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An Instruction Deconstruction

, | Las Vegas, NV, USA | Popular, Technology

(I answer a customer call.)

Customer: “I bought a VCR from you and I followed the cable provider instructions for hookup but I can’t get it to work.”

(I explains the correct hookup step by step.)

Customer: “But that isn’t how the cable provider instructions said.”

Me: “You followed the cable provider instructions and it doesn’t work?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Would you like to follow my instructions so that it does work?”

Customer: “Uh, okay…”

Customer Ignorance Is Soda Pressing

, | Payson, UT, USA | Technology

(I overhear this between an employee and a customer.)

Customer: “So, what is so great about this smartphone?”

Employee: “Well, it’s waterproof and—”

Customer: “Waterproof? There is no such thing!”

Employee: “I can assure you—”

Customer: “Prove it.”

(As I listen to this, the employee proceeds to dip it in the guy’s soda.)

Employee: “See, it works.” *proceeds to pull it back out and show that it works*

Customer: “Well, umm… the customer is always right!”

Just Type In ‘Born Yesterday’

, | Lansing, MI, USA | At The Checkout, Technology

(Whenever we access a customer’s account, they need to give us their pin number.)

Me: “All right, now, what’s your eight-digit pin number?”

Customer: “I don’t know… Oh! It’s my birthday!”

Me: *looking at them expectantly*

Customer: *looking at me expectantly*

Me: “aaannndddd what would that be?”