This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 17

| Reston, VA, USA | At The Checkout, Money, Technology

Customer: “Excuse me, I’d like to get a refund for an item I purchased from your online store.”

Me: “Sure, I can help with that. Just let me see the item so I can pull it up in our system.”

Customer: “Well, the item hasn’t arrived yet. It’s still being delivered.”

Me: “Oh, we won’t be able to issue a refund unless you actually give us something to refund. When the item arrives, bring it back here and we can give you your money back, no problem!”

Customer: “I can’t believe you won’t give me a freaking refund! This is unacceptable! I bought the item, and you d*** well better give me my money back!”

Me: “Sir, I understand that you’d like to get your money refunded. Without giving us your item back, it’s like we’re just giving it to you. We can’t give you the money today, only to have you return here a few days later to give us the item back!”

Customer: “Well, why would I need to return here? I would have already gotten my money back by then!”

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 16
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 15
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 14
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 13
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 12

Refund Isn’t In The (Memory) Cards

| FL, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology, Top

(A customer comes in trying to return a camera with no receipt. After I tell her I will not be doing the refund, she demands a manager.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “Your store ruined my daughter’s graduation! This camera that your employees sold me wouldn’t work! I couldn’t take any pictures!”

Manager: “I’m sorry, but without a receipt we can’t refund this.”

Customer: “You are going to refund this! And the memory card too!”

Me: “Okay, tell you what: why don’t I just try to fix your camera for you? Then we’ll go from there.”

(The customer scoffs and shoves her camera at me.)

Customer: “Yeah, sure, go ahead and try. I’m telling you, you sold me a defective camera.”

(I turn the camera on. It works fine. I try to take a picture; it says it doesn’t have enough memory. I open the battery compartment to inspect the card and immediately see the problem.)

Me: “This isn’t a memory card.”

Customer: “Excuse me?! Your employees picked this card and sold it to me!”

Me: “This is an adapter, which is fine. The memory card needs to be inside of the adapter as well. Do you have something that looks like it would fit in this?”

Customer: “Oh, that little thing? I threw that away.”

(She grabs her camera and slinks away.)

Not Dropping The Charges

| Montreal, QC, Canada | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers

(A customer comes in to return a totally shattered phone.)

Customer: “It’s really cold outside and I was using it and pop!”

Me: “This looks like it was dropped.”

Customer: “I didn’t drop it; it just cracked!”

Me: “That’s not possible.”

Customer: “I want to see your manager.”

Me: “That won’t be necessary.”

Customer: “Excuse me?”

Me: “That won’t be necessary. Just like me, he is not going to want his intelligence questioned by someone who claims he just saw the laws of physics being broken, at the hands of an irresponsible user.”

Customer: “…fine. I might have dropped it on the ice.”

Me: “Now we’re getting somewhere.”