And The Thigh Bone’s Connected To The

, | Right | September 8, 2011

Customer: “I’ll have two wings, one breast, and one side-breast.”

Cashier: “Side-breast?”

Customer: “Yes, side-breast…” *repeats order*

Cashier: “What’s that?”

Customer: “Well, you have the breast, which is the front of the chicken, and the side-breast, which is half of the breast.”

Cashier: “Well, we don’t do that. We have thighs, legs, wings, ribs, and breast.”

Customer: “No, you have side-breast! I always have side-breast! There it is–those ones there!”

(The customer points to a pile in one of the heating units.)

Cashier: “Oh, you mean rib!”

Customer: “Yes, side-breast!”

1 Thumbs
1,296

Will That Be Paper Or Plastic

, | Right | August 31, 2011

Customer: “Can I get a cheeseburger and a bottle of water?”

Me: “Yes, that’s $3.70, please.”

(The customer holds out five napkins and starts counting them. He then hands them to me as payment.)

Me: “Sorry, do you have $3.70?”

Customer: *points at napkins* “Yea, there! Look!”

Me: “Those are not money. Do you have any money to pay?”

Customer: “Yeah! I’m paying with napkins!”

Coworker: “Sorry, we only take money…”

(Eventually, security had to come and him (and his napkins) away from the tills.)

1 Thumbs
1,871

The Secret Is In The Sauce

, | Right | August 19, 2011

(We moved to America because my dad’s work was transported to a new port. He is very bad with English, so many hilarious moments ensued when he buys food. At the moment, this fast food restaurant is heavily marketing one of its burgers. My dad decides he wants to try one.)

Cashier: “Hello, how may I help you today?”

Dad: “Yes, I would like the Big and Nasty Burger, please!”

Cashier: “Excuse me?”

Dad: “The Big and Nasty Burger!”

Cashier: “Um, do you mean the Big and Tasty Burger, sir?”

Dad: “Yes, that’s what I said! The Big and Nasty!”

1 Thumbs
1,417

Having Funion With Food

, | Right | August 16, 2011

Me: “Any veggies on your sandwich?”

Customer: *mumbles*

(I think I hear “onions” and reach for them.)

Customer: “No, no, no, no, no, no, NO! No onions, no onions, no, no, NO!”

Me: “I’m sorry, no onions then. What did you say?”

Customer: *repeats veggie order*

(I get to ringing her up and she begins to apologize.)

Customer: “I’m sorry if I startled you.”

Me: “Oh, it’s okay.”

Customer: “It’s just…I don’t like onions.”

Me: “It’s really okay.”

Customer: “No, you don’t understand. You would have had to remake my sandwich. I hate onions! They make me want to vomit! Vomit everywhere!”

1 Thumbs
1,326

The Short, Rainbow-Colored Bridge From Injured Pride To Pride Parades

, | Right | July 25, 2011

(A customer and his son approach the counter. Note that the son is no more than 11 or 12 years-old.)

Customer: “Hey, my son has something to ask you.”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer’s son: “Will you wanna go out with me?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Come on, it’s his first time asking a girl out! If you turn him down, he might get discouraged and go gay. You don’t want to turn him gay, do you?!”

1 Thumbs
2,043