(I go into a local fast food chain to get drinks for myself and a friend.)

Me: “Hi, could I get an Iced Mocha, and an Iced Caramel Mocha?”

Cashier: “Okay, so, a caramel frappe and a mocha frappe.”

Me: “Sorry, no, I wanted the Iced Mocha and Iced Caramel Mocha.”

Cashier: *rings me up for iced coffee, which is not the same thing* “Do you want French Vanilla, Hazelnut, or Caramel Syrup?”

Me: “Actually, I wanted the Iced Mocha.” *points to board* “Right up there.”

Cashier: *condescendingly* “Yes, did you want French Vanilla, Caramel, or Hazelnut syrup?”

Me: “None, because I don’t want an iced coffee. I wanted Iced Mochas.”

Cashier: “Don’t take that tone with me.”

(The cashier calls the manager over. I explain what I want and he punches in the two drinks.)

Cashier: “Do you still want the frappes?”

Me: “I never wanted the frappes.”

(The cashier took my money, and then practically threw the change at me. While I waited for my drinks, I noticed her whispering to coworkers and pointing at me. I can understand that it might have been her first day, but she didn’t need to treat me like that.)

Coworker: “Hi, can I help you?”

Customer: “A medium iced mocha.” *pauses*

Coworker: “Sure thing! Anything else?”

Customer: “JESUS CHRIST, WOULD YOU LET ME F****** FINISH? OH, my GOD ,you are just so RUDE! That is RIDICULOUS! DON’T ASK ME IF I WANT ANYTHING ELSE BEFORE I’M F***** FINISHED!”

Coworker: *stunned silence*

Customer: “And a LARGE COFFEE, CREAM ONLY!”

(I am the manager and decide to take this lady’s money and get her out of my drive-thru as quickly as possible. She rolls up to the window and throws me a five dollar bill, still yelling.)

Customer: “I’m sorry, but THAT IS RIDICULOUS! JUST OVER THE TOP! I AM HAVING A BAD DAY AND I JUST CAN’T TAKE YOU PEOPLE RIGHT NOW!”

Me: *silently hands her the drinks* “Your change is thirty-two cents.”

Customer: “You can give it to the girl I cussed at. It will probably make her feel better.”

(I’m a cashier at a well-known fast-food restaurant. I’m prone to forget every person that enters the store, especially the regular customers, so I develop a way to identify who is who based on what stands out from each person. One couple stands out the most, because not only because they are a biracial couple, but they a have a “Romeo and Juliet” love story going on. One day I see the guy without his “Juliet.”)

Me: “Hey, I didn’t notice you without her around you.”

Customer: *frowning* “Oh… yeah, her.”

Me: *catching on* “Oh! I am so sorry it didn’t work out with her.”

Customer: “Yeah, she isn’t what I thought she is.”

Me: “That’s okay. There’s plenty of fish in the sea.”

Customer: *suddenly smirking* “Yeah, and it looks like I’m going to reel one in.”

Me: “Aww. Who’s the lucky girl?”

Customer: *leans over the counter* “How old are you?”

Me: “Um…17. I just graduated this year and currently taking online classes so that I can still work.”

Customer: *frowning* “Oh. Well, I’m 19 and I just thought that since you’re a nice looking girl and I’m a nice looking guy that… you know… we can…”

Me: *shaking my head* “Sorry. I don’t hook up with customers at work and even if I see you outside of work… No. Just no.”

Customer: *getting offended* “Is it because I’m black? I bet you like some Mexican guys.”

(I’m half Puerto Rican and half Honduran.)

Me: “Nope. I like black guys more than Hispanics. Is just that being young I don’t want anybody right now.”

Customer: *in disbelief* “You were hurt in your last relationship, weren’t you?”

Me: “Sorry, but I’m not obligated to tell you anything personal about me.”

Customer: *upset* “But you know everything between me and [Ex-girlfriend]!”

Me: “But you did it at your own will. You didn’t have to tell me anything, but you still did. Now are you going to order something ? There’s actual customers coming in that actually wants to eat instead of pestering me.”

Customer: *gives up* “Fine. But as soon as you turn 18, you know where I live at.”

Me: “At a run-down motel down the street? Cool. Have a great day.”

(He leaves as soon as one of our regulars enters.)

Regular: “What’s this guy’s problem?”

Me: “Apparently he can’t take no for answer. He was trying to ask me out right after his girlfriend broke up with him even after I told him I was 17.”

Regular: *dumbfounded* “But aren’t you 19?”

(I’m sitting at a fast food restaurant, and I overhear this conversation. Note that there is one register with a sign on it stating the card machine is broken.)

Cashier: “Hi, Welcome to [Store]; I can help you over at this register.”

Customer: “Or you could stop being a lazy piece of s*** and take care of me on THIS register?”

Cashier: “Sir, that register is broken. You can try to order there all you like but I can promise you that you aren’t getting anything out of it.”

(My boyfriend and I go to grab food from a well known fast food chain. We usually have our order figured out, but my eye catches a new item on their menu as we roll up to the speaker.)

Cashier: “Hi, welcome to [Chain]. How can I help you today?”

Me: *long silence*

Cashier: “…Hello?”

Me: “Oh, sorry. I was a bit speechless. I just saw this bacon three-way burger.”

Cashier: “Yeah, most people are. Just let me know when you’re ready to order, and don’t forget to breathe!”

Boyfriend: “Did he just…?”

Me: “Remind me to breathe? Yes. Yes, he did.”

(We ordered. I did indeed get that burger, and the cashier was really cool and wished us to enjoy the three-way. He was awesome.)