Too Much Plate On Your Plate

, , , , | Working | October 3, 2017

(I work in the dining room of an assisted living home as a waitress. My manager is a super great guy who trusts his employees and is usually laid back. This all changes whenever he has to work the line though, which is fortunately a rare occurrence. One night the head chef calls out sick, so the manager works the line. He comes by me, carrying a stack of 20 incredibly heavy plates.)

Me: “Whoa! Hey, those are really heavy. You should probably limit yourself to ten at a time, at most.”

Manager: “They are not that heavy, and I’m out of plates. I need as many as possible! This saves me time!”

Supervisor: “[My Name] is right; you—”

Manager: “Just because you two have trouble lifting things doesn’t mean the plates are heavy! Now grab your dishes and go!”

(My supervisor and I share a look, but we both silently decide to drop it. We grab our plates from the line and drop them off at the tables. As I’m walking back, I hear an enormous crash and I run back to see what happened. The entire kitchen floor is covered in shattered pieces of ceramic. My manager is standing in the middle of it, staring down at the broken ceramic, completely flabbergasted. My supervisor rushes in behind me.)

Supervisor: “What happened?”

Manager: *sheepishly* “The plates fell…”

Supervisor: “How many were you carrying?”

Manager: *looking like he wishes he could disappear* “Twenty…”

Supervisor: *sighs* “[Coworker], go grab the brush and dustpan, and clean this up. [My Name], go get [Manager] some plates from [Dishwasher]. [Manager], go back to the line and don’t leave until service is over.”

Manager: *muttering while sulking off* “But the plates aren’t that heavy…”

(He wasn’t allowed to carry plates after that.)

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Never Rains But It Pours

, , , , | Right | October 3, 2017

Me: “Hi! Can I help you find anything today?”

Customer: “I’d like to return this visor I bought yesterday. It fell apart after I only wore it one time.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. Did you want to exchange it for another item?”

Customer: “No, I just want my money back.”

Me: “Okay, not a problem. May I ask how the visor is damaged?”

(She proceeds to pull out a soaking wet, flimsy grass visor.)

Customer: “I only got to wear it today; once it started raining, it stopped working!”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s a grass sun visor that isn’t meant to get wet.”

Customer: “But it’s supposed to hold up longer than just one day!”

Me: “And it does hold up for longer than a day, when used for its intended use of blocking the sun.”

(She then ran out in a huff because I wouldn’t refund her money for the damaged sun visor that she wore in the rain.)

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Will Be Here Until We’re Eighty

, , , , | Working | October 3, 2017

(I’m the dumb employee in this story. I’m working as a cashier, and having just started the new job a week earlier, I’m not familiar with all of it yet. The customer has a huge pile of paper trash bags that are tied with a string. I assume I have to count them all since each bag has an individual bar code.)

Me: “Do you know how many bags there are in this?”

Customer: “Sorry; no.”

Me: “I’ll just have to count them then.”

Customer: “Okay.”

(I start counting and am getting near to seventy when I’m interrupted.)

Customer: “I can the see the price tag on the shelf from here; it says 80 bags.”

Me: “Oh, thanks!”

(At this point, I finally read the barcode, not having done so before.)

Me: “Oh. It says 80 on the computer. I didn’t need to count them. I’m sorry!”

Customer: “New, aren’t you?”

(Luckily, they were understanding and didn’t start an angry rant.)

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Those Who Teach, Can’t

, , , , | Learning | October 3, 2017

(I am in a concurrent education program, and I am about to start my last year at the school. As we are all excited for the upcoming teachers college program, I see a lot of new status updates about it. One catches my eye:)

Friend: “Tomorrow will be the last first day of school, ever, for me. I am so thankful to have made it this far, and so excited for what comes next. #teacherscollege”

Me: “You do realize that, as teachers, we are going to have many more first days of school to come; don’t you?”

(She quickly deleted the post.)

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My Partner Is Not So Smart (Phone)

, , , , , , | Romantic | October 3, 2017

(I have just gotten a new cellphone, and am entering numbers into it.)

Girlfriend: “You should put your number in there, in case you lose it!”

Me: “Good idea!” *I start to add a new number, then stop.* “Wait… how would that help me?”

Girlfriend: “Well, if you left your phone here, I could call you!”

Me: “But if I put the number into my phone… and you have my phone… how will you call me?”

Girlfriend: “By calling your number!”

Me: “But if you’re calling my phone, and you HAVE MY PHONE…”

(We went back and forth a couple more times before she realized that putting my cell number in my cell wouldn’t be as useful as she first thought.)

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