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Not Going To Workout

| MA, USA | Technology

(This takes place by the movie racks in Electronics.)

Customer: “Do you have any workout DVDs?”

Coworker: “They’re over in Sporting Goods.”

Customer: “Oh, that’s too far.”

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A Very Large Closing Sign

| NJ, USA | Bizarre, Popular

(At our department store, we have overhead announcements at half-hour, fifteen, ten and five minutes before the store is closing, alerting customers to please bring all final purchases to the registers, etc. We also usually have one of the team leads up by the front doors to let people know we’ll be closing soon and to please come back if it’s not a small, urgent purchase. The TL on the job this night is about 6’5″ and around 300 pounds, and this apparently happens at least three times a night whenever he’s given the duty.)

Team Lead: “Sorry, folks, we’re going to be closing soon.”

(He says this with a cheerful smile and a general gesture towards the exit doors; the would-be-customers end up looking TERRIFIED, and bolt out!)

Me: “[Team Lead], you’re not scary looking! Why do they freak out?”

Team Lead: “Apparently they’re not used to having someone that is too big to ignore tell them things!”

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Why You Need Hazard Pay: Reason Number Two

| Buffalo, NY, USA | Bizarre, Popular

(I work as a general janitor in a department store. I’m near the upstairs bathrooms, which are usually pretty quiet.)

Woman: “Excuse me! Can I throw something in your trash bin?”

Me: “Of course!”

Woman: *pulls out of her purse, no baby in sight, a full diaper* “Thanks!”

(She dumped the diaper and walked away. I have SO many questions…)

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