I transferred my driver’s license from my home state to my new state. In doing so, I was required to retake my driver’s test. I was a little annoyed but went along with it. Before the test started, I was chatting with my instructor. He showed me the route we would be taking and walked me through where each skill would be tested.

Instructor: “So, what do you think will be the hardest part of this exam for you?”

Me: “Well, I’m not great at parallel parking. It just isn’t really a thing when you live in the middle of nowhere.”

Instructor: “Okay, that’s fair.”

Me: “And I hate roundabouts. I know they’re supposed to be easier than a regular intersection, but I’ve never been able to use one without someone cutting me off to get in.”

Instructor: “Really? But it’s so simple. You just wait your turn.”

Me: “Yeah, I know, but apparently, I attract people who don’t want to wait.”

Instructor: “Well, that won’t happen today. This roundabout isn’t used very much, so you shouldn’t have a huge problem.”

We went on our test (I parallel parked with minimal issues!) and got to the roundabout. I waited my turn, merged in, and immediately hit my brakes. The car entering from the next merge lane decided to roll right through the yield sign and cut me off. I got off at my turn and pulled over.

Me: “So…”

Instructor: “Well. You didn’t hit anyone. You used your signals, maintained a safe speed, parallel parked with ease… and you didn’t honk or scream when that person cut you off.”

Me: “So… I passed?”

Instructor: “Yes. And also, please stay away from roundabouts.”

I’ve finally turned fifteen, and it’s my turn to learn how to drive! The high school has its own cars for us to learn in. We call them “Tupperware on wheels” because, well, they’re big and bulky, and drive like boats. Perfect for us young’uns to learn the rules of the road.

I’m driving. The teacher is beside me, and another student is behind me; we’ll stop at some point, and we’ll switch.

I execute a perfect left turn from the school grounds onto the main street, and I’m feeling pretty confident.

Until I go the speed limit.

It’s 35mph where we are (about 56kph). Once I get comfortable in the lane, I maintain that speed. It’s a straight line for about a mile, with a suicide lane in the middle for people who want to turn left, and then oncoming traffic. No lights.

A woman decides it’s the perfect time to sit on our bumper. In fact, she honks a couple of times because we’re clearly not going as fast as she wants.

Please note that this car is covered in decals stating the name of the school and that this car is specifically for driver’s education.

The teacher starts getting frustrated at her and occasionally glances back. He then tells me to speed up a little. I comply.

The woman continues to honk and stay on our rear. The teacher, again, tells me to speed up a little more. I comply.

I’m finally going about 45mph (about 72kph) when the woman kicks out of the lane and speeds around us into the suicide lane – to pass us. The teacher excuses himself to me, leans over, and firmly places his hand on our own horn.

We finally make it to the end of the street, where there is a light. The woman has now gotten in front of us and is going to turn right.

Our teacher swears loudly because he had wanted to be next to her, to give her a piece of his mind.

That was but one memorable piece of high school memories, but I will never forget the teacher telling me that:

I did fine.

I did exactly as instructed.

In fact, I probably should have hit the brakes, as that would have caused damage to both cars and would have made that woman look really, really stupid.

Related:
Driving Miss Crazy, Part 4
Driving Miss Crazy, Part 3
Driving Miss Crazy, Part 2
Driving Miss Crazy

This was about ten years ago, when I was getting my driver’s license. I already passed the theoretical (written) test and have finalized an appointment with my driving instructor and the examiner for my actual driving exam, and paid for it up front. I have been repeatedly told that if I cancel the appointment less than twenty-four hours in advance, I will not get a refund on my examination fee – several hundred Euros!

The day before my driving exam, I came into work (retail) and saw that the schedule had been changed so that, despite requesting the next day off, I am suddenly scheduled to work the day of my exam, while my boss (the store manager) has taken the day off herself. I immediately seek her out. 

Note that I’m still in vocational training and quite young. My boss is only a few years older than I am, so she sometimes feels like she needs to go on a bit of a power trip to remind everyone of the hierarchy at work.

Me: “Boss, I’m sorry, but the new schedule doesn’t work for me. I requested tomorrow off for my driving exam, and it was approved weeks ago.”

Boss: “Well, I wasn’t told. You need to let me know these things in advance. I have plans with my boyfriend tomorrow that I can’t cancel.”

Me: “I can’t cancel my exam on such short notice either. I’ll be out several hundred bucks if I do!”

Boss: “Well, you can’t go. Figure something out.”

Me: “But the only excuse for me to cancel at this point would be with a doctor’s note.”

Boss: “See? It’s that simple. Get one of those, and then you can come into work.”

Me: “Um… I’m not sure that’s even legal. I won’t be insured if I come into work when I have a doctor’s note.”

Boss: “It’s not like anything ever happens here; you’ll be fine.”

I decide to drop it and do, in fact, get up super early the next morning so I can just walk into my doctor’s office before all the appointments start. I explain to him exactly what is going on and that I’m not actually sick, but my boss is making me do this so I won’t lose the bigger part of my trainee wage (which is FAR below minimum wage, I might add).

Doctor: “Okay, I get where you’re coming from. And while I don’t approve of the method, you’re in a real s***ty situation due to no fault of your own, so I will make an exception this one time. Here’s your doctor’s note for today, so you don’t lose money on that driving test your boss doesn’t want you to take. But I also don’t want you to go into work, got it? If your boss gives you s*** about it, tell her to call me, or you can call your HR and tell them to call me. I’ve got you covered.”

So, I call into work (and the driving exam) sick and spend the entire day quietly panicking about my boss’ reaction. 

When I get back to work the next day, she is seething, but subdued. Turns out she had to cancel her plans with her boyfriend and cover for me. But she can’t fault me or write me up for it because then she’d have to explain herself to HR, and that would get HER into trouble more than me – HR really doesn’t like hearing that a store manager forces people to come into work despite having a doctor’s notice, I’m told.

My boss never talked to me about it again, and the next time I requested a day off for my new driving exam appointment, it was quietly approved, and no changes to the schedule happened the entire week.

CORRECTION: A swear word has been censored.

I’m learning how to drive. I’ve just gotten comfortable and am driving, holding the steering wheel with my fingertips.

Instructor: “You shouldn’t do that.”

Me: “Is it on the list of reasons why you can fail me?”

Instructor: “No, but… what if your passenger reaches over and grabs the wheel like this?!”

He does just that, grabbing the wheel and giving it a yank.

Me: “Uh, if my passenger does that, they’re about to stop being my passenger. Ever again.”

I come home from high school with the paperwork for my school’s driver’s ed course.

Me: “Mom, this needs parental consent.”

Mom: “No.”

Me: “Why?”

Mom: “I don’t want you stealing my car.”

Me: “I don’t need a driver’s license to steal your car.”

Mom: *Laughs.* “…Not helping your case, future car thief.”

She did sign it after I explained that my driving means that I can drive her to her weekly mahjong nights and she can have a beer, finally.