(I’m in my twenties and hate dentists after seeing a very bad orthodontist in my teens. My mother insists that I go to a practice that her friend has recommended, and we get appointments at the same time. We fill out our information in the waiting room, and a nurse comes in to check it.)

Nurse: “So, do either of you have any fears or problems with dentists?”

Me: *hand raises instantly* “Yep! It’s not really a fear but the smell and the noise of the drill make me feel sick…”

Nurse: “Okay. We get a lot of people who don’t like the drill, but it’ll be fine…”

(I go into the dentist, who is excellent and explains everything. I tell her why I haven’t been in so long and she’s very understanding. She writes down everything that I need done in subsequent visits, and I go back again for a filling a few weeks later. She lets me listen to music so I can’t hear the drill and get it done as quickly as possible. I go out to reception to pay and wait for my mum.)

Receptionist: *not looking up* “All right, it’s [price] for today, and we can take you on [date] for the root canal.”

Me: “What?”

Receptionist: *looks at me* “Oh, it says on your chart that you need one.”

Me: *feeling sick* “I wasn’t told. I was just given this list…”

Receptionist: *sees me turn white* “Oh. Uh, I’ll just get the dentist…”

(The dentist brought me back in and apologised. It turned out that one tooth was too damaged for a filling, but she was sparing me the horror after coping so well with the two I’d just gotten. She explained that root canals aren’t as bad as I had been told, but I could have the tooth removed instead when I went to get my wisdom teeth removed under general anaesthetic. I chose the removal, and haven’t been back in case the receptionist springs any other surprises on me…)

(I have a very severe jaw infection. It has spread from my lower jaw to my upper jaw and down my throat. I can’t eat or sleep and I’ve scheduled an appointment with my dentist for over a week from now. A few days later, it’s become an emergency, so I call again.)

Receptionist: “How can I help you?”

Me: “Hi. This is [My Name] again. I have an appointment scheduled for next Wednesday, but it’s become an emergency. Do you have emergency openings or a cancellation or some way I can get in today?”

Receptionist: “We’ll call you back after we look at the schedule.” *click*

(Two hours go by. My pain has intensified and I’m crying from it. I decide to call again.)

Me: “Hi, it’s [My Name] again. You said you’d call back and no one ever did. I can’t swallow at this point and it’s getting dangerous. Are you going to be able to get me in today or not?”

Receptionist: “The doctor isn’t even in today. And the hygienist says she won’t prescribe you any pain medication because she thinks you’re just looking for drugs. Anyway, you have an appointment scheduled for next week. You’re not our top priority. Just wait until then.”

Me: “You do know that a jaw infection can reach the brain and cause damage? And you know that it can cause blood poisoning, right?”

Receptionist: “Well, we’re not going out of our way for you when you already have a scheduled appointment.” *click*

(In a panic, I find another dentist office and walk in. I ask to see the dentist. They get me an x-ray, do an oral exam, get me a prescription for pain medication, and an appointment with an oral surgeon to remove the problem tooth. They said the infection was so bad, had it reached my blood stream, I could have died. They even go out of their way to make sure any medication I take is safe for breastfeeding my infant. About an hour after this appointment, I am happily on pain killers and the first dentist office calls back.)

Receptionist: “Hi. We had a cancellation and can get you in on Monday. That’s the best we can do.”

Me: “Just cancel my appointment. And all further appointments. I found a dentist that cares. They took better care of me than the office I’ve been going to for 20 years and potentially saved my life. While you’re cancelling those appointments, go ahead and transfer all of my records. We’re done here.” *click*

(I am at my dentist of 10 years having a crown put in. Since the dentist is quite far from home my sister drives me and sits in the waiting room whilst I’m having my crown put in. This conversation happens with the dentist’s assistant.)

Assistant: “So, is that your girlfriend outside waiting for you?”

Me: “No, that’s my sister…”

Assistant: “Oh… you look good together. You should date!”

(Neither of us could make eye contact with the assistant after that.)

(I am sitting in front of my computer trying to get on with work whilst my colleague is dealing with a patient. Another patient approaches the desk.)

Me: “Hi there! How can I help today?”

Patient: “You know, you really should grow taller. I could hardly see you over the desk.”

(I go on to sign the patient in, and continue with my work. 10 minutes later, the patient comes back to the desk.)

Patient: “You know, you’re still no taller; you really need to grow.”

(I take the patient’s money, and she leaves.)

Me: *to my colleague* “Did I just get told off for not growing any taller in the space of 10 minutes?”

Colleague: “Erm, yes, I think you did.”

(My boss has informed me that his best friend has unexpectedly died, and that he will need to cancel his appointments for the next two days. I’m currently on the phone to a patient who is notorious for being difficult.)

Me: “Hello, this is [me] calling on behalf of [Dentist]. I’m calling to inform you that due to unfortunate circumstances, [Dentist] will have to cancel your appointment for Friday. I do apologize for the inconvenience, but would you like to take the time to reschedule?”

Patient: “Seriously? This is unacceptable. I’ve already cleared my schedule just so that I can be there. What is so d*** important that he can just cancel my appointment?”

Me: “Well, sir, [Dentist] will be taking time off to attend a funeral out of state. Again, I apologize for the inconvenience. I do have an opening two weeks from today. Would that work?”

Patient: “No, no, I’ve already agreed to meet with my clients all that week. See, my time is actually worth something; I can’t just cancel on my client’s last minute like [Dentist]. Honestly, how does he expect to stay in business if he cancels on his patients like this?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I’ll be sure to tell [Dentist] that the next time one of his life-long friends unexpectedly dies, he should be more considerate of his patients.”

Patient: “See that you do!”