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Stuck In A Vicious Bicycle

| VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Popular

(We work in a single-story building. Our store is a little smaller than others of the same chain in the area. I am rearranging the lawnmowers when a woman approaches me.)

Woman: “Excuse me; I can’t seem to find the bicycles.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t carry bicycles in this store. We have a bicycle section with some small things, but you have to go to [Other Location] for actual bikes.”

Woman: “No, your BICYCLES. I need a bicycle.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we don’t carry them.”

Woman: “YES, you DO!”

Me: “Our other stores do. Our store is too small.”

Woman: “I saw them YESTERDAY. Ugh.”

Me: “Really? Where?”

Woman: “I don’t remember.”

Me: “Maybe you were at [Other Location]?”

Woman: “You’re not LISTENING. Just show me the bicycle section.”

(I lead her to the bicycle section where we have a few spare tires, pumps, etc.)

Woman: No, where your BICYCLES ARE.

Me: *frustrated* “OHHH, our BICYCLES! Sorry, I didn’t understand. You are looking for our bicycles, but not at [Other Location]?”

Woman: “YES, FINALLY!”

Me: “The bicycles are upstairs!”

Woman: “WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY SO THE FIRST TIME!?”

(She stormed off. I alerted the rest of our team about the crazy lady and fess up to sending her to our nonexistent upstairs. I got scolded later. Worth it.)

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The Virtues Of Customer Service

| Canada | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Popular, Religion

(I work as a cashier and I have a very new cashier on the till next to mine so I can help her if she has any questions. The new cashier turns to ask me a quick question about a transaction while I am serving an elderly man.)

Me: *to customer* “I’m sorry, sir, please give me just one second.”

(The question is simple and I do not even have to leave my till to deal with the problem. The entire exchange takes maybe a minute at most.)

Customer: *very rudely* “Excuse ME, but I believe you were serving me first.”

Me: “Sorry about that, sir. This is [Coworker]’s first time on cash alone and I am to make sure that I help her if she gets stuck.”

Customer: “Well, that isn’t my problem.”

(I politely ignore his rude tone and finish scanning his last couple items. In his order is a large number of cleaning supplies.)

Customer: “I am getting ready for a full weekend of spring cleaning. Cleanliness is next to godliness, you know!”

Me: *smiling and handing him his shopping bag* “Yes, and so is patience, so I hear.”

Doesn’t Understand Your Conversion Metric

| Home Improvement, Math & Science

(Our store usually prints dimensions on the packaging in centimetres and so the staff are used to older customers having trouble converting to inches. A customer approaches myself and another staff member.)

Customer: “Excuse me, could you help me work out this curtain size?”

Me: “Sure, what do you need?”

Customer: “Well, I need a length 2.28 metres but this one says 228 centimetres. How do I convert that?”

Returner Burner

, | USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Popular

(A customer walks up with some essential oils.)

Customer: “I have to return this; it’s been tampered with. You shouldn’t put this back on the shelf.”

Me: “Okay, would you like to just return it or would you like to exchange it?”

Customer: “I would like to exchange it.”

Me: “No problem! Just grab what you need and I’ll swap them for you!”

Customer: “NO. You need to grab it for me! I’ve had a very long day and I’m too tired for this!”

Me: “…Uh.”

(I remember that my coworker is behind the wall that we sort our returns, so I could leave to go grab it but if she wasn’t there then I wouldn’t have been able to.)

Me: “Sure…” *to coworker* “Hey [Coworker], I have to go grab something for a customer. I’ll be back in a second.”

(I run to go grab it and I’m quite perplexed by his attitude with me. Fortunately, one of my coworkers in that department helps me find it so I get back right away. I process his exchange.)

Customer: “Now, you better not put that one back on the shelf!”

Me: “Yep, and I double-checked to make sure that one wasn’t tampered with for you.”

Customer: “Thank you!” *leaves*

(One of my coworkers comes up to me.)

Coworker: “You should have just pretended like I wasn’t there. That’s what I would have done.”

Me: “I guess; I just didn’t want to make it more troublesome than he was making it out to be.”

Coworker: “I would have made it so awful for them. When people treat me like that, I purposely will make sure that the return will take much longer than it usually does. Such as, restarting the transaction over a few times.”

Me: “…I think, I’d rather just get them out of here as fast as possible so I don’t have to deal with them any longer.”

Coworker: “I’d rather stare them down and make them uncomfortable. I even do an overly happy/obnoxious voice just to make them mad.”

No Dress Is Worth This Price

| High Wycombe, England, UK | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(It’s a few weeks until Christmas. I work for a small concession on the women’s clothing floor in an upmarket department store. A man holding a very large, rather hideous, full-length formal gown stops me.)

Customer: “I don’t know my partner’s size, so if it’s the wrong size, or she doesn’t like it, what can she do? But I don’t want her to know how much I spent.”

Me: “Okay, you can get a gift receipt when you purchase the dress. That way she won’t know how much the dress costs, and she can exchange the dress by herself.”

Customer: “But what if it’s a different price?”

Me: “Either the difference will have to be paid, or she will get a gift card with the rest of the money. Unfortunately, with a gift receipt; we can’t pay cash or put it on a card unless it’s the same card.”

Customer: “But then she will know how much the dress cost…”

Me: “She won’t know the exact price if you have a gift receipt, but if she needs another size, she will probably see the price tag.”

Customer: “But how do I stop her finding out what the price is?”

Me: “If she needs to change it, you could go with her?”

Customer: “But I don’t want to do that. I just don’t want her to find out the price.”

Me: “That’s what the gift receipt is for.”

Customer: “But if she changes it, and it’s a different price, she’ll know?”

(This went on for a while.)

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