but there’s cheese on it.”
Manager: “Sir, I am so sorry. We’ll fix that right away.” *tells cook the correct order*
(Another customer walks up.)
Other Customer: “Excuse me, this is not what I ordered.”
Manager: “I’m so sorry, ma’am, let me fix that.” *tells the cook correct order*
(A few minutes pass.)
Manager: “Here you are, sir. Again, I’m sorry for the mistake.”
(As I turn to leave, another customer walks up to the counter.)
Another Customer: “Hey, I just went through the drive-thru and my order is wrong.”
Manager: *turns to the back* “WHO’S TAKING ORDERS BACK THERE?! THIS IS RIDICULOUS!”
