Money Talks

, , , , , , | Right | December 5, 2017

(My friends and I are at [Amusement Park]. We stop at a shop that sells sweatshirts so my friend can buy one. We have gotten some of the currency that [Amusement Park] produces; we have $20 dollar bills with popular cartoon characters on the backs.)

Friend: *going up to the counter to pay for the sweatshirt* “Do you guys take [Park Currency]?”

Employee #1: “Yes, we do!”

(While the first employee is behind the counter, a second employee comes up next to my friend and takes the money out of my friend’s hand and holds it up for all to see.)

Employee #2: “Look! Real Money!”

Friend: *confused* “Uh…”

Employee #2: *pulls his pant leg tight so we can see the outline of his knee brace* “Don’t worry; I can’t run away with it, anyway. I probably can’t even run to the end of this counter!” *gives back the money*

(My friend and I had a good laugh with him and all employees at that store. They were great! The store was pretty empty, so we stayed and chatted awhile while browsing.)

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Schadenfreude

, , , , , , | Working | December 5, 2017

(Our vacuum cleaner has died on us, so my dad and I go shopping for a new one. We go to an appliance store. I’m a young teen at the time. A salesperson starts showing us various models.)

Salesperson: “And here we have a Sauber.”

Me: “Huh. German for ‘clean,’ right?”

Salesperson: “Yeah. You speak German?”

Me: “Not fluently, but decently well.”

Salesperson: “Dein Vater is doof.” (“Your father is stupid.”)

(He then winks at me, like I should find him hilarious. I don’t.)

Me: “So does my Dad.”

Dad: “Ich möchte zu dein Geschäftsführer sprachen, bitte.” (“I would like to talk to your manager, please.”)

(We had a lovely talk with the manager about employees who like to call their customers stupid, especially to their own kids, even if they’re doing it in another language. We went elsewhere to buy our new vacuum, so I don’t know what happened after, but I can’t imagine that the employee stayed long at his job.)

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No One Knows What’s In Store

, , , , , | Working | December 4, 2017

(I’m the dumb employee in this story. I work at a craft supply store, but I used to work at a home improvement store. It was only a matter of time until something like this happened.)

Me: *answering the phone* “Thank you for calling [Home Improvement Store]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Wait, this is [Home Improvement Store]? I thought I was calling [Craft Store]!”

Me: “Oh, God. Yes. It is. You are. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “You used to work at [Home Improvement Store], didn’t you?”

Me: “What told you?”

(The customer asks whether we carry a specific item. I tell him we do, and that is that… until about half an hour later, when a man walks in with a big grin on his face and spots me at the front end.)

Customer: “IS THIS [HOME IMPROVEMENT STORE]?”

(It was the same guy! I’m pretty sure I turned bright red, but I also laughed.)

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Learning Vietnamese Should Only Take A Day

, , , , , | Working | December 3, 2017

(I’m getting a SIM card in Thailand. I am ethnic Chinese with an American passport. I am learning Vietnamese so I put my phone to Vietnamese. Though I can only read 10%, I am trying to force myself to learn the rest, since I generally know what it should say. The conversation is in English unless stated.)

Employee: “Passport, please, and your phone?”

Me: “Here you go.”

Employee: *in Vietnamese* “SIM card… inside…”

Me: *in Vietnamese* “Oh, my Vietnamese isn’t very good.” *in English* “English, please?”

Employee: “Idiot. Then why use Vietnamese phone?!” *rolls eyes*

Me: *pause* “I’m learning it, too? I’m still a beginner.”

Employee: “Not good enough. If you learn it, learn it well!”

(He continued to glare at me, so I quickly got it done and left. I’m not sure what his problem was; perhaps some political/ethnicity nonsense?)

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The Power Of A Name

, , , , , | Working | December 2, 2017

(I stop by the food court at my local mall to get lunch and choose a burger place. Everything is totally normal. I get my drink and wait for my food. They call my name, I get my bag, and it’s only after I sit down to eat that I realize something is wrong; I got my fries, but instead of a burger, there is a container of chicken nuggets. I glance at the receipt I got with the bag to confirm that it does indeed say I was charged for a burger combo, and then go back up. I’m nearly 40 years old, and none of the employees can be much over 20, mostly teenagers.)

Me: *walking up to the counter* “I’m sorry; I don’t think this is my food—”

(The employee doesn’t acknowledge me, but starts talking through the window to the guy in the kitchen. That’s fine; they’re busy, it’s loud, she may not have heard me before she started talking, and it sounds like they’re talking about orders, not just chatting. I wait for her to finish.)

Me: “Hi, sorry; this isn’t my or—”

(The employee practically shoves a new bag into my hands, fixes me with a disapproving stare, and says in her most weary, chiding voice…)

Employee: “Yes, because YOU took the order meant for [My Name].”

Me: “Yeah, because I’m [My Name]!”

Employee: *eyes get huge* “Oh! We… we must have mixed up the bags.”

Me: “Uh-huuuuh! How about that?!”

(I really wasn’t annoyed until she addressed me like a misbehaving toddler!)

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