Unfiltered Story #141279

, , | Unfiltered | February 21, 2019

(This has actually happened to me a couple of times, because of my accent, some people mistake me for being American, which isn’t a bad thing when you listen to the accent of my hometown, one day there was a gentleman who came into the store buying a Chromecast)

Customer: So how are you enjoying Northern Ireland?

Me: Pardon?

Customer: It must be interesting for someone from America to visit Londonderry

Me: Um, I’m not really American sir

Customer: Are you not? Where are you from then, Canada? Canada is a lovely place isn’t it?

Me: Oh I’m not from Canada either sir

Customer: Really? Where are you from?

Me: Londonderry

Customer: Oh…really? Did you move here?

Me: No, born and raised in Londonderry

Customer: Oh

Me: Have a nice day

(Customer leaves the store)

Manager: You know you should just say your from America just for fun

Me: Nah

The Self-Appointed Cable Guy

, , , | Right | February 18, 2019

(I am standing at the counter at work when a man approaches with a cable in his hand, an Apple-branded Thunderbolt cable. I scan the barcode, and read him the price from the screen.)

Me: “That’ll be £29, please, sir.”

Customer: “Yeah, I know it says that, but just so you know, that must be a typo.”

(I’m a little confused.)

Me: “Well, it comes up at that price on the till, so looks like it must be a good reduction right now.”

Customer: “Well, it’s £49.99 everywhere else, so your price is obviously wrong.”

Me: “Well, it just means we’re cheaper than everywhere else at the moment, sir.”

Customer: “I doubt that very much. You should pass this information on to your head office. Apple doesn’t let companies discount their cables this much.”

(I decided he obviously just wanted to be right, although he wasn’t. Deciding not to get involved in that part of the conversation, he left, telling me I’d better feed it back to someone. Turns out he was a former company director, who liked to feel like he still knew how the company he hadn’t worked at for years operated. I almost feel like I should have, after he continued to mention the higher price elsewhere, tell him I’d be happy to give him it at that price if it would make him feel better.)

Unfiltered Story #140397

, , | Unfiltered | February 16, 2019

(I work in an electronics store which is located inside a mall. there are signs on the mall’s exterior wall for the stores that are inside. The sign for our store, and for a sports store two stores down from us, are next to each other. A man comes into our store and looks around confused)

Customer: It’s *sports store* in here?

Me: Yes.

Customer: (looking further inside our store) Where? I don’t see it anywhere.

Me: Um, it’s two stores down.

Customer: What?

Me: It’s two stores down. It’s just past the hair place.

Customer: What?

Me: (pointing to the hall) it’s two stores down.

Customer: Oh I thought it was in here! You should change your sign outside! It looks like *sports store* is inside this store!

(After he leaves, a coworker comes up)

Corworker: He couldn’t just walk 20 feet down the hall, he had to come into the first store asking where it was?

Me: No, he thought it was IN OUR store

A Dustbuster Is Required For Her Head

, , , , | Right | February 11, 2019

(A middle-aged customer has been standing with her mouth open in the middle of the store, staring off into space, for a little while now, about two minutes. Since I’ve finished the job I was doing for the moment. I go and ask her what would she like help with. I already know this is going to be a mistake.)

Me: “Morning. Need any help with anything?”

Customer: “Dustbuster.”

(She has a peculiar way of speaking.)

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “Dustbuster.”

Me: “You want a Dustbuster?”

(I heard it this time, but I’m wracking my brains to try and remember what a Dustbuster is. Is it a new duster?)

Customer: “Yes, where are your Dustbusters?”

Me: “Sorry, I’m drawing a blank here; what is a Dustbuster?”

Customer: “You know, it’s a Dustbuster!”

Me: *sighs internally* “I don’t know; that’s why I’m asking.”

(I’m not losing my patience, but it’s the beginning of the day and I’m barely awake.)

Customer: “You know.” *turns 180 degrees and points straight away* “That’s a Dustbuster.”

(She points in amongst our section of vacuum cleaners to a specific model; it’s a small, handheld one that is impossible to see where we are standing. So, did she find it beforehand and wait for someone to help her so she could test them? Why didn’t she just say it was a vacuum cleaner? Nobody knows! The next time I walk by, she grabs my attention for help. I keep a smile on my face.)

Me: “Hello again. Need anything?”

Customer: “Does this come with a charger?”

Me: “I’d expect so; we don’t sell them separately.”

(I take the box and start looking over it to check, just to be sure.)

Customer: “Well, does it or not?”

Me: “I’m just checking the box to be sure.”

Customer: “Well, does it?”

Me: “Yep.”

(I find it pretty quickly, no thanks to her demanding. There’s a big picture on the side saying as much. I wish more customers would actually use their eyes and brain before getting Mummy to read for them like children.)

Me: “See? It’s got a charging stand included.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. So, I don’t need to buy it separately, then?”

Me: “Nope, not at all.”

Customer: “So, why did you say I did?”

Me: “I said, we don’t sell them separately.”

Customer: “So, why would you say I needed to buy it if you don’t sell it?”

(Every retail assistant has had the moment where they pause, and have to think about the best way to say something — something that covers all the bases and answers all the questions so we can move on.)

Me: “No, I said we don’t sell them if you needed it, but since it’s already included in the box, you don’t need to buy one from us, since it’s already in the box.”

Customer: “Okay. So, does it come with any attachments?”

Me: *points to the next picture down* “Yep, it comes with a window cleaning attachment, too, as well as replacement nozzles.”

Customer: “And how powerful is it?”

Me: *points to the next picture down, showing her specifically that if she has a question, she should probably read these pictures first* “It says here 800w.”

Customer: “Ah, right, I see.” *praise Mary* “So, does it take bags?”

Me: *points to the next d***ed picture* “Nope, it’s got its own filter so you can just empty that out.”

Customer: “Okay, I want to see it.”

(I open it up and show her, and she prods it a few times, as customers are wont to do, while I explain its mechanisms and how it works. I’ve never seen the d*** thing before in my life, and as a customer assistant you get very good at improv and how things work.)

Customer: “I’ll think about it. Goodbye.”

(This roughly means, “I’m off to buy it from somewhere else; they’re cheaper but they’re not as helpful as you! Bye bye, suckers!” I spend the next five minutes wondering how to get the d*** thing back in the box; it’s already been twenty minutes at this stage.)

Manager: “Why haven’t you done [thing] yet?”

Me: “There was an annoying customer.”

(My manager sympathised and completely understood.)

Unfiltered Story #139414

, , | Unfiltered | February 9, 2019

Me: Do you have air miles?

Customer: No. (turns to man behind her) Do you have air miles?

Man: No

Customer: You don’t want to get points?

Man: um, no, I don’t have air miles.

Customer: (to me) Weird. He doesn’t want to use his air miles.

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