Going To Hell For Leather For This Sale

, , , , | | Working | May 23, 2018

(My mother takes my siblings and me out to dinner. Afterward, we decide to visit a nearby shoe store because both my sister and brother are in desperate need of new shoes. It should be noted that my sister doesn’t like to eat certain meats, like veal, or wear leather.)

Mom: “I think [Sister] should try on the shoes you got here last time, [My Name]. Do you know which ones they are?”

Me: “Yeah, they’re these.” *points to them*

Sister: *turns to associate* “Are they made of leather?”

Associate: “Yeah, most of our walking shoes are made of leather.”

Sister: *visibly disappointed* “Oh, I don’t want those, then. I can’t wear leather. I—”

Associate: “Oh, it’s okay! These are ‘young buck,’ so it’s like baby leather!”

Ranger Danger!

, , , , , | | Working | May 23, 2018

(I am working as a park ranger in a state park when one day another new ranger and I are tasked with cleaning up a section of a river. A great deal of trash has washed down the river and has collected on the banks. We are sent down with a truck and trash bags to clean everything up. About an hour into the project, my coworker starts loudly sighing and moving at a snail’s pace.)

Coworker: “Is this good?”

Me: “Huh?”

Coworker: “Is this good enough? Can we stop?”

(I look around. There is still a great deal of trash around us. This is a popular hiking area and the public is often in this area. Things still look awful.)

Me: “Uh, no. We can’t stop until all the trash in the water is picked up.”

Coworker: “But won’t it just get washed down?”

Me: “What? What do you mean?”

Coworker: “If we leave it, won’t it just get washed away? What’s the point of picking it up?”

(I am shocked by what this park ranger has just said.)

Me: “God, no! If this washes down, it will spread to other parts of the river and eventually get into the bay! Why would that be a good idea?”

Coworker: “Then it wouldn’t be our problem!”

(I have no idea how this person got hired with ideas like that floating around in their head.)

Refunder Blunder, Part 35

, , , | | Right | May 23, 2018

(I’m a cash lead, which is basically the supervisor of all cashiers. A cashier calls me over.)

Me: “What’s up?”

Cashier: “She wants to return all these items, but she doesn’t have any of the items with her. We can’t do that, can we?”

(It’s a long receipt, with dozens of panties and expensive bras, and dozens of other items, totaling over $100.)

Me: *dumbfounded* “No… She needs them here to return them.”

Cashier: “Can you tell her that?”

Me: *looks to customer* “Ma’am, we can’t do a return without the items; we need to have them here.”

Customer: *talking to me as if I’M the idiot* “Well, they’ve done it for me before!”

Me: “No, ma’am, that’s not possible. If you want to return them, we need our items back.”

Customer: “I don’t want to bring them; I just want my money back.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we’re not going to do that for you.”

Customer: “FINE!” *leaves, very annoyed*

Refunder Blunder, Part 34
Refunder Blunder, Part 33
Refunder Blunder, Part 32

This Behavior Is Foreign To Me

, , , , | | Right | May 22, 2018

(We have a notoriously nasty client who calls about once or twice a week, known as “Mr. F****** Foreigners Guy.” He basically calls to yell and scream at the person he gets through to, stating that he will not talk to f****** foreigners who take Norwegian people’s jobs and ruin Norway. The kicker is, however, that almost every single person he has talked to at our call center is a native Norwegian with a very common Norwegian name. We also know what his problem is, and what is causing it, but none of us have been able to get through to him as he just yells and screams. This day, I am training a new hire. He is originally from Iraq, and he has a very foreign-sounding name. However, he grew up in Sweden and he speaks Swedish. Note that Swedish and Norwegian are similar languages, and we understand each other well, but it is still VERY clear that it is not the same language. I’m listening to the new hire’s calls when we get Mr. F****** Foreigners Guy on the phone.)

New Hire: *in Swedish* “Welcome to [Company]! My name is [New Hire]. How can I help you?”

F****** Foreigners Guy: “OH. MY. GOD. I can’t f****** believe this!”

(I immediately recognize his voice and get ready to terminate the call. However:)

F****** Foreigners Guy:Finally, a true Norwegian person! With a real Norwegian name and all! You have no idea how many times I had to talk to all these f****** foreigners just to get to you!”

New Hire: *confused out of this world, still speaking Swedish* “Uh… I’m sorry to hear that, sir. What can I help you with?

(And just like that, Mr. F****** Foreigners Guy was the nicest person ever, and got his problem fixed by our new hire. We never heard from him after that, and to this day we still have no idea how a self proclaimed “Norwegian Nationalist” could not tell the difference between Norwegian and Swedish!)

Got To Hand It To Preemptiveness

, , , , | | Learning | May 22, 2018

(I’m in second grade when the 2009 H1N1 flu virus breaks out. My friend’s mother tells this story. Her daughter is in first grade at the time of the outbreak. Her mother decides to bring hand sanitizer for her class. She approaches a receptionist at the front office, and this conversation happens.)

Friend’s Mom: “Am I allowed to bring in hand sanitizer for my daughter’s classroom?”

Receptionist: “Sorry, we cannot allow this. It has alcohol in it and the children could accidentally drink it.”

(The next week, there was an announcement in the weekly flyer saying that hand sanitizer was required for all classrooms!)

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