This Place Is Not High-ly Recommended

, , , , , | Working | January 16, 2018

(I’m at a fast food place known for their tacos, etc. It’s a little after midnight and I pull into the drive-thru.)

Employee: *giggles* “Hi, welcome to [Restaurant]. Unfortunately, we, uh… we don’t have any food right now.”

Me: “No food, eh?”

Employee: *giggling more* “Nope. We, uh, didn’t get… the truck… Should be here in a few hours.”

Me: “I see.”

Employee: “So, uh…”

Me: “Yeah, I’ll go somewhere else.”

(I have worked in a few fast food places before, and I find it hard to imagine that a place like that was completely out of everything they offered. I’m pretty sure they were high and just didn’t want to make any food. But since I was also just looking for some munchies, I decided not to call corporate or make a scene. I just went to a different fast food place and called it a night.)

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There’s No Making Up From This

, , , , , , | Working | January 16, 2018

(This happens on my birthday when I am at the mall with my best friend, who is a professional makeup artist. We decide to stop a well-known makeup store because I need new foundation and concealer. I also want to try to a new bronzer, and I want my friend’s advice on which shades to choose based on my skin tone. Neither of us have any makeup on, and as soon as we walk into the store, a nearby associate looks us up and down before walking up to us.)

Sales Associate: “Do you girls need help finding anything?”

Me: “Oh, no, thank you! We’re just looking around!”

(The sales associate walks back to the front of the store, and as we walk over to find the foundation, concealer, and bronzer I want to try, I hear the associate whisper to another associate to keep an eye on us because we look suspicious. When we finally find what we are looking for, we notice that the color we need in foundation isn’t on the shelf, so we go over to the group of sales associates, who are chatting in a circle.)

Me: *smiling* “Could someone please help us?”

(The sales associates ignore me and continue their conversation as if they never heard us, so my friend decides to try to get their attention.)

Friend: “Hi. Could someone please check to see if there is a product on the shelf?”

(Finally, after a couple of minutes of these sales associates ignoring us, one finally looks at us and sighs, then breaks away from the group.)

Sales Associate: *very rudely* “What do you ladies need?”

Me: “I was wondering if you could help us; there’s no [Expensive Brand] in the color ‘light’ on the shelves. We were wondering if you could check in the back to see if you had it?”

Sales Associate: “I’m sorry, but if it’s not on the shelf it’s not in the back; we’re out. And besides, that shade is not your color.”

Me: *politely* “I don’t mind if it’s not in my color. Could you still check to make sure?

Sales Associate: “I guess, but I’m telling you: it’s not back there.”

(She looks me up and down before leaving and we stand there for ten minutes waiting for her. When she doesn’t return, we decide to look around, and a couple of minutes later, the sales associate finally walks up to us with the product we want in her hand.)

Sales Associate: “This is our last one. Are you sure you ladies can even afford these products?”

(We stand there in shock, looking at her and not knowing what to say. The associate smirks at us and hands us the foundation, then walks off. Part of me wants to put the product back and walk out without giving them my business, but the other part of me really wants to buy it, since it’s the last one there, so we go to the register. To our luck, we get the same rude associate who helped us on the floor. I silently put the things on the counter and she looks at us in disbelief.)

Sales Associate: “There is no way you’re getting these.”

Me: “Yes, I am. I would like to purchase these, please.”

Sales Associate: “You both know nothing about makeup; these aren’t your shade. You’re too poor to afford these.”

Friend: “I am a professional makeup artist and have been working in the makeup industry for thirty years, so I obviously have more experience than you. Just because we’re not wearing makeup doesn’t mean we can’t afford these items or don’t know anything about it.”

Sales Associate: “I highly doubt that; you’re not buying these items.”

(I am tired of this associate’s attitude, so I finally ask to speak to a manager, and the associate smirks and picks up the phone.)

Sales Associate: *very rudely* “I am sorry to bother you with another problem, but these two customers are complaining and want to speak to you.”

(The manager comes out and we explain the situation, the poor service the associate has been giving us, and how she is refusing to let us buy the products we want because she doesn’t think we can afford them. The manager makes the associate ring us out while she watches. The total of everything we purchase together is over $400, and when she sees us pull out the exact amount in cash, the sales associate’s attitude changes from rude to friendly.)

Sales Associate: *smiling* “I am so sorry for the misunderstanding. Here’s your change. Please come back to shop with us soon!”

Me: *smiling* “I won’t be coming back. You should probably learn how to be more polite towards customers instead of judging them based on whether or not they have makeup on.”

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Making A Beautiful Mocha-ry Of It

, , , , , | Working | January 15, 2018

(My mother and I are driving home from a long trip. It is evening and we still have a ways to go, so we decide to go through the drive-thru of a nearby coffee shop. Note that the time is about 15 minutes to close for this location.)

Order Taker: *in a bad accent* “Hola! What can I giggity-get started for you?”

Mom: *chuckles* “Two mochas, please; hold the whipped cream.”

Order Taker: “That’s two chocos minus the sweet top. Anything else?”

Mom: “No, that’s all.”

Order Taker: “Bea-ooootiful. That’ll be 80 kabillion dollars at the next window.”

(My mom and I cracked up laughing. Thanks, silly order taker, for making our long drive a little less tiring!)

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Look Dead On The Inside

, , , , , | Working | January 15, 2018

(In preparation for an overseas trip, I’m getting my passport photo taken. Note that the usual requirements as far as expression are either a neutral expression or a natural smile.)

Mom: “Smile for the camera!”

Employee: “You don’t have to do that. Just pretend you’re at the DMV!”

(It took me a bit to stop laughing enough to actually take the photo.)

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Crochet Away

, , , , , | Romantic | January 14, 2018

(I come up to the checkout with a few bundles of yarn and a crochet needle.)

Cashier: “Ooh, you crochet?”

Me: “Not really. My mum made a lot of my clothes as a toddler. I thought I’d challenge myself and see how hard it is.”

Cashier: “That’s nice.”

(She scans my items.)

Cashier: “So, my brother’s single, and he’s looking for a boyfriend.”

Me: *not really paying attention* “Is he?”

Cashier: “So…?”

Me: “Card, please.”

Cashier: “No, silly! My brother.”

Me: “What about him?”

Cashier: “Are you interested?”

Me: “Not really. I have a wife and kids.”

Cashier: “You aren’t a very convincing straight man, coming in here and buying your pretty things! I clocked the man-obsession the second you walked in.”

(I start walking to the exit.)

Cashier: *practically screaming* “Wait, don’t you want your things?”

Me: “I’ll look elsewhere, thanks.”

Cashier: “COME BACK ANYTIME! AND LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU COME OUT. MY BROTHER WILL STILL BE SINGLE!”

(I looked elsewhere, and in the end managed to make a decent looking beanie. My wife immediately stole it. I didn’t even get the chance to try it on.)

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