Not How To Spice Up Your Love Life

| WA, USA | Romantic | February 14, 2017

(My fiancée and I are stereotypical white people who can’t handle spice. We recently went to her favorite taco truck. It was my first time there.)

Fiancée: “I should warn you that the food is a little spicy.”

(My fiancée is worse than I am with spice, so I think nothing of it.)

Me: “Thanks for letting me know. What do they use?”

Fiancée: “They put lots of cilantro on the food.”

(I know that not everyone likes cilantro, but I never thought of it as spicy before! My tacos were delicious, by the way.)

Food Is Fast But Complaints Are Faster

| WI, USA | Right | February 14, 2017

General Manager: “I’m sorry, it’ll just be a short wait on your [item].”

Customer: “What? Why should I wait? Isn’t this supposed to be fast food?”

General Manager: “Yes, it’s fast food, not instant food.”

Your Order Is Toast

, | MD, USA | Working | February 13, 2017

(I am ordering a sandwich for lunch at a popular sandwich chain where you watch the employees make the sandwich as you order.)

Me: “I’d like a six-inch, sweet onion chicken teriyaki sub, on whole wheat bread, please.”

Employee: “Toasted?”

Me: “No, but can you heat the chicken, please?”

Employee: “Toasted?”

Me: “Just heat the meat, please.”

Employee: “The bread?”

Me: *getting frustrated* “No, just heat the chicken.”

Employee: “The meat?”

Me: “Yes!”

(She proceeds to place the chicken in the microwave for at least two minutes. The chicken is still in the microwave when I get to the next employee, who isn’t any better…)

Employee #2: “What is this?”

Me: “A sweet onion chicken teriyaki sub.”

Employee #2: “Toasted?”

Me: “No, the meat is in the microwave.”

Employee #2: “You want the bread toasted?”

Me: “No, the chicken is being heated now.”

Employee #2: “Oh!”

(She gets the chicken from the microwave.)

Me: “I’d like lettuce and cucumber please.”

Employee #2: *puts lettuce and tomato on the sandwich* “Lettuce and tomato okay?”

Me: *pointing at cucumber which is away from the tomato* “No tomato, cucumber.”

Employee #2: *picking off lettuce* “Tomato?”

Me: “Lettuce. Cucumber.”

Employee #2: *leaves tomato on, adds lettuce and cucumber* “What’s next?”

Me: “Take off the tomato, please.”

(Eventually she got the sandwich right. I’m not usually picky about what goes on my sandwich but I was ordering for someone else. The people behind and in front of me were having similar communication issues, so it wasn’t just me!)

Raw Stupidity

| NY, USA | Right | February 12, 2017

(I work as a janitor in a fast food restaurant.)

Customer: “My burger is raw; take it back.”

Me: *cleaning up a spill* “One second, I’ll go get the manager.”

Customer: “No, You take it!”

Me: “Um… okay.”

(I look at the burger.)

Me: “This isn’t even raw.”

Customer: “The lettuce is!”

Ehrrenge Is The New Orange

, | FL, USA | Right | February 11, 2017

(I am taking orders over the drive-thru speaker.)

Me: “What would you like to drink with that?”

Customer: “Ehrrenge soda.”

Me: *figuring he meant orange soda* “Sir, we don’t have orange soda.”

Customer: “Ehrrenge soda!” *really emphasizing the ‘errrrr’ sounds and making it sound like only one syllable*

Me: “We don’t have orange; can I get you something else?”

Customer: *loudly* “I want errrnge soda!”

Me: *in the same loud volume* “Sir, we ain’t got no errrnge soda!”

Customer: *in completely normal voice* “Oh, okay. I’ll have Coke.”

(He pulls around and my coworkers are laughing hysterically. I guess I just had to say it in a way he would understand. To this day we call orange “errnnnge”.)

Page 34/251First...3233343536...Last
« Previous
Next »