Baby, Don’t Come Back

| Enfield, London, UK | Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I am a customer in this story, observing another customer. As I am walking into the shop to order, a young woman with a baby in a pram cuts in front of me and walks up to the counter.)

Woman: *to the server at the counter* “Look at my baby! He’s so cute!”

Server: “Yes! How lovely.”

Woman: “Look at how he’s dressed up! So cute!”

Server: “Aww.”

(The woman continues to talk about how cute her baby is for a minute, oblivious to the fact that I am waiting to order. There is now also another customer in line behind me.)

Server: “Er, did you want to order anything?”

Woman: “Oh, no, I just wanted to show you my baby.” *walks out of shop*


Peppered With Inequality

| Evansville, IN, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I am working in the drive-thru for a rather popular fast food joint.)

Me: “Welcome to [Store]! What can I get you?”

Customer: “I’ll have a [Combo Number] with a [static garble] and a [name of soda that has a Ph.D.].

Me: “All right, one [Combo] with a Dr. [Soda]. Is that correct?”

Customer: “Well, you can call it that.”

Me: “What did you mean, ‘You can call it that’?”

Customer: “I call it Nurse [Soda] ‘cause nurse is the female form of doctor. Girl Power!”

Me: “You know there are female doctors, right?”


Some Prefer Their Customers Toothless

| TN, USA | Bizarre

(I work as a shift leader at a well known fast food restaurant. As part of my duties, whenever a customer calls with a complaint or question, I do my absolute best to try and resolve it. Sometimes though, that can mean going to surprising lengths.)

Me: “[Restaurant], this is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yes. Would you go check your play area?”

Me: “Sure! Do you mind my asking what I’m looking for?”

Caller: “I think I left a… parcel in there, wrapped up in a napkin.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. Did you say a ‘parcel’?”

Caller: “Yes!”

(Even though our customers are generally better than most, we still have the occasional drug addict or homeless person wander in. At the word “parcel,” my mind immediately suggests either heroin or marijuana.)

Me: “All right, ma’am. One moment, please.”

(I take a quick look through our kids area, but the “parcel” wrapped in napkins is nowhere to be found.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I don’t see anything.”

Caller: *sighs* “Well, would you look through the trash, then? I wouldn’t normally bother, but these were very expensive!”

(She still hasn’t told me what I’m looking for yet. Hoping to give her a quick “no”, I start rifling through our very full trash can. I’m about to give her the news when my eye spots a wadded up napkin. I grab it, carefully unwrap it, and lo and behold, it’s a pair of shiny new dentures!)

Me: “All right, ma’am, I think I’ve found it. Is it… um, is it teeth?”

Caller: “YES! Oh, fantastic! I’ll be right over!”

(After vigorously washing my hands, I re-wrap the “teeth” and stash it behind the counter. A tall, weathered looking gentleman walks through the door.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Man: “Actually, I’m…. I hate to say this, but I’m here for the teeth…”

(I smiled, wordlessly picked up the “parcel,” and handed it to him. He left with a skip in his step, and I never saw him again!)


In A Late-Night Pickle

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Time

(The restaurant I work at used to be open 24 hours but now we close at 1 am. This has been going on for 5 or 6 months now. All the signs around the building have been changed to reflect this. The outside lights are off and the only employees are myself doing paperwork and the person getting the place ready for the morning shift. I get a call at 1:50 am.)

Me: “[Restaurant].”

Caller: “I’m at the drive-thru but no one is taking my order.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we are closed right now.”

Caller: “But you’re supposed to be open right now. Google says you are 24 hours.”

Me: “We have not been 24 hours for a few months now.”

Caller: “But you’re still here.”

Me: “Everything has been put a way for the night and I’m just here to finish up for the day.”

Caller: “Can I just have some pickles?”


Being Nice Is Free

| Jeffersonville, IN, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I’m unfortunately with the person who is causing this scene. The fast food place is closed on the inside due to a leak of some sort in the lobby, so only the drive-thru is open. It’s the busy time of day and the line is very long but I have no problem waiting. I’m in the car with my step-dad, who is one of those entitled people, and regardless of where he goes thinks he deserves something free. When we finally get up to the window, he starts shouting at the poor lady.)

Step-Dad: “I should get something for free for you making me wait so long. What are you going to give me for free? Give me a Diet [Soda]. I’ll take that for no charge since you made me wait so long.”

Employee: “You know, sir, I have no problem with that at all if you could just ask nicely instead of saying that you ‘should’ get something for free. I apologize for the wait; our lobby is closed, we are doing the best we can, and we are also currently understaffed.”

Step-Dad: “I don’t care! You made me wait! So I SHOULD get something for free, and it’s not my problem you are understaffed; hire more people!”

Employee: “Again I apologize. I will get you a drink for no charge, but if you were nicer with the way you treat people, it would go a lot further for you.”

(I really was hoping she would give him nothing, and just dump the soda on him because he didn’t deserve it and I could tell she was already stressed out, I assume, from people all day yelling just about the same thing. I called and asked to speak with her as soon as I got home and apologized to her for his behavior and that she did nothing to deserve that. She was very sweet and said the two cars ahead of us had been the same way, and many other people throughout the day. The car ahead of us had even thrown something at her. I told her to keep up the excellent work they were doing and try to stay positive, and that I thought she should have just thrown the soda at him, so we had a good laugh about that. I wish I could have offered her more than an apology for him, but it was the best I could do. I just hope it somehow helped to keep her day from being ruined by him, and other people like him, because she, or anyone in her position, doesn’t deserve to be treated that way.)

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