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That Last Part Is The Icing On The Pancake

| MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(It’s Sunday morning, during our breakfast menu.)

Me: *hearing the door open* “Good morning!”

Customer: “Do you guys have any platters where I can just get sausage and eggs?”

Me: *searching through the options on the screen* “Hey, [Coworker], do we have platters without pancakes?”

Coworker: “No, I don’t think so. Why?”

Me: “He wants to get just eggs and sausage on a platter.”

Coworker: “We can ring him up just the sides.”

Customer: “How much would that be?”

Me: *ringing up the eggs and sausage* “It’s gonna be about $5. Did you want to try the ultimate?”

Customer: “What does it come with?”

Me: “It has the eggs, sausage, we’ll replace the pancakes with another side of sausage. And you get a side of hashbrowns with it.”

Customer: “Bacon.”

Me: “Not the sausage?”

Customer: “No, just bacon. How much?”

(I cash out the customer while my coworker shouts the order back to kitchen, repeating it several times so that kitchen can actually understand it. She tells them it’s with the pancakes; I correct them that that’s being replaced with the bacon. This entire time, the customer is still right next to me, and can hear everything the two of us have said. When it comes out, half of the tray is covered with bacon, while the rest is with scrambled eggs.)

Customer: *interrupting me while I’m bagging the order* “What’s in that platter?”

Me: “It’s just the bacon and eggs, like you wanted.”

Customer: “No, you charged me for the ultimate. You charged me for the pancakes. Give me them.”

Me: “We replaced the pancakes with the bacon like you wanted.”

Customer: “You charged me for pancakes. Give me my pancakes.”

Me: “All right, just a moment, please.” *starts walking away*

Customer: “No ‘just a moment.’ Give it now!”

Me: “I need to get my manager.”

(I quickly explain the situation to the manager on shift, explaining that we gave him what he wanted and was charged for.)

Manager: *after about a minute, to the kitchen* “I need some pancakes, please!”

(At this point, I’ve holed myself at the specialty drink station, doing the morning prep.)

Me: *to Coworker* “Please give me something to justify my staying here until he leaves…”

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An Idiot Combo

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Technology

(Most of the burgers offered by the chain restaurant I work at come in a combo. We are required to ask whether customers want a small, medium, or large combo, although many of them tend to be confused at the combo sizes.)

Customer: *in a foreign accent* “I want a number two combo.”

Me: “Certainly; what size would you like for your combo to be: small, medium, or lar—”

Customer: *getting irritated* “What are you talking about? What is in the number two combo?”

Me: “It comes with fries, and a drink of your choice.”

(The customer suddenly turns and walks away to the back of the line, and not knowing what he had in mind, I clear his order and take the orders of several other customers before facing him again.)

Customer: “What language do you speak?”

Me: “English?”

Customer: *raging* “Then why are you too stupid to understand my order? I just want a number two burger and a big [Soda]!”

Me: “So that’ll be a large [Soda] for you?”

Customer: “No! I want a small [Soda]! I am much smarter than you!”

Me: “Is that so? All right.” *points to debit card reader* “Please swipe your card to begin processing the transaction.”

Customer: *stares blankly at card reader* “What is this? How am I supposed to use this?”

Me: “If you are much smarter than me, you should be able to figure this out with no problem.”

(The customer continued to ramble on in unintelligible grunts and mumbles until I helped him finish processing the transaction. He took his meal and left without giving me any further trouble.)

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A Link To Past Sales

| OH, USA | Funny Names, Geeks Rule, Popular

(I am working the pay window of the drive-thru. The terminal we run credit cards in displays the name on the card when a card is run. In the middle of a transaction for a customer, I notice something peculiar about his name.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I almost laughed at your name.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Do you know the Legend of Zelda series?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Your last name is similar to ‘Ganondorf,’ the main villain.”

(The customer lets out a loud laugh similar to the one Ganondorf makes in one of the games.)

Customer: “At last we meet, Link!”

(He took his credit card and receipt before driving off.)