(A customer places an order in drive-thru. I give them their total and greet them at the window.)

Me: “Hi, your total is [total].”

Customer: “Sorry, can we add a large drink to that?”

(I ring it in and give them their new total.)

Me: “Okay, with the drink your new total is [$3.00 more].”

(She hands me enough money for the original total.)

Me: *counting the money* “Sorry, I just need another $3.”

Customer: “Okay.”

(She doesn’t move, just smiles at me.)

Me: “Sorry, you were $3 short. Your total was [total] and you only gave me [amount].”

Customer: “…”

Me: “…I need another $3.”

Customer: “I’m just trying to figure out why it costs more now.”

(I work in a popular make-your-own-sandwich shop, with lots of combinations, so it’s easy to understand why people would need a bit of extra time.)

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Store]! What can I get you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I want to try one of those pizza things.”

Me: “Sure! What kind?”

Customer: “Pepperoni.”

(I start making the pizza — they’re always made to order, as they take only 90 seconds. I had put only the sauce on, no toppings or cheese or anything, when…)

Customer: “That looks gross. I don’t want that any more.”

Me: “Okay, then.” *I put it off to the side* “Can I get you anything else?”

Customer: “Yeah, one of the foot-long Philly cheesesteaks.”

Me: “Okay, on Italian bread?”

Customer: “Yeah, sure, whatever.”

(The customer then proceeds to turn around, walk out of the store, and drive away. I’m standing there holding the steak, just watching and trying to figure out what just happened. I decide to move on, as it is lunch time and we have a line.)

Next Customer: “My turn?”

Me: “Apparently so!”

(The customer never came back.)

Me: *in the drive-thru of a very popular fast food joint and trying new drink* “Hi! Can I have two large [Milkshake]s?”

Worker: “Two small?”

Me: “…large?”

Worker: “What drink?”

Me: “…[Milkshake]s?”

Worker: “Okay, your order will be at the window!” *a total pops up on a screen*

Me: “Thanks…” *looks closely to make sure it was two large and the right milkshakes before getting to the window*

Me: *a shift change happens when I get to the window and wait as someone shows up with my order*

New Worker: “Hi that’s $[total]!” *this is the right amount for two large milkshakes*

Me: *hands money over and get changes, has another five-minute wait*

New Worker: “Here are two [Milkshake]s!” *holds them out for me to take*

Me: *smiles happily to finally get them but frowns when I notice the drinks are small* “Uh, bad news; I order two large and they look too small.”

New Worker: *blinks and looks at order again to see I’m not lying about the size* “Oh, sorry!”

Me: *watch the worker run off with the small drinks and park my car with a sigh*

New Worker: *comes back eight minutes later with the right size milkshakes* “Here we go!”

Me: *glad to take them and leaves*

Me: “Can I get you anything else today?”

Customer: “I’d like this with a meal, but with cookies instead of chips.”

Me: “All right. What kind of cookies?”

Customer: “Chocolate chip.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry; someone just bought the last ones. We have chocolate chip with M&M cookies instead if that’s all right.”

Customer: “Just chocolate chip.”

Me: “We’re out of those at the moment, like I just said, but we have all the other kinds of cookies available right now.”

Customer: “But I got chocolate chip yesterday.”

Me: “Well, we don’t have any right now.”

Customer: “But there were some yesterday. That’s what I got yesterday. Chocolate chip.”

Me: “Well, that was yesterday. TODAY we are out. We have all the other kinds, though.”

Customer: “…But yesterday I got chocolate chip.”

Me: “That’s not what you’re getting today. Not here, anyway.”

(The customer got M&M cookies instead and left looking supremely confused and angry with me for not giving him the chocolate chip cookies we didn’t have.)

I’m the idiot in this story.

I recently started working at this restaurant, and as such, I haven’t figured everything out yet. On this particularly slow Saturday night, I’ve been restocking the various items under the front counter, like the sauces, cups, and lids, as well as cleaning around all these things, too. I see a button that looks like it would release something (I can’t remember what now) so I could clean under it. I press it, and nothing happens. I ignore the button and continue cleaning.

Less than five minutes later, my manager’s on the phone with the franchise owner, and we’ve got two police officers standing in the lobby. Apparently, I’d pressed the silent alarm button. I get a short talking-to, but everyone laughs it off and the officers are just glad there was no danger. The manager gives them a couple of sandwiches for their trouble, and everything goes back to normal.

I felt incredibly bad and apologized profusely, only to be told, “It’s happened before, and it’ll happen again. People just like pushing buttons, even if they don’t know what they’re for.”

Guilty as charged.