Not Genderalizing The Issue

, , , , | Working | October 12, 2017

(I’m at the checkout of a supermarket.)

Cashier: “Will that be cash or card today, sir— Oh, umm… miss?”

Me: “I— uh, what?”

Cashier: *huffs* “I’m sorry. We’re supporting our manager who’s come out as agender, so we’re not assuming the gender of anyone we serve today to bring attention to the issues of non-binary individuals.”

Me: “That actually sounds quite interesting, but isn’t using female pronouns automatically assuming that my gender is female?”

Cashier: “No, because you’re a guy, so I referred to you as a woman.”

Me: “Aren’t you assuming my gender then, anyway?”

Cashier: *deer in the headlights moment* “OH, MY GOD!”

Me: “Don’t get me wrong; I think what you’re trying to do is a good thing, but it’s more for highlighting transgender issues than issues affecting the wider non-binary community.”

Cashier: *tears forming in her eyes* “I… I don’t know what to say. I’ve messed up. I don’t really understand any of it.”

Me: “I don’t think many out there will hold it against you. Admitting you don’t understand is a big step forward. Maybe ask what pronouns people would like to be referred to as, or just use the neutral ‘they’ and ‘them,’ etc.”

Cashier: “Oh, I will. Thank you. So, umm, what pronouns would you like me to use?”

Me: “Male is fine. I’m agender, too, actually, but I don’t care enough to really bother. I just go with whatever people use for me.”

(Her face lit up and we finished my purchase. It was nice thing to see people trying to bring attention to such issues. It made my week.)

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Sword In The Stone-Faced Grandma

, , , , , , | Right | October 12, 2017

Little Girl: “But, Granny, why can’t I have the sword?”

Granny: “Because swords are for boys and you’re a girl, so have the [Doll] instead.” *gestures to me* “I’m sure that she had [Doll]s as a girl.”

Me: “Actually, I had cowboy pistols and a [Gaming Console].” *while handing sword to the little girl* “Be careful ruling the high seas!”

(Granny was furious.)

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A Penny Dreadful

, , , , | Right | October 11, 2017

(I work in a campsite general store. A camper comes in and picks up a quarter-pound of loose-leaf tea and brings it to the counter.)

Me: “That will be £1.11.”

Customer: “£1.11! It’s 95 pence where I come from!”

Me: “Well, you should have stayed there.”

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Strap On Some More Creativity To Your Next Prank

, , , , , | Right | October 11, 2017

Me: “Hello, [Library]. How can I help you?”

Woman: “Yes, I’m wondering if you’ve found some lost property.”

Me: “I can check. What was the item you lost?

Woman: “A big, black strap-on.”

Me: “Could you repeat that please?”

Woman: “A strap-on.”

Me: *deciding to see if I could wind them up in return* “I’m not sure what that is.”

Woman: “Well, it’s big and black… Are you sure you don’t know what it is?”

Me: *trying not to laugh or give the game away* “No, could you tell me more about it? What is it used for?”

Woman: “It’s a toy.”

Me: “So, you lost this in the children’s library?”

Woman: *sounding a bit put out* “No! Why would it be there?”

Me: “You said it was a toy.”

Woman: “But…”

Me: “Let me just go and have a look in our lost property drawer.”

(I put the call on hold, waited ten seconds, and disconnected the call.)

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Unfiltered Story #97368

| Unfiltered | October 11, 2017

The café I work at does a lot of cakes, scones etc to serve for cream and afternoon teas. A large family comes in and starts ordering the (clearly labelled) cakes.

Customer: What are your scones for the cream tea?

Me: We do sultana or cherry and walnut.

Customer pauses, then says: I see. And what’s the difference between them?

I honestly don’t know how I kept a straight face whilst explaining that the sultana ones contained sultanas and the cherry and walnut contained cherries and walnuts…