What Do You Mean?

, , , , | Right | April 19, 2018

(I manage a very popular athletic shoe store. A lady in her mid to late fifties comes in with her two grown sons, one of whom I recognize from the summer camp for autistic individuals where I volunteer.)

Customer: “Can you help my son?”

Me: “Yes, of course. What can I do for you?”

Customer: “He needs these in a size 9.5 wide.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we only carry standard width. But this style runs a little wide; would he like to try them, anyway, just in case?”

Customer: “[Son], do you really want them?”

Son: “Uh-huh.”

Customer: “No, I don’t think he wants them. We will try a size 9.5, though. And a 13 in this one for my other son.”

(I go in back and find the shoes, and when I come out I set both boxes on the bench.)

Me: “Here is the size 13, but unfortunately I didn’t have a 9.5 in the other one. I brought out a 10, though; would you like to give it a shot?”

Customer: “Where is the 13?”

Me: “Right here, ma’am.”

Customer: “Don’t be rude! Let my son get this one in 9.5, instead.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. That’s the same shoe. I only had 10, remember?”

Customer: “That is not the same shoe; open your eyes. This one is a little higher.”

(I take both shoes from the shelf and hold them side by side.)

Me: “No, I’m afraid they are the exact same. I can maybe check to see if we have 9.5 in the other color, though?”

Customer: “Son, do you really want the size 10?”

Son: “Uh-huh!”

Customer: “Okay. I will take the 13 and the 10.”

(I take the shoes to the register and ring her up. After she pays…)

Customer: “Why were you so mean to me?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “You were so mean to me. You are just like my husband. He is so mean to me, and then when I get angry, he says that I am the one being mean. Why would you be so mean to me? I am a customer. I spend thousands of dollars here; I am in here every week. You shouldn’t be mean to me.”

(This is the first time I’ve ever seen her, and she has only let her sons look at clearance shoes.)

Me: “I apologize if I came across as mean, ma’am. I am suffering from really terrible allergies, so my voice is a little harsh.”

Customer: “No, you are just a mean-spirited girl. I don’t think my son wants these after all. I want to return them.”

Me: “Okay, I just need to take some information to do a return. Can I get your first and last name, and your phone number?”

Customer: “So you can call me and Goggle me and keep being mean? I don’t think so! Just give me my money back!”

(Yes, she did say, “Goggle.” I did the return, just for the sake of getting her out of my store. My district manager called later to say that he received a complaint about me, but never found out what the complaint was because the caller started accusing him of being mean to her.)


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Doesn’t Make Ad-Sense

, , , , , , , , | Right | December 4, 2017

(A call comes in ten minutes before closing:)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Restaurant], this is [My Name] speaking, how can I help you?”

Irate Caller: “I cannot believe that you would expose my children to such inappropriate television advertisements! This whole [new company slogan] is exposing my daughters to [oral sex], and they are only four and six years old. I should report you to the FCC!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but you are calling a local franchise location. The national corporate office creates the all advertisements, and we don’t have any say in it. I can help you get in contact with them, if you would like.”

Irate Caller: “Well, if you cared about your customers at all, you would take down those disgusting ads right now!”

Me: “Sir, I’m a local supervisor; I have no control over television ads. However, the number for [Restaurant]’s corporate office is [number]. We don’t have any interaction with them, other than buying our supplies, so you need to call them in the morning. I’m sure they can tell you who can help you.”

Irate Caller: “I’ve never seen such horrible things in my life, and you won’t help me. You’re harming my four- and six-year-olds, and all you will do is tell me to talk to someone else in the morning. I want these ads taken down now! I don’t want them to show up on my TV again.”

Me: “Sir, in all honestly, you’re just calling the wrong number. You need to call the corporate office. I’m sure they can help you.”

Irate Caller: “If you cared about your job, you would care about me! What lousy customer service! Don’t you even care about my daughters? Fix this now!!!!”

Me: “Sir, I’m a 19-year-old college student, working at a fast food joint making [just over minimum wage] an hour. I would love to help you, but I have absolutely no say over what is on television. I wouldn’t even know who to call to ask them to stop broadcasting them. Personally, I agree with you. I don’t like the new slogan. I think it’s dumb and I also think it’s inappropriate. However, I can’t help you; only the corporate office can.”

Irate Caller: “If you agree with me, why won’t you help me? I’m going to get you fired and, then sue for exposing my kids to [oral sex]! It’s not right what you’re doing.”

Me: “Okay, sir, if you call the corporate office, they can put you in contact with their legal department.”

Irate Caller: “Why are you doing this to my kids, you [swear word]?”

Me: “Sir, it is time for me to close the restaurant. I cannot help you and I really need to go. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you, but if you call the corporate office, I’m sure you can find someone with the authority to help. Do you need me to repeat the number?”

Irate Caller: “You know you’re going to Hell, right?” *slams down the phone*


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