Not A Morning Person Every Five Minutes

| MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Time

(We get a line of about ten cars at once in the drive-thru. Two cars in, I hear a car at the end of the line laying on their horn.)

Me: *over headset* “Is that one of our customers honking?”

Coworker: *over headset* “Yes, and she’s yelling about something, too.”

(Less than four minutes later, the angry customer is at my window. I have her food ready.)

Me: “Here you go. Sorry about the—”

Customer: “I want to know why the hell it TOOK SO LONG TO GET THAT LINE GONE.” *she yanks the bag so forcefully out of my hand that the bag rips* “NOW YOU’VE MADE ME LATE FOR WORK, YOU F****** IDIOT. WHAT TOOK SO F****** LONG?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we just got busy. I do apologize for your wait—”

Customer: “GIVE ME MY F****** [SODA]!”

Me: “Here’s your [Soda]. Again, I’m sorry about your wait.”

Customer: “F*** YOU ALL!” *speeds away*

Manager: *over headset* “If a five minute wait made her late for work, she obviously didn’t have enough time to go anywhere before her shift. Clearly, somebody peed in her Cheerios this morning.”

Me: *over headset* “I hate people.”

Smiles Can Go Miles

, | DE, USA | Awesome Customers

(I work mostly morning shifts at a mall food court. I love it, because it’s slow and I can people watch, and most of the time when I do get customers, they’re either senior citizens, mall employees, or moms with babies, and they’re all wonderful. I’ve been working there for a couple of weeks when an old man walks up to me.)

Me: “Hi, how are you?”

Customer: “You know, I’m in here pretty much every day, and I see you watching people and smiling and laughing, and it always makes me happy. I just wanted to make sure you know that there’s a lot of bad stuff going on in this world, but if you keep smiling, things will start to get better.”

Me: *beaming* “Thank you.”

(He nods at me and walks away. My manager walks up from the back and grins at me.)

Manager: “Keep smiling, my friend.”

(I’ve been working there for four months now and that’s still the best thing that’s happened to me on the job.)

Our Way Or Go Away

| Canada | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(Our meals always comes with rice or noodles and is the first step in the plating process.)

Customer: “Okay! I’d like your orange chicken.”

Employee: “Great! Would you like rice or noodles to start?”

Customer: “I like to start with the orange chicken.”

Employee: “Sure! But our plates start with rice or noodles.”

Customer: *smirks, backs away, puts away his tray* “Well then, if you like it YOUR way.” *mumbles something and walks away; complains to his wife how we like it OUR way*

Getting A Proper Grilling

| NJ, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Funny Names

(The customer is a man about 50 years old. He orders a number 12, which is a chicken sandwich. I ask him if he wants crispy or grilled chicken and he says grilled. A few minutes after getting his food he comes back up to the counter.)

Customer: “This isn’t what I wanted.”

Me: *opens box* “This is a grilled chicken sandwich.”

Customer: “I wanted the grill.”

Me: “…Right. This is grilled.”

Customer: “No. You just said this is chicken! I didn’t want chicken. I wanted the grill.”

Me: “You ordered a chicken sandwich grilled… that’s what it says on your receipt.”

Customer: “I did want the grill, but I didn’t want chicken!”

Me: *blank stare* “I don’t understand.”

Customer: “The grill! I wanted the grill! You asked me crispy or grilled and I wanted the grill!”

Me: “The number 12 is a chicken sandwich, sir. That’s what you ordered.”

Customer: “I don’t want chicken. I want the grill.”

Me: “…Did you want a burger?”

Customer: “Yes! A grilled burger! I wanted the grill!”

A Sour Attitude

, | NJ, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I ring up a customer for a sweet tea. The sweet tea is self-serve, but we have lemon slices in the back that we can give the customer if requested.)

Customer: “I want lemon.”

Me: “Sure, no problem.” *puts slice of lemon in a small cup as is customary, and hands it to her*

Customer: *looks inside, makes disgusted face, gives it back* “No. That’s not what I wanted. I want SOME lemon.”

Me: “Um, we usually just give out one slice. How many did you want?”

Customer: “Whatever you consider to be SOME lemon.”

Me: *hesitantly gives her two more slices* “Here you go?”

Customer: “That’s too much.” *gives one back and walks away*

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