I Am 17, Going On No Thanks

| SC, USA | Romantic | November 14, 2016

(I’m a cashier at a well-known fast-food restaurant. I’m prone to forget every person that enters the store, especially the regular customers, so I develop a way to identify who is who based on what stands out from each person. One couple stands out the most, because not only because they are a biracial couple, but they a have a “Romeo and Juliet” love story going on. One day I see the guy without his “Juliet.”)

Me: “Hey, I didn’t notice you without her around you.”

Customer: *frowning* “Oh… yeah, her.”

Me: *catching on* “Oh! I am so sorry it didn’t work out with her.”

Customer: “Yeah, she isn’t what I thought she is.”

Me: “That’s okay. There’s plenty of fish in the sea.”

Customer: *suddenly smirking* “Yeah, and it looks like I’m going to reel one in.”

Me: “Aww. Who’s the lucky girl?”

Customer: *leans over the counter* “How old are you?”

Me: “Um…17. I just graduated this year and currently taking online classes so that I can still work.”

Customer: *frowning* “Oh. Well, I’m 19 and I just thought that since you’re a nice looking girl and I’m a nice looking guy that… you know… we can…”

Me: *shaking my head* “Sorry. I don’t hook up with customers at work and even if I see you outside of work… No. Just no.”

Customer: *getting offended* “Is it because I’m black? I bet you like some Mexican guys.”

(I’m half Puerto Rican and half Honduran.)

Me: “Nope. I like black guys more than Hispanics. Is just that being young I don’t want anybody right now.”

Customer: *in disbelief* “You were hurt in your last relationship, weren’t you?”

Me: “Sorry, but I’m not obligated to tell you anything personal about me.”

Customer: *upset* “But you know everything between me and [Ex-girlfriend]!”

Me: “But you did it at your own will. You didn’t have to tell me anything, but you still did. Now are you going to order something ? There’s actual customers coming in that actually wants to eat instead of pestering me.”

Customer: *gives up* “Fine. But as soon as you turn 18, you know where I live at.”

Me: “At a run-down motel down the street? Cool. Have a great day.”

(He leaves as soon as one of our regulars enters.)

Regular: “What’s this guy’s problem?”

Me: “Apparently he can’t take no for answer. He was trying to ask me out right after his girlfriend broke up with him even after I told him I was 17.”

Regular: *dumbfounded* “But aren’t you 19?”

Lack Of Register Does Not Register, Part 7

| IN, USA | Right | November 11, 2016

(I’m sitting at a fast food restaurant, and I overhear this conversation. Note that there is one register with a sign on it stating the card machine is broken.)

Cashier: “Hi, Welcome to [Store]; I can help you over at this register.”

Customer: “Or you could stop being a lazy piece of s*** and take care of me on THIS register?”

Cashier: “Sir, that register is broken. You can try to order there all you like but I can promise you that you aren’t getting anything out of it.”

Related:
Lack of Register Does Not Register, Part 6
Lack of Register Does Not Register, Part 5
Lack of Register Does Not Register, Part 4

Always Wanted To Be The Meat Between Two Buns

| WI, USA | Working | November 10, 2016

(My boyfriend and I go to grab food from a well known fast food chain. We usually have our order figured out, but my eye catches a new item on their menu as we roll up to the speaker.)

Cashier: “Hi, welcome to [Chain]. How can I help you today?”

Me: *long silence*

Cashier: “…Hello?”

Me: “Oh, sorry. I was a bit speechless. I just saw this bacon three-way burger.”

Cashier: “Yeah, most people are. Just let me know when you’re ready to order, and don’t forget to breathe!”

Boyfriend: “Did he just…?”

Me: “Remind me to breathe? Yes. Yes, he did.”

(We ordered. I did indeed get that burger, and the cashier was really cool and wished us to enjoy the three-way. He was awesome.)

She Needs All The Sweetness She Can Get

, | USA | Right | November 9, 2016

(I am working at a well-known fast food restaurant when a lady comes in and asks for a large vanilla iced coffee with two extra pumps of sugar. We already put five pumps in all large iced coffees. A little while later she comes running back up to the counter. I hear the conversation between my manager and her.)

Lady: “You got it wrong again! This is too sweet! How hard is it to make a god- d***ed iced coffee with TWO extra sugar!?”

Manager: “I’m sorry about that, ma’am. I will be happy to replace your coffee but I have to ask you to refrain from cussing. There are children here.”

Lady: “Fine! Just get me my coffee. ONLY TWO extra sugars! Not 20 like you always do!”

(My manager goes to make her a new iced coffee. He hands it to her and asks her to try it.)

Lady: “Finally! Someone can get it right.”

(She storms out of the store without another word and I walk over to my manager.)

Me: “Sir, I made that coffee and I can assure you I only put 2 extra sugars in it.”

Manager: “I know. She comes in every now and then and does the same thing. What she really wants is ONLY two pumps of sugar.”

Me: “Has anyone told her?”

Manager: “Yes, but she insists that extra means only.”

Can You Be A**-Hole Phobic?

, | WI, USA | Friendly | November 7, 2016

(My mom has flown out to visit me, so we decide to meet up to have lunch. The restaurant we choose is fairly busy with only one person on the register and a fairly long line. Directly ahead of us is two women who are obviously together, holding hands and whispering to each other. After a minute or so, they start kissing, just as the cashier calls them up to order. They keep kissing, so my mother clears her throat to try and get their attention.)

Girl #1: *angrily* “What?! Do you have a problem?”

Mom: “No, but it’s…”

Girl #2: “Bet she does. Does it make you uncomfortable to see two women kissing? Huh? Well, too bad! The law’s on our side now!”

Mom: *after a short pause* “Actually, I just wanted to point out that you can order.”

(She gave them both a big smile, while they kept glaring, before turning to order. They kept shooting nasty looks at us, and we made sure to take a seat away from where they were sitting. Maybe they thought we were homophobes, but we just didn’t want to deal with their nasty attitudes.)

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