Fire Past The Firing Customers

, , , , | Right | October 2, 2017

(I’m a cashier working in the drive thru of a fast food restaurant, and an older customer comes up and complains to me.)

Me: “Your total is $5.14.”

Customer: “EXCUSE ME, BUT YOU ALL TAKE SO D*** LONG TO TAKE MY ORDER!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; it’s a very busy day, but—”

Customer: “I’m going to tell your supervisors to fire all of you; I already got everyone fired at [other Fast Food Chain] and I can get you fired!”

Me: “Thank you, and have a nice day.” *closes window*

(The next car came in and asked me to spit in her coffee, which made it better.)

Dollars To Donuts: You’re Awesome

, , , , | Hopeless | September 28, 2017

(We have a late day at work, so I decide to go in early and splurge at a well-known donut establishment for breakfast. I pull into the drive-thru and everything goes well, until I get to the window. Note: I spoke with a woman at the drive-thru; there’s a gent at the window, who is, I assume, some kind of manager.)

Employee: “Miss! I’m very sorry, but we’re out of the breaded chicken until tomorrow. We have the same thing with ham or turkey.”

Me: “Oh, lame. Okay. Turkey?”

Employee: “Right. Do you want that with ranch or rancho-mayo?”

Me: “Um.”

Employee: “Rancho is basically just spicy.”

Me: “Yeah, sure; let’s go with that.”

Employee: “Okay, great. And here. Let me buy you a donut.”

Me: “Wait; what?”

Employee: “It’s no problem, miss! I hate being out of things. What kind do you like?”

Me: “Dude! Um. I dunno; pick something?” *I’m trying not to laugh as this guy is practically doing flips for me!*

Employee: “Well, we’re kind of known for donuts. I mean, we’ve got a bunch. How about… vanilla or chocolate?”

Me: *actually laughing now* “Chocolate!”

Employee: “There we go!” *leaves for a second, comes back* “Here: chocolate sprinkles. I’ll get the coffee and the sandwich.”

Me: “That wasn’t necessary!”

Employee: “Don’t worry about it! Here’s the coffee. And… here’s the sandwich! You have a great weekend!”

Me: “You, too! Thanks so much!”

(I really wanted to tell him he was wearing an awesome hat, the bright neon colors of the company, but as they were running around I didn’t want to bother them. Thanks so much, dude! The donut made an amazing snack! It wasn’t necessary, but it made my day so much better.)

Having Some Coffee With Their Baked Goods

, , , , | Right | September 27, 2017

(Please note that this is a small, two-sided, two-windowed coffee shop. We currently have two customers, one at each window.)

Customer: *speaking slowly* “Wow. Y’all are really busy. Man. Can’t believe you’re so busy right now.”

Manager: *laughs* “Yeah, we’re totally slammed.”

Customer: “Y’all gots a lot of cars here for a tiny place.”

(At this point, we realize the woman is serious.)

Manager: “Uh…yeah. We’re actually really slow right now. Have a nice day, bye!”

Customer: “What?” *muttering* “There’s just so many people…”

Manager: *closes window* “I haven’t seen anybody that baked since I was in high school. Wow.”

(It took the woman three minutes to pull out of the driveway and onto the completely empty street. I hope she made it home okay.)

Out Of The Frying Pan And Into Getting Fired

, , , , | Working | September 27, 2017

(We’re in a waiting bay at a popular fast food restaurant. I see a worker carrying our food over. I notice that she is walking rather slowly, and then I see her open the bag and pinch a few fries. I lower my window as she arrives.)

Worker: “662?”

Me: “Yes.” *as she hands the bag over* “Could we perhaps have an order you haven’t already eaten from, thank you?”

Worker: *going red in the face* “Oh, umm, sure. I didn’t know you were watching.”

(She walks back and starts eating again, in full view of the restaurant. She comes back five minutes later, holding the bag at arms length.)

Partner: *as we’re leaving the car park* “Let’s never come here again.”

Me: “Deal.”

(We never did.)

You’re Not Motivating Us To Help You Faster

, , , , | Right | September 21, 2017

(A car drives straight through our drive-thru without stopping at the order box. Keep in mind that we are timed for how fast we get cars through at the window. Once the customer is at the window:)

Customer: “Give me a small black, a turkey club, and two fruit explosion muffins.”

Me: “Certainly. But sir, I will ask that you please place your order at the order box on your future visits. It helps us ensure that you are not waiting in the drive-thru very long, and that we are able to get you through quicker.”

Customer: “That’s okay; I find this way helps you move faster.”

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