A Pharmalogical Liar

| AL, USA | Right | October 6, 2016

(I am checking out a customer. She then hands me a check made out to another pharmacy along with their loyalty card.)

Me: “Ma’am, this is [Drug Store].”

(Normally, people apologize and laugh and fix their check. This customer is altogether another story.)

Customer: “No, it’s not!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, this is [Drug Store], not [Pharmacy]. I just need you to change that on your check.”

Customer: “No, it’s not! I never shop at [Drug Store]! I hate them! Stop lying!”

Me: “Ma’am, I promise I know where I work.” *I point to my nametag and uniform with the name of my drug store on it*

Customer: “No, I hate [Drug Store]. I never shop there!” *she wags her finger in my face*

Me: “Well, you shopped here tonight!”

(She actually walks outside the door to read the sign outside before she believes me. The customer in line behind her is laughing as she leaves.)

Next Customer: “Little did you know the wrong company had been sending you paychecks all along!”

It’s The Funniest Thing

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Right | September 23, 2016

(I work at a popular drug store chain in Canada. We sell pretty much everything and I work in the cosmetics/skincare department. It’s rare that I get really ridiculous requests but this one was so memorable.)

Customer: “I need that thing that you put on your face. You know what I’m talking about.”

Me: “Sorry, I’m not sure what you’re talking about. Foundation, moisturizer…?”

Customer: “You know! You put it on the thing and then put it on your face!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m going to need you to be more specific. What does the product look like?”

(10 minutes later we’ve finally decided she was looking for moisturizer.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with, ma’am?”

Customer: “Yes, I need that make-up thing, you know…”

A Suction Reduction

| Fond du Lac, WI, USA | Right | August 31, 2016

(I am a 17-year-old girl. I’ve only been working here for a few weeks, so I’m still not sure about everything we stock and where every item is. A couple in their thirties comes up to me, looking a bit nervous.)

Man: “Do you… uh, have any little suction balls?”

Me: “Um, suction balls?”

Man: “Yeah, you know…” *he mines squeezing something like a turkey baster*

Me: “Oh! I think I know what you mean. We have suction things for cleaning babies’ noses. Is that what you want?”

(The couple exchange looks and start to giggle.)

Wife: “Well, that’s not what we’re going to use it for…”

(I turn around quickly before they can see how red my face has become. I show them what they are looking for, and after they leave I relay the story to my manager.)

Manager: “Yeah, if you’re going to work here during the evening shift you’re going to have to stop asking questions.”

Full Time Care(less)

| Omaha, NE, USA | Related | July 30, 2016

(The following is what I overhear after I let a customer use the store phone.)

Customer: “Come on, pick up the phone! You’re in a d*** wheelchair, I know you’re there! I left you upstairs for a reason!”

They’re About To Crack(er)

| Dartmouth, NS, Canada | Friendly | July 19, 2016

(While picking up some snacks at a local drugstore on my way to work, I overhear this interaction between two other customers, one male and one female.)

Male: *rudely* “I told you, it’s not there!” *goes over to another aisle and demands* “Goldfish crackers!”

Female: *already holding other items* “We’re going to need a cart.”

Male: “I TOLD you to get one when we came in here!” *storms off to get a cart, continuing to berate the female* “It’s because you got so much stuff!”

(The kicker? When I turned the aisle I realised it wasn’t a couple. It was an incredibly patient mother and her son, aged maybe ten years old!)

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