Pancakes In Human Form

, , , , , | | Friendly | May 12, 2019

My grandmother told this story several times. She was born in the 1920s and survived World War 2 with her family intact — as far as she let us know, anyway. One of her favourite stories is when she and her older sister were sent out for food during the dire Hunger Winter of 1945.

She and her sister were sent out to several farms for food. The first farm had pity on them and the nice farmer wife decided to treat these poor hungry ones to some delicious pancakes! My grandmother and her sister were delighted and they ate as much as they were offered. Then, they continued their journey.

The next farm also offered a bit of food for home and those farmers had pity on the young girls as well. The farmer’s wife decided to give them something delicious: egg pancakes — more eggs than normal pancakes. My grandmother and her sister did not want to be rude, and ate as much as they could. They thanked the couple for the meal and went to their last stop, a family member’s farm, at which they would also spend the night.

“You poor things; you look famished! But I made something special for you: bacon pancakes!”

My grandmother and her sister did not dare to tell the truth and yes, again, ate as much as they could. They spent the night on the outhouse as a tag-team and they overheard their family members discussing how rude they were! Even after they confessed the truth, they were still considered “the rudest Choosing Beggars” — even by their parents! — as we’d call it nowadays.

Left The Farm… And The Reservation

, , , | Right | March 18, 2019

(I am working in a farm shop as a student. The shop is located close to a farm but is independent of them from an administrative point of view — just selling some of their products amongst others. The shop is always full of posh people willing to buy local and organic products. I am alone in charge of everything, and ten people are queuing, when some weird lady opens the door of the shop:)

Customer: “I saw a dead pigeon outside the shop.”

Me: “Yes, and?”

Customer: “It has clear signs of poisoning.”

Me: “I don’t know; everything outside our shop does not depend on us because it’s part of the farm, so I cannot tell you.”

(I go back to my customers, but she comes to me again, screaming.)

Customer: “You kill pigeons!”

Me: “I don’t. I have nothing to do with this. Miss, I have many other customers waiting; may I proceed?”

Customer: “You work in this shop; you are responsible!”

Me: “This really does not depend on me. Please go ask the farm responsible about this.”

Customer: *furiously* “I WILL NEVER BUY YOUR PRODUCTS!” *slams the door*

When It Comes To Animal Welfare, They’re Not Horsing Around

, , , | Healthy | March 14, 2019

(I am home alone on our farm one afternoon — my family is out on errands — and there is a knock on the door. When I open the door, a man is standing there and there’s an SPCA van in the driveway.)

SPCA: “Hello, miss. We’ve had a complaint put forth about your animal welfare.”

Me: “What?!”

SPCA: “That horse over there.”

(He pointed at a horse in the field that my mum had taken in from a neighbour who was going to send her to the glue factory — yup, that’s really a thing. She was clearly sickly and dying, but we were giving her the best life we could until she passed, something her previous owner had no intention of doing. It was a serious charge and took almost a week to clear up… and $200 to get the vet out and write a note that we were giving her all the care she needed.)

Unfiltered Story #137026

, , | Unfiltered | January 18, 2019

(the apple bags are paper and commonly rip, so we offer to tie a plastic bag around it in case it rips.)
Me: Do you want the apples in a bag?
Customer: What? It’s in a bag (gestures to bag).
Me:I know but it could rip and you’re apples might fall out
Customer: That’s ridiculous! This bag is perfectly fine!
Me:Okay, have a nice day..
(customer picks up the bag, it rips, and all the apples fall on the ground)
Me: And that’s why we use bags

Unfiltered Story #135446

, , | Unfiltered | January 5, 2019

Talked to a crazy person from Illinois.
(customer) ‘Where are you located?
(me) ‘We’re about 10 miles north of the Iowa border”
(customer) ” I haven’t heard of that; is the somewhere up North?”
(me) ……..”The state of Iowa”

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