(I am grading a test my fifth graders have taken on types of sentences.)
Question #1: “Write an interrogative sentence.”
Student’s Answer #1: “Do you know where [Classmate] put the cookies at?”
Question #2: “Write an imperative sentence.”
Student’s Answer #2: “Go get [Classmate] so he can tell me where they are.”
Question #3: “Write a declarative sentence.”
Student’s Answer #3: “I really like cookies when they are fresh out of the oven.”
Question #4: “Write an exclamatory sentence.”
Student’s Answer #4: “What good cookies these are!”
(I’ve just finished a two-month internship in a mixed preschool/elementary group. The kids and teachers are wonderful, but there have been a few serious incidents within the group. Even though I’ve been stressed to the point of nosebleeds, I’m happy to assist the teachers even after my internship has finished. I’m feeling quite harassed this early morning as we’re walking with the six year olds to the local library, but I still walk with a troubled boy who’s also had a rough couple of weeks. We’re passing an apartment complex where a few men are spring-cleaning the grass with leaf blowers.)
Little Boy: “What are they doing [My Name]?”
Me: “They’re cleaning the leaves away.”
Little Boy: “Why?”
Me: “So the lawn will look pretty.”
Little Boy: “Why?”
Me: “So that it’s nice and ready for spring.”
Little Boy: “Why?”
Me: “That’s when all the flowers come out.”
Little Boy: “Why do people want flowers out?”
Me: “Because they’re beautiful.”
Little Boy: “Just like you, [My Name]!”
(All the stress is forgotten.)
(I walk into a classroom and see one table ready.)
Me: *pointing to that table* “Ten points to Gryffindor for being ready!”
Kids: “Yay!”
Me: “You know the points mean nothing, right?”
Kids: “Who cares? We have 10 of them!”
(I am playing with some of the kindergartners I teach when one comes over to give me a drawing.)
Me: “Thank you! I’ll put it on my wall when I get home!”
Other Kid: “You have a HOME!?”
(I have to walk off since I am laughing too hard to speak.)
(I am student-teaching at a local elementary school. While supervising recess one day, a second-grade boy approaches him.)
Me: “Hey! What’s up?”
Kid: “How many kids would it take to lift you onto the merry-go-round, tie you down, and spin you until your brain exploded?”
Me: “Uh… I don’t know. Why?”
Kid: *ponders for a second* “It would probably take 10,000 of us.”
(The kid trots away contentedly, leaving me to wonder what is going on in his head.)
