You’re Bean Unreasonable

| KY, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work drive-thru in a Mexican restaurant.)

Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

Customer: “I want a burrito; I’m a vegetarian.”

Me: “Well, we have a vegetarian burrito that would be perfect.”

Customer: “What’s in it?”

Me: “It has beans—”

Customer: “NO! I don’t eat beans. They’re cooked in animal juices. Don’t you know anything about vegetarians?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, our beans are just made with spices and water; no animal juices.”

Customer: “Oh, my god, never mind. If you don’t want to co-operate I’m just gonna go to McDonald’s!”

You Are Not In The House Of Cards

, | Olympia, WA, USA | Food & Drink, Money

(I work in the food court of a warehouse store. We have signs that clearly say ‘cash or check only’ above the registers. Someone comes up and orders their food.)

Me: “All right, let me get that for you!”

Customer: *attempts to hand me a card*

Me: “I’m sorry, but we only take cash or check on these registers.”

Customer: “What? Since when?”

Me: “I don’t think we have ever taken cards because we don’t have a card reader.”

Customer: “Well, why not? It would make life so much easier!”

Me: “They charge us every time the card reader is swiped, and since we make very little profit on our food, we would have to raise the price.”

Customer: “Well then, raise it! I don’t see why people would get so upset!”

Me: *gets food* “All right, that will be $1.63.”

Customer: “WHAT? It’s $1.50 up on the board.”

Me: “There is tax on it.”

Customer: *grumbles about ‘raising prices on food being ridiculous’ as he hands over the money and stomps off*

Thanks No-Name!

| QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Funny Names

(I work in fast food, and at our store we have a number of questions we need to ask customers.)

Me: “So that was a medium fries and a wrap. Would you like to upsize the fries for 50c?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “…and did you want to make that a meal?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Did you have your loyalty card on you today?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Would you like to start one?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “And can I grab your name for the order?”

Customer: “No. Oh! Sorry. Paul.”