A Gas-Giant Sized A**hole

, , , , | Right | January 5, 2019

(I’m a customer at a restaurant and bar that holds trivia every Sunday night. In the middle of the game, there is a question about the solar system. The correct answer is, “Jupiter.” A family with two young kids enters the restaurant as this question is displayed on the TVs but the teams still have time to put in their answers.)

Kid: *yelling loudly enough to be heard over the music* “JUPITER! IT’S JUPITER! THE ANSWER IS JUPITER!”

DJ: “And the correct answer is… Jupiter! And everyone got that right. So, just a reminder: there’s no blurting out answers if you’re not playing the game.”

Dad: “Oh! Angry DJ, huh? We’ve got an angry DJ!” *looks around the restaurant for backup but no one says anything* “Hey, buddy, the customer is always right!”

Me: “Dude, you’re not a trivia customer.”

(The family angrily left the restaurant. They later called the manager and demanded that the DJ apologize. She told them that wasn’t going to happen.)

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Easy To Counter This Counter Case

, , , , , , | Right | April 18, 2018

(I come into work to find this email from a customer:)

Email: “I left my iPad in a blue case at your store. I WANT IT BACK. I brought it in to see if you could help with it and forgot it on the counter. Why wouldn’t you have called to tell me I left it there? Or texted me. Now I have to wait in agony until 7:30 so I can call you. Call me earlier if you can. It better still be there!”

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Do You Have The Balls To Take My Test?

, , , , , , , | Learning | November 10, 2017

(Our accounting professor gave out weekly quizzes which he called “quizzees.”)

Student: *after the first “quizzee”* “If these are your quizzees, I don’t want to see your testees.”

(Cue laughter and embarrassment.)

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