(“Coning” — grabbing the ice-cream by the cream and not the cone, while filming the drive-thru staff’s reaction– at fast food restaurants is popular and there are two ways we handle it. Some employees find it hilarious and others get annoyed because we often have to clean up the mess. Some would even refuse to give the ice cream if the customer made a move to grab it from the top.)

Customer #1: “Four vanilla ice creams.”

(I’m incredibly wary because I can see via camera they are four young teenagers.)

Me: “Okay, that’ll be $[total]. Please pull up to the first window.”

(Once they pull up and hand me the money, I can see they have a camera in the passenger’s seat. I nod at my manager, who is a friend of mine, in case there is any trouble.)

Me: “Here’s your change. And your ice cream.” *[Customer #1] goes to grab from the top and I pull away* “Just to let you know we do have the right to refuse service to anyone we feel will cause a disturbance. Now, I will give you this cone and you will take it from the BOTTOM and turn off your camera or I will call the police.”

Customer #2: “This is public property; I can film you!”

Me: “ACTUALLY, it’s private property open to the public, so we CAN ask you to stop filming, and I’m a minor and I don’t consent to getting filmed.”

(The four teens look at each other, clearly never expecting me to know this much about law.)

Me: “Now, will you take this cone from the bottom? You’ve already paid for it; might as well take it.”

(The customer reaches for the cone from the bottom and does the same for the rest while the passenger turns off the camera — after I make him show me the screen to prove he deleted the footage.)

Me: “Have a great day.”

Customer #2: “Hey, dude, let’s go to [Popular Hamburger Place across the road] and do it there.”

(I had a friend who worked the drive-thru there and texted her to watch out for those guys and reminded her of what to say. Needless to say, those guys weren’t getting any ice cream that day.)

(We are in the middle of a rush. A customer orders almost all of our chicken; we only have white meat in our original recipe left. The car behind him wants a crispy two-piece meal and some potato wedges.)

Me: “The car in front of you ordered all the crispy that I had on hand.”

(This doesn’t seem to bother him too much. He gets to the window, pays for a meal, and asks to talk to my manager. As the general manager is cooking more chicken, his relief manager talks to him.)

Customer: “You guys never have the chicken I order! Every time I come in I need to wait about fifteen to twenty minutes for you to get my food.”

(After complaining, he took his food and left. About fifteen minutes later he calls the store complaining.)

Customer: “The chicken is disgusting; I wouldn’t even feed it to my dog! The potato wedges are harder than bone! I am going to come to the store and show you how bad of a job you did!”

(He shows up and shows us a chicken he had. It has met all of our selling expectations. In the store he said his potato wedges are too soggy so he had to bake them in is own oven, and now they are too hard. Since the guy is being a complete jack-a**, my manager refuses to give him a refund and tells him to leave the restaurant. The customer decides to record the whole conversation between him and my manager. He goes outside and pouts for fifteen minutes; after that, he calls the cops. The officer talks to him for ten minutes and then comes inside. The officer is wondering, just as we are, what is wrong with this guy. My manager tells the officer what happened, then the officer goes back outside to talk to the guy.)

Customer: “Can I at least post the video I took online?

Officer: “Sure, if you want to make an a** of yourself.”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Officer: “You were angry because they sold you perfectly good chicken, potato wedges that you ruined yourself, and you wanted them to refund you $13 even though you have eaten more than half of your meal. You would be making an a** of yourself.”

(One night I’m working the front register. An older male customer walks in.)

Me: “Hello, what can I get for you?”

Customer: “I want a double cheeseburger, small fry, and a ten-piece chicken nugget.”

Me: *inputs the order* “Anything else for tonight, sir?”

Customer: “I want my nuggets dropped FRESH!”

(My night-shift manager is behind our wall with our fryers.)

Night Manager: “Sir, our nuggets just came up.”

Customer: “I DON’T CARE. I WANT THEM DROPPED!”

Me: *takes his money as I think to myself* “If we drop your nuggets right after some JUST came up, that means you’d have to wait longer, dumb-a**.”

(I’m on order-taker and cashier one night when we run out of the most popular flavour of sundae topping, chocolate. Most customers are fine with just taking one of the two other flavours we offer, including this guy, who’s order has been going as normal until this point, if not a little too long. I remain my happy, polite self throughout this whole time, however.)

Customer: *pulls up to the first window* “I’ll have to change the combo to a medium, I only have $20.”

(This is no issue, so I automatically change it on my screen. That only brings his order down to $20.90. I apologise to the customer and ask him what he’d like to take off.)

Customer: “I don’t want to take anything off!”

Me: “Sorry, but you’ll have to take something off to get under $20.”

Customer: *suddenly pulls out a $50 note from somewhere in his car and snaps* “NEXT TIME HAVE F****** CHOCOLATE, THEN!”

(I work at a popular southern fast food joint. We serve dinners that can either come with one or two sides, but two sides cost more. A lady comes up to my register to order. She is talking on the phone to her friend.)

Me: “Hello! Will this be dine in or carry out?”

Customer: “I want a five-dollar two-piece chicken dinner, dark meat, with green beans and mac and cheese.”

Me: “Okay. But will this be dine in or carry out?”

Customer: *talks to friend on the phone*

Me: “Ma’am, dine in or carry out? I can’t put your order into the register unless I press dine in or carry out. Also, getting two side orders makes the price go up. Is that okay?”

Customer: “Did you not just hear me? I told you my order.”

Me: *trying not to lose my patience, I just press carry out* “Would you like anything else?”

Customer: “How much is it?”

Me: “It’ll be $6.59.”

Customer: *gives me her card while continuing to talk on the phone*

(I swipe her card and pack her dinner to go. When I go to hand her the dinner, she turns red.)

Customer: “I told you I wanted this for here! And why the h*** did you charge me $6.59? I ordered the five-dollar two-piece dinner!”

Me: “Actually, you didn’t tell me anything. And if you had been paying attention, I told you that getting two sides makes it more expensive. Two sides aren’t part of the five-dollar deal.”

Customer: “I’m never coming back here ever again. Y’all have the worst customer service ever!”

Me: “You have a nice day, ma’am.”